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At the pool - other adult behavior

(417 Posts)
CousCousDefinitely Sat 06-Feb-16 21:00:43

I was at our local leisure centre today. It's a private hotel one, if it makes a difference, so it's users would be a combination of members, hotel guests and you can also pay for a day pass. I'm a member.
It was busy as it is normally on a Saturday afternoon. There were two guys I hadn't seen before in the lanes section (where you can do serious swimming, up one side and down the other). I wanted to do 50 or so lengths but it was tricky as it was me and them in the section and they were doing handstands, diving in (under the no diving sign) and generally getting in the way. I get this with children sometimes but not usually adults in their 30s or 40s.
Im laid back so I just sort of went around them as best I could. They were swimming under me and making me nervous. So after about 20 lengths I gave up.
I went into the steamroom and they arrived in about 10 minutes after and stared at me up and down in a pervy uncomfortable way.
So they it clicked that the pool annoyance was probably on purpose.
I left and was pissed off that it made me felt so uncomfortable.
I was pissed off that I couldn't do anything to stop them staring, that they'd intrrupted my swim and that I couldnt complain to the lifeguard while I was there as it would have been awkward, or as I was leaving as I didn't want to appear racist. The two guys were speaking Arabic to each other which is pretty uncommon in my town.
My dh went to the pool after I got home, for his turn at a bit of child free peace and I described them to him. He came back and said they were in the hot tub (this was 2 hours after me) so they'd probably got a day pass and stayed to piss off more people.
Was I unreasonable to just leave and say nothing and if so, what should I have done or said? Either to them or to the lifeguard. I feel like such a chicken.

CousCousDefinitely Sat 06-Feb-16 21:07:05

Sorry, I forgot to add. I have been reading newspapers about asylum seekers going to pools and assaulting people in Germany. We are no where near asylum seekers here. But is this hanging around pool "thing" and being a nuisance a known thing that single male recently arrived Muslims do?

Itsmine Sat 06-Feb-16 21:09:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

icelollycraving Sat 06-Feb-16 21:10:49

What's happened to mn?

0christmastree5 Sat 06-Feb-16 21:11:09

I predict...... This will not go well.....

BuzzardBird Sat 06-Feb-16 21:13:25

How do you know they were speaking Arabic? It's not a common language so unless you know a few words I doubt you know.

Muslim is a religion btw, not a language.

Griphook Sat 06-Feb-16 21:14:09

If their behaviour made you feel uncomfortable, and they were using the facilities incorrectly then speaking to the life guard would have been the best thing to do.

I would feel very uncomfortable with someone swimming underneath me, and and being stared at in a creepy manner would make me feel vulnerable.

FarrowandBallAche Sat 06-Feb-16 21:15:15

You think that's ok behaviours IceLolly?

Vintage45 Sat 06-Feb-16 21:15:31

That seems like very strange behaviour by adults in a pool.

InkleWinkle Sat 06-Feb-16 21:16:15

How do you know they were speaking Arabic?
How do you know they were Muslim?

WhiteBlueDaisies Sat 06-Feb-16 21:16:21

Yes. Hanging around pools and perving at women is most definitely a thing.

I read it's one of the top 5 reasons Muslim men come to the UK. shock

icelollycraving Sat 06-Feb-16 21:17:06

I do not condone anyone being leery etc. The second post is like something from a daily mail letters page.

CousCousDefinitely Sat 06-Feb-16 21:17:35

Why though icelolly, are we not allowed to mention race or something? Are I wrong to question it?
Is staring something to mention to lifeguards though?I can't imagine them taking me seriously if I said can you stop those men staring? It's not really breaking a rule. Yes, I know the diving was, maybe I should have said that. I am not generally a complainer by nature.

maybebabybee Sat 06-Feb-16 21:17:57

How on earth do you know they were speaking Arabic??

Vintage45 Sat 06-Feb-16 21:18:08

I would have reported that behaviour.

OTheHugeManatee Sat 06-Feb-16 21:19:08

Not sure why you didn't just ask them to move from the lanes section? Or complain to a lifeguard of you didn't want the confrontation?

Ameliablue Sat 06-Feb-16 21:20:05

If they were messing about in the swimming lane, the lifeguard should have intervened.

InkleWinkle Sat 06-Feb-16 21:20:15

Their behaviour was unacceptable. You should have reported to staff. do you know they were Muslim?

icelollycraving Sat 06-Feb-16 21:20:19

If you had said to the lifeguard st the pool that you couldn't swim,or to a manager at reception that you weren't able to use facilities you pay for? I doubt they were asylum seekers heading straight for a spa day.

BuzzardBird Sat 06-Feb-16 21:21:03

Tell us what they said in Arabic, as you seem to know the language.

londonrach Sat 06-Feb-16 21:21:17

You should have reported the fact they were doing handstands in a swimming lane to the life guard on duty.

Griphook Sat 06-Feb-16 21:21:42

You can complain factually and say how it makes you feel. Staring isn't l
Illegal but they should still be pulled up on their behaviour.

BuzzardBird Sat 06-Feb-16 21:21:46

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

CousCousDefinitely Sat 06-Feb-16 21:21:48

Don't think it was daily mail I read about pool thing, it was some Facebook post, but yes, I didn't really know if it was blown out of proportion until my experience today.
I don't know if they were Muslim Buzzard Bird, total guess. But I did recognise the Arabic. Not the words but the sound and tone of the language.

BuzzardBird Sat 06-Feb-16 21:24:51

What words

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