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Aibu to hate my washing machine (seriously)

(85 Posts)
bibbitybobbityyhat Mon 08-Feb-16 21:48:15

Had my latest washing machine for two years. Or is it three now? Anyway, I can't stand it!! It irritates me HUGELY.

Set a full load of white shirts, t shirts, socks and undies off for a wash at 9.30. The display said it would take 2 hrs 35 min (long cottons wash with an extra rinse). Just been back in kitchen and it now says 1 hr 15 mins.

It is taking the p is it not? What is the point of having a smart machine if it isn't actually smart at all?

I shall continue to mutter unpleasant things to it every time I have to use it until it gives up. Its a bollocks of a machine, that's what it is.

LuisSuarezTeeth Mon 08-Feb-16 21:57:59

2hrs 35???shock

littlejolee Mon 08-Feb-16 21:58:03

Yanbu at all! What a piss take! it must be in league with mine

BrianCoxReborn Mon 08-Feb-16 22:06:04


Can I please add (in order to not start another thread) and avert your eyes if you are of a delicate predicament, my cunting bastarding cockwomble of a thundercunting Hetty Hoover.

Every time I use that fucking machine it tries to kill me.

It is a great vacuum cleaner except for the killing and the fact that it will pick up everything EXCEPT cat hair. WHATTHEFUCKITYFUCKUSELESSPEICEOFCRAP!!!!

Ahhh. I've been containing that rant for about a year. I feel a huge sense of release.

HavingBeenChastised Mon 08-Feb-16 22:08:18

What make is your machine? Mine's a BEKO (thanks Dad sad angry sad ) - I can hardly tell you how much I detest it. I mean, it works, but every time I see it I get angry grin It has only one cycle that is anything less than about 3 years. I hate it. Did I mention that?

bibbitybobbityyhat Mon 08-Feb-16 22:12:37

FUCKING HELL!!! <blood boiling>

It is now saying 46 minutes left to run on the cycle. I've just touched the glass and it is STONE FUCKING COLD!

I do not want to wash underwear in cold water thank you very much Bosch angry.

FinallyFreeFromItAll Mon 08-Feb-16 22:13:30

Is it a new fancy machine that calculates the time by the individual wash load?

For example I have a large capacity machine so cottons wash is 2hrs50 (normal on machines with this load size) but my machine weighs and recalculates both the time and water usage dependant on what I've put in. So generally it only takes 1hr30 - 2hrs to do the loads I put in.

If its like that just think of the electricity its saving you by reducing wash time.

carabos Mon 08-Feb-16 22:16:39

Ooh havingbeenchastised mine is a Beko too and I loathe and despise the very being of it. DH went out and bought it unbidden when the previous one died. First I knew of it was when it appeared like a frickin dalek in the kitchen. It's not even white ffs. And it takes days to do a wash unless you press the time save button (that doesn't always work), which means it takes hours instead. It's also noisier than the space shuttle.

It's a cheap, nasty, ugly pile of shit. I don't care for it at all wink.

TondelayaDellaVentamiglia Mon 08-Feb-16 22:19:34

my machine runs on a completely alternative space time continuum as well

BUT to get my revenge it is banished to an out house so I do not have to look at it and endure its stupid lying time warp excuses.


MayhemandMadness Mon 08-Feb-16 22:19:42

Mines a Hoover, I hate it with a passion only reserved for .... well really hatey things.

I have my eye on an indesit, it's pretty and probably actually works like it should. I feel that I am having an emotional affair with this new machine at times as I WANT IT REALLY BAD. It has a varible spin and temp control. <sighs>

FairyDustDreamer Mon 08-Feb-16 22:20:38

Our washing machine about 10 years old. It sounds like a plane landing on its final spin and pulsates as if it might explode. I am scared of it now.
It will only work on 30 and will leak all over the floor if I dare to change the setting. It has a charming black mould on the seal to add to its delightfulness.
We are broke but I have been browsing new machines [200 pound mark].
Getting excited about getting new machine.......

bibbitybobbityyhat Mon 08-Feb-16 22:29:52

Fucker has started spinning now! 1 hour after I put it on and it told me it was going to take 2 and a half.

