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To be so pleased...

(11 Posts)
cjt110 Wed 10-Feb-16 09:07:22

.. I feel I am finally getting my life back together after having DS. He's 18m tomorrow and I am not a natural mother by any means but he is wanted, loved and cherished. I find some days really quite difficult and like Im not cut out for being a Mum, other days I'm ok.

So lately, I have been taking a bit more interest in myself and some hobbies. I've taken up very basic knitting which I do of an evening when DS is in bed and also joined 2 fitness classes at my gym next door.

I still struggle when DS is having a paddy because I won't give him the coat hanger I've just taken his jumper off, or because he wants to play with the bin, but I think because of the time out I have above, I'm getting better at it. Slowly. I'm doing more family orientated things like going out to the playgym, to the park etc and looking for things to do of a weekend with interest rather than dread.

I am doing ok. If anyone has any experiences to share that would help me, I'd be very grateful.

And as a nice sidenote, today was the first time in approx 8 months that I put DS down at nursery and he happily toddled off to play and we didn't have the usual tears and reaching for me when I go to leave.

Quoteunquote Wed 10-Feb-16 10:35:40

Fantastic, it sounds like a good mile stone to pass.

YouMakeMyDreams Wed 10-Feb-16 10:40:10

I remember that feeling well with my first. It does make such a huge huge difference to get some things that are your own and a reminder that you are a human being as well as a mum.
Even now after 13 years of being a mum I still get bogged down occasionally and have to remind myself to pull my socks up and do something for myself or for dh and I to go for a meal or a night I'm a hotel. I really do feel my mental health slips if I don't.

Sallyhasleftthebuilding Wed 10-Feb-16 10:43:09

I remember buying a small handbag - with just my stuff in it ! They joy of not having nappies and dummies etc

minipie Wed 10-Feb-16 10:44:50

I know just how you feel - this was the stage that life with DD started to feel enjoyable as opposed to a chore.

I then went and ballsed it up by getting pregnant with DD2 (who is now 10 months, so hopefully in another 8 months the fog will lift again). Also hadn't realised how tough 2 year olds can be.

If you're thinking of another I'd recommend at least a 3 year age gap!

ijustwannadance Wed 10-Feb-16 10:50:07

I felt just like you. I love being a mum but found being mostly alone with baby/toddler quite mindnumbing. I started back at work pt when DD was 18 months and it felt like I was finally becoming me again. I think it's vital to have your own time and head space to switch off from mummy mode. Happy mum = happy child.

mangocoveredlamb Wed 10-Feb-16 10:50:29

Between 18 and 20 months was a real turning point for me with DD. She was able to walk, and starred to be able to communicate. She's just about to turn two now, and although she can still be quite challenging we can talk about it and sort of reach a compromise now.

DH doesn't get home until 7 most nights so I wouldn't say I've started any hobbies. But I do enjoy watching the TV again!

cjt110 Wed 10-Feb-16 11:36:45

Im glad my little milestone isn't silly. I felt a bit daft after I'd posted.

I still battle with why isnt he talking yet, why dosnt he do this, why isnt he out of nappies like so and so's kid... All normal I guess?

ijustwannadance Wed 10-Feb-16 11:46:38

All kids are different. Stop comparing him to others it will drive you mad. Things like potty training won't work until the child is ready anyway. You are doing great.

Sighing Wed 10-Feb-16 11:49:52

Fantastic progress by the sound of it. Well done. Also hurrah for the knitting. (I am an occasional knitter). What projects are you currently thinking of/ getting on with?

cjt110 Wed 10-Feb-16 11:55:05

You are doing great Thank you x

Sighing I knitted my son a scarf and a matching hat. I only know garter stitch so the hat was a rectangle, folded over and stitched along one side and the top. He wears them both so thats great. Am now starting on a series of squares to stitch together as a blanket for him. I could do with learning some other basic knitting stitches(?) So I could do say all one colour in one stitch, another in another stitch etc.

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