Talk

Flip

AIBU?

To think "it's NOT FAIR!!!"

7 replies

SeldomAthleticFC · 08/02/2016 11:07

Just want to vent because I can't in real life...
My DStepSis is very lovely but I'm feeling resentful and it's making me miserable...
She inherited a house from her gran, which she lives in.
She then inherited £250k from her mum with which she bought a BTL.
She has now inherited another house(!!) AND £100k from her aunt.
She was complaining to me that, after the house and a few bits and pieces, she has to pay 40% in inheritance tax on the £100k so will "only" get £60k.
Plus it's going to take AGES before she'll start making any rental income from this new house...
Meanwhile, me and DP work full time and live in a 2 bed rented house with 3 kids. We can't afford to move somewhere bigger because the area we live is so expensive and we can't move away because DC1 & 2 need to be near their dad (my exH) and his family.
My DStepSis did offer to lend me the money for a rental deposit on a bigger place but we couldn't afford the rent anyway.
It's really awful that DStepSis's mum died young: my mum may drive me round the bend but I wouldn't trade her in for 3 houses and £60k.
BUT...
Why can't I just have one house of my own?? DP and I will never be able to save a deposit or afford a mortgage to buy a place and neither of us is likely to inherit anything.
Of course, I'm no worse off because of my sister's good fortune, but I feel more unhappy with my lot having spent a weekend listening to her "money worries"!!
Rant over! Not sure it's made me feel better but I had to get it out there. Thanks.

OP posts:

Report

Seeyounearertime · 08/02/2016 11:13

The house you live in makes little different to the home you make and its the home that's important.

Report

Baressentials · 08/02/2016 11:16

Money brings worries whether it is having too much or too little.

I don't blame you for the vent. We all sometimes have thoughts that make us resent/be envious of others (my worst one was resenting a good friend whose mum had died from cancer -I resented her because her mum was described as brave and fighting to stay alive for her children, my mum had committed suicide) I felt shit for having those thoughts and I had to work very hard to get rid of them.

You do have a home - it may not be ideal - but you have a home. You must be close to your dstepsis for her to offer to lend you money. Focus on that closeness if that doesn't work then scream into a pillow and do something nice for yourself today.

Report

CallieTorres · 08/02/2016 11:20

agree with the pp, vent here and let it all out - life is shittily unfair sometimes x

you'll get where you're meant to be in the end

Report

SeldomAthleticFC · 08/02/2016 11:36

Oh bless you all for being so lovely! I am a bit tired and emotional today and you've made me a little bit tearful.
Yes, I do have a happy home and although I can't see anything changing soon, it doesn't mean things will always be the same.
DSis is grieving for her aunt at the moment so I need to support her in that. I have a lot to be grateful for.

OP posts:

Report

ghostyslovesheep · 08/02/2016 12:11

to be fair her gran, aunt and MUM have died!

it may seem unfair but I wonder if she'd rather have her mum than a house x

Report

Baressentials · 08/02/2016 12:26

To be fair ghosty the op did say she wouldn't trade her mum for 3 houses or anything and acknowledges her stepsis losses.

Report

SeldomAthleticFC · 08/02/2016 18:33

Thanks, Bar.
Yes, ghosty, I do realise that I am much luckier than my step sis in that my mum is still around and has lived to see her grandchildren. And no amount of money can compensate DSSis for her loss.
I have much to be thankful for. I'm not in debt. I can afford food and clothes and pay my bills. I don't have a terminal illness. I don't live in a war zone. I have 3 happy, healthy DCs and a loving DP. I'm pretty lucky, really.