That's it, I'm getting someone out to look at it and hopefully condemn it

LuisSuarezTeeth Mon 08-Feb-16 22:31:42

Can't you run it "manually"? Mine only ever takes 30 mins on the quick wash, apart from 1 hr 45 if I do a 90 degree for the white towels.

I would be putting my foot down with a heavy hand with this cheeky piece if white goods.

MotherKat Mon 08-Feb-16 23:00:00

We were living in a flat and thought a washer dryer would save space, went with the Hotpoint, solid reviews.
It eats t-shirts and turns my unlacy knickers decidedly doily shaped, eats DD's school shirts and refuses to remove embarrassing wine stains and I HateHateHateHateHate it and want it to die. I feel you OP

kippersyllabub Mon 08-Feb-16 23:05:22

I have a Miele. I love it and treat it like a family member. It replaced another Miele that was 13 years old and going strong but wasn't compatible with a new kitchen.

I honestly felt guilty when they took the old machine away as it was like a friend. The new one is just as reliable and monosyllabic in a Teutonic sort of way, but it has some extra Eco options and a nice display. It feels a bit like an affair though so I do have the guilt.

Longdistance Mon 08-Feb-16 23:06:31

I'm on my second Beko washing machine. My last one lasted 14 years shock
The one I have now, I've had a year, it's an 8kg loader. I use the quick wash, and mixed wash settings. Occasionally the delicates for my uniform.
Maybe we have a different model, my mil loves my machine too, as it's easy to use.

elephantoverthehill Mon 08-Feb-16 23:15:50

If I post about my washing machine it will give up the ghost tomorrow, so I won't and just touch wood instead.

poorpaws Mon 08-Feb-16 23:17:46

I've got a Miele and I love it too. Now my arse of a fridge/freezer ...

Claireshh Mon 08-Feb-16 23:24:04

Oh I have a Miele too and it is great. I have a pretty basic model too.

Can't believe I've felt compelled to post about the merits of my washing machine...

HarlettOScara Mon 08-Feb-16 23:31:38

My Hoover washing machine has a similar disregard for timing. A 9 minute spin cycle is more like 17 minutes. The tardy fucker.

My hatred is reserved for my fridge and freezer which, coincidentally, are both Beko...chosen only by virtue of the fact that they fit the space. I am very close to knocking down walls so that I have room for appliaces that understand their function in life.

travellinglighter Mon 08-Feb-16 23:37:55

I love my LG washing machine which is almost as irrational as you hating yours. It's partly an engineering thing, it has a direct drive which means no belt but I quite like the little tune it sings when it's done. I call it the "your pants are clean" song.

annandale Mon 08-Feb-16 23:41:46

DH had our Bosch machine quite a few years before he met me. TBH I'm not sure which of us he really prefers - I know better than to challenge for top position. Anyway, it is now a good 15 years old and still appears to enjoy washing clothes [pats it]

stayathomegardener Mon 08-Feb-16 23:50:45

I have a singing LG in black travellinglighter. I love it.

MadisonAvenue Tue 09-Feb-16 00:04:24

Haven't really got a problem with my washing machine (apart from the fact that it's a washer dryer and the dryer is, and always has been, useless) but that bastard of a fridge freezer of mine!! I've hated it since the minute it was switched on 5 years ago. It doesn't help though that I've never got over the loss of it's predecessor, a much-loved American fridge freezer which was too wide for the gap in the new kitchen when we moved here. I suppose we could've fitted it in as the kitchen is quite large but the only available spaces have radiators in the way, plus it would've left a gap to be filled.

ThisHorseCalledDonny Tue 09-Feb-16 00:18:53

Washer drier. Pah!

Does fucking neither.

AND bloody sneakily defaults back to 60 degrees when you put a delicate load in and boils the fuck out of it. Dryer runs way too fucking hot and shrinks anything the sneaky 60degree thing didn't get.

Hate the bloody thing.

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