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AIBU?

To think this woman at soft play was totally out of order?

52 replies

hypermum1 · 12/02/2016 14:53

so, i was at soft play with my2 year old daughter this morning, its a session we go to weekly and have done for ages. Anyway, long story short, my little girl pushed another child. Before I could get to her to tell her off, the mother of the child shoved my daughter and shouted no at her! i let it go and took my daughter away and told her in no uncertain terms that it was not acceptable to push people and to play nicely or we would be leaving. Inevitibly we came across the child again and this time he fell over my feet but the mother thought shed pushed him again and went in to one. She told me my daughter was a horrible little girl (in front of her), and that I should teach her some manners and I was a silly bitch! I was so shocked I was shaking. we left immediately but I did go back when I d calmed down to make a complaint about her. She totally over reacted! Yes my daughter should not have pushed her son but she is 2! She is learning what is and what isnt acceptable. and I repremanded her immdiately! She has been on the receiving end of plenty of slaps, pushes and pinches from other children. It happens. Im still shaking now and am now really worried about going back in case this awful woman is there!!!!!

OP posts:

Report

Waltermittythesequel · 12/02/2016 14:55

The problem is her, not you. And certainly not your two year old!

Don't let this nutter intimidate you into staying away.

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 12/02/2016 14:55

First time, just about fair enough as she saw it.

Second time, totally out of order! And I would complain to the staff...

katienana · 12/02/2016 14:57

Woman had no right at all to touch your daughter and I would have told her that straight away. Someone did that to my son when he'd been pushing, I was on my way over to intervene and tell him no when a grandparent got right in his face and shouted at him. I told her it was my responsibility to discipline my child and not to speak to him again.

DorotheaHomeAlone · 12/02/2016 14:58

Not even remotely fair enough for her to shove your daughter. I would have complained right then. That is never ok even with an older kid.

DownstairsMixUp · 12/02/2016 15:00

She touched your child? I would be furious.

hypermum1 · 12/02/2016 15:02

yes! She shoved her backwards! I knew I should have said something at the time but it was really busy and I didnt want to cause a scene so I let it go and tried to stay away from her!

OP posts:

Etainagain · 12/02/2016 15:19

Yes, she was bang out of order. Pleased to hear you complained about her.

catsinthecraddle · 12/02/2016 15:24

It would be ok to touch your child to prevent her from hurting another one, or grabbing her hand to make her let go (of hair for example). I am not sure about the "shoving", did she really sent her flying? If so, it's ridiculous and out of proportion.

Aren't you over-reacting a little bit? Shaking about this sounds a bit much.

As there are always 2 sides of a story, it sounds like you are both a nightmare frankly!

MadamDeathstare · 12/02/2016 15:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lauren15 · 12/02/2016 15:29

Did she actually push your DD? I would have gone straight to the manager. It's so out of order I'm struggling to believe it.

hypermum1 · 12/02/2016 15:31

Lauren15 yes she did. it was a 2 finger shove to the shoulder.

OP posts:

HSMMaCM · 12/02/2016 15:32

No way should she have pushed your DD. When she got cross the second time, I would have told her that her DC fell over and your DD did not push them.

KoalaDownUnder · 12/02/2016 15:33

Come off it, cats.

It's never okay for an adult to push a 2-year-old, fgs. How does the OP come out of this sounding like 'a nightmare'?

Pigeonpost · 12/02/2016 15:41

How is it ever acceptable to shove another parents' 2 year old?! She sounds like a fruit loop and you did right to lodge a complaint.

MadamDeathstare · 12/02/2016 15:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

APlaceOnTheCouch · 12/02/2016 15:47

It all sounds very dramatic and more than a bit unfortunate that you managed to trip up the same DC that your DD had already pushed.

It would never cross my mind to go back to a soft-play to complain about another adult. Is that a thing? Were you trying to get her banned? What did you hope the outcome would be?

Lauren15 · 12/02/2016 15:54

You had every right to kick up hell if she did that. I'd have been shaking too. Keep an eye out for her and if she gives you any shit, don't respond and go straight to the manager.

IceBeing · 12/02/2016 15:55

can I point out it isn't okay for adults to shove any 2 yos even ones they are genetically related to.

catsinthecraddle · 12/02/2016 15:56

KoalaDownUnder I didn't say it was acceptable to shove a child, I said it was ok to prevent them from hurting yours, even if it means making physical contact.

What's a "2 fingers shove"? Do you mean she put a hand flat on your kid to stop her from pushing hers again (like I would have done?) Did you even apologise to the mother? If an adult really "shove" a toddler, the poor thing would be flying across the room.

You do sound as bad as each other, one with insults, the other one creating a storm in a teacup.

Woodhill · 12/02/2016 16:04

Also calling you a bitch is totally uncalled for.

GruntledOne · 12/02/2016 16:06

What she did was an assault. I hope that, as an absolute minimum, the managers are giving her a strong warning that she will be banned if she ever does anything like that again.

Tanith · 12/02/2016 16:16

I had to touch a child at soft play earlier today. I didn't push him over, but I did touch his shoulder to get his attention and to stop him running over another child.

Why?

Because he was in the under 3 area when he was plainly older and he was causing mayhem. He'd already stamped one child's leg and knocked two toddlers flying.

His mother only arrived when I'd touched his shoulder and firmly warned him to be calm down because there were little ones there. She showed no concern towards the children he'd hurt and offered no apology: she simply berated me for speaking to her child - she was there now; apparently she was the one to talk to him (she didn't).

Frankly, if any child is displaying the downright dangerous behaviour this one was, I am going to put a stop to it and not waste time trying to work out which of the oblivious chatterers is supposed to be responsible.

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Tanith · 12/02/2016 16:20

That's not to say the woman the Op encountered was at all justified, by the way. Shocking behaviour!

Greengardenpixie · 12/02/2016 16:25

That reminds me of a time when i had a party at soft play. A little boy in that my dd had invited had hurt another child. The mother literally came up to my face and was incredibly aggressive to this little boy and then to me. I was so shocked. The other mums stood up for me but i was so embaressed about it. Soft play seems to bring the worst out in parents.

Hippahippahey · 12/02/2016 16:27

She shouldn't of pushed your child but I'm struggling to believe that bit tbh because I don't honk any parent would leave an adult push their child and not say anything.

Are you one of those parents who just sit there and let their child do as they please? I have no qualms in telling a child not to hurt another child/ to calm down.

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