talking about diets at work - AIBU?

[nevereverever83]

Long time lurker here... bit of a weird one to start posting with!!

On fb last night a girl i used to work with for a bit a few years ago posted a blog she wrote about her eating disorder basically saying that everyone talking about their diets at work (at lots of jobs, not just with me) made her bulemic, or made her bulemia/anorexia worse. I have noticed this does seem to happen a lot at work (talking about diets and weight loss i mean) especially where there are lots of women like in admin or receptionists and things like that and it makes me sad to think that she or other girls might be making themselves worse because they don't like hearing about others people's diets, but i'm sort of on the fence about it. I'm quite overweight (about a size 14-16) and it's not like i'm greedy or anything but i've just gradually put on a few pounds every year since getting married and never really lost them. I've been on WW and SW and a few other diets and since some of the other girls at work are also trying to loose weight we do talk about it sometimes, and i actually find it really supportive and helpful to know that we can compare notes and recipes and diets and things like that, and it helps me. So my x colleagues suggestion (which i know whasn't just aimed at me) that basically we're making her bulemic kind of annoyes me... but i also do feel sorry for her. So really i'm wondering if IABU or if she is BU or maybe neither or both? What are yout thoughts on diet chat and body size/weight talk at work?

[sleepwhenidie]

I think talk about diets and weight is boring and insidious. Judging your own and other people's bodies, what you/they are or aren't eating, commenting when someone has lost weight (often intended as a compliment but, I promise, not always welcome or appreciated)...Diets don't work (if they did people would only need to do them once). They lead to disordered eating and also eating disorders and I think it all needs to stop, for everyone's sake.

If you want to find support on a diet then join a club or thread somewhere like here, then only the people who actively want to listen to your details and talk about theirs have to do so.

[almondpudding]

YANBU. Of course people are going to do things like swap recipes. Food is a big part of culture, and talking about healthy eating is helpful for many people.

[nevereverever83]

this is ther blog post btw medium.com/@EmmaHatred/eating-disorders-in-the-workplace-edaw-2016-784f3095c4fd because it's Eating Disoder Awareness Week at work

i do get what your saying but it's not like i would ever tell someone anorexic to lose weight or even to eat more, and obviously dont want to make anybody uncomfortable... and i do feel bad for hr but i don't know.
If diets don't work how is anyone supposed to lose weight?

[lighteningirl]

Lots of lives are saved and health issues resolved by losing weight I think the power of group support to help fight obesity trumps her personally

[Muskateersmummy]

I tend to be asked a lot about diets because I have recently lost a lot of weight. It's not something I talk about constantly unless I'm specifically asked. It's not surprising that it's a large topic of conversation, food and eating is a huge part of all of our lives.

I agree that diets don't work, changing to a healthy lifestyle is what will get weight off and keep it off.

[almondpudding]

OP, I've looked at and I don't really believe it. I've done SW and my mum has done WW. You can't skip breakfast and eat a slice of tomato for lunch. They're healthy eating plans not some kind of starvation diet.

I think she's projecting her own psychological issues on to her colleagues.

[FellOutOfBedTwice]

I agree with PP who said its just boring. I've worked in largely female workplaces where this is what the chat was constantly and I want to scream get a fucking life. Talk about something else. Anything else! All the interesting things in the world and you're talking about this bollocks. I genuinely think dieting was invented by men to keep women looking inwardly and hating themselves so that they wouldn't notice what was going on in the world /end rant

[mawbroon]

Oh god, the office diet chat made me lose the will to live. It's a big part of why I never want to work in an office ever again.

Diet, diet, blah, blah, ooooh cakes, shouldn't really but oh, well I'll have one anyway.......etc etc etc

Aaargh

[snowymountaintops]

Not sure how referring to food as 'syns' can ever be viewed as healthy in either a physiological or physical sense.

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

I have worked places where the diet chat in the office has made me want to throw myself out of the fourth floor window. Keep it to yourself or join a slimming club, it is just SO incredibly tedious and inane.

[oldlaundbooth]

I think the office diet chat in inevitable. If you want to join in, stay. If you don't, eat lunch some where else.

That's what women talk about - diet, fashion, laundry and childbirth. Maybe a bit of feminist chat thrown in if you are lucky.

[mawbroon]

Oh, it wasn't just at lunchtime! There was no bloody escape

[DraenorQueen]

Oh I loathe the constant food talk at work.

"Oooh, that looks healthy."
"Ooooh, what's that?"
"Oooh I was soooo naughty last night and had a mars bar."

I foolishly told a colleague I was trying to lose weight by massively overhauling my diet and I wish to fuck I hadn't. Every day there's yet another comment about my lunch, and today, in front of my handsome male colleague, "how much weight have you lost now? What do you want to get down to?" etc. I was not happy.

[Muskateersmummy]

For me "syns" is just a word, no different to points as ww use..... Nothing more nothing less. A way to ensure moderation. Now I'm at target and maintaining, I rarely look at them anyway as I know what foods I can and can't get away with, what to rein in if the number begins to rise.

[tabulahrasa]

Syns are short for synergy btw, because it works in synergy with the other parts of the eating plan...but it's an unfortunate shortening and they could have maybe thought about it a bit harder tbh.

[SwedishEdith]

Cannot stand people who talk about diets at work. So, so, so boring. And, being harsh, they never seem to work. It's the same people who are constantly "on a diet" and never seem to change shape at all.

[IceRoadDucker]

Of course YABU to be annoyed that an ex-colleague posted a blog talking about her eating disorder. It's not like she stood up in the middle of the canteen and called you all tedious cunts.

[SwedishEdith]

Syns will be very, very carefully thought about. Just enough to get into your subconscious.

[WorraLiberty]

If diets don't work how is anyone supposed to lose weight?

I'm not sure if that's a serious question, but loads of people lose weight by eating less, eating healthier food and exercising a lot more.

Lifestyle changes tend to work long term, a lot better than diets do.

[Zariyah]

YABU. It's Eating Disorder Awareness Week. "Diets" don't work long-term and food talk in the office in mind numbingly boring.

[Zariyah]

Also, she's very brave to talk about her mental health issue and how the impact of diet talk affects her.

[FullOfChoc]

If I remember rightly, SW used to call them sins! it changed to syns/synergy to get away from the negative connotations.

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

"That's what women talk about - diet, fashion, laundry and childbirth. Maybe a bit of feminist chat thrown in if you are lucky."

Jesus! I didn't realise Alf Garnett was a Mumsnetter

[ElinoristhenewEnid]

Hear hear SwedishEdith - I remember tedious conversations where I worked about diets, being 'good' this week, 'bad' weekends, my stomach must be shrinking etc. At the end of the year everyone on a diet was still the same weight!!

[almondpudding]

It will be against her institutions' code of research ethics to refer to former colleagues' behaviour without their consent in a blog linked to her research.