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Vow Renewal Invitation

(168 Posts)
ILoveACornishPasty Wed 17-Feb-16 18:09:58

I am completely prepared to be told I'm a tightwad so don't feel the need to hold back!

I've got back from work today to find an elaborate invitation to a vow renewal for our two friends who are back together and renewing their marriage vows after adultery on both sides. They were married five years ago and we attended the wedding and gave a generous gift. Today's invitation comes with a gift list, and the cheapest item on it is £75. I am not a fan of lists like this anyway (separate thread!) but really want to write a note referring them back to their previous gift, the one we have them when they promised not to commit adultery but before they both, er, committed adultery. I can't actually explain why I have found it so irritating....and maybe I am an awful person, but I just feel that it's a bit of a cheek. Any thoughts??

CaptainCrunch Wed 17-Feb-16 18:11:47

They're grabby fuckers. It's cool they're both willing to make another go of their relationship but involving other people and making a big show of "vow renewal" is just tacky. I'm not surprised you're irritated. I would File In Bin OP.

QOD Wed 17-Feb-16 18:12:33

Farkin ell

Worra fucking liberty!!!

They are taking the piss to the max

FrackingHell Wed 17-Feb-16 18:12:39

shock for real? write the note. maybe I'm an awful person too but not as awful as them grin

monkeysox Wed 17-Feb-16 18:15:00

I'd not buy a gift. A card and a bottle champagne maybe

ComeonSummer1 Wed 17-Feb-16 18:16:00

Grabby fuckers,

Go op and but them a box of condoms incase they both feel the call to fuck other people again. grin

Katenka Wed 17-Feb-16 18:16:36

We did a vow renewal after splitting and getting back together. 12 years after getting married.

We went abroad, told everyone they could come but were under no obligation to come as it was literally going to be half an hour on a beach. Just for us and the kids, no party afterwards.

Mum and dad came with us.

I think it's really cheeky to ask for gifts etc.

Our vow renewal was very personal (no one cheated) and private thing.

hiddenhome2 Wed 17-Feb-16 18:17:41

Oh dear, they must be trying to recapture those feelings they had on their Speshul Day hmm

Perhaps you could offer them £5 towards relationship counselling, which is what they undoubtedly need if they're going for vow renewal after such a ridiculously short time.

MrsBobDylan Wed 17-Feb-16 18:18:33

Don't go and don't give-the gift list shows what they are motivated by and it ain't true love.

acasualobserver Wed 17-Feb-16 18:18:47

In effect they are asking for a another set of wedding presents. Find out if this is likely to happen every five years so you can budget accordingly.

More bloody front than Blackpool!

Gatehouse77 Wed 17-Feb-16 18:21:58

It would decline politely and only respond to a direct question as to why. But they are soooo cheeky!

DH and I got back together after a separation (no adultery) and it was something for just us and our kids to celebrate. We bought new rings, took the kids to collect them and exchanged them all together on the beach!

No way would we have (a) invited anyone else (b) written a gift list!

WhereYouLeftIt Wed 17-Feb-16 18:23:06

Write the note.

ghostyslovesheep Wed 17-Feb-16 18:23:53

A short time ago
A gift we did bestow
Upon your wedding day
But you both had it away
But not with husband or wife
Really! - get a life
so please although I'm happy
be told - you are both grabby

now fuck off smile

ENormaSnob Wed 17-Feb-16 18:24:29


Cheeky fuckers shock

eddielizzard Wed 17-Feb-16 18:27:21

no. just no.

people can be so fucking self absorbed.

FullMoonDiva Wed 17-Feb-16 18:27:47

Personally I'd just decline, the grabby twats!

BackforGood Wed 17-Feb-16 18:28:26

Love Ghosty's poem, grin but, in RL, I'd probably just decline the invitation, and only say anything if they asked me directly.

PlaymobilPirate Wed 17-Feb-16 18:29:37

Write the note - they're greedy fuckers. No way would I go either!

DontCareHowIWantItNow Wed 17-Feb-16 18:30:02

Wow shock

StealthPolarBear Wed 17-Feb-16 18:32:24

There surely is an unwritten rule that vow renewals don't get gifts! ! I think flowers or champagne yes, as you would for any party, but not an expensive gift!

harrasseddotcom Wed 17-Feb-16 18:32:27

I'd probably go if they were good friends, but I certainly wouldnt be buying anything. Maybe a good luck card perhaps ?

MrsMook Wed 17-Feb-16 18:33:44

Grabby. I'm relaxed about gift lists and cash for weddings, but the traditional purpose is about setting up home together. They've already done that, and it's greedy for the same couple to repeat it especially after a short time.

ILoveACornishPasty Wed 17-Feb-16 18:35:47

I'm so relieved it's not just me!! I am loving the donation to counselling idea grin

CoraPirbright Wed 17-Feb-16 18:37:26

Good grief! I've heard it all now!! Cheeky fuckers!

MrsHathaway Wed 17-Feb-16 18:37:27

I'm agog and aghast.

I'd be very tempted to reply asking if they were kidding. Otherwise, I think pps' suggestion of condoms is excellent.

Gift list for vow renewal, pah.

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