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DH is unreasonable. I already know it. I just want to vent.

(16 Posts)
Scoopmuckdizzy Fri 05-Feb-16 17:03:19

I walk into the bathroom and he's stripped an entire section of wall of paint. Yes it needs sealing and repainting but it has done for months. So now I am left with a 4ft square patch of plaster that looks even worse than it did before. He said he just got carried away. If he'd bothered to clean up the flakes of paint from the floor it would have been something but that was just left too.

I am 20 weeks pregnant and trying to get by each day dealing with hyperemesis and do not need to be sorting this out now! He does this all the time. I know I'll be the one left do the work as his idea of getting it done includes a six month period of thinking time. I don't want to paint the bathroom- it seems a daunting enough task getting the baby's room decluttered and painted without having to do the bloody bathroom too!

Our bedroom is already upside down as he decided to pull everything out of his wardrobe to tidy. Half the stuff has been put away as he's now moved on to DSS room to 'sort'. Why can he not just finish something before starting on something else?!

I just want calm and order.

HermioneJeanGranger Fri 05-Feb-16 17:16:13

Lock him in each room and don't let him out until it's sorted? grin

YANBU at all, it must be so frustrating angry

Crispbutty Fri 05-Feb-16 17:19:00

If you can afford it, hire someone professional to come in and do it. Even threatening that sometimes gets the job done, and if not then make sure the threat is carried through.

Scoopmuckdizzy Fri 05-Feb-16 17:24:54

I've threatened to hire in a professional to do various other things around the house but he's so laid back he's not that bothered. When he eventually does what he says he will he does it brilliantly. He's a perfectionist and will do half a job to a very high standard and then leave the rest for another time.

CaptainCrunch Fri 05-Feb-16 17:33:58

Are you me op? Dh and I been married 30 years and he's never completely finished any diy job. It causes so much tension between us that we went on holiday in the summer for 3 weeks and I secretly arranged for a decorator to come in and do the whole house from top to bottom. He was actually delighted and I've decided this is the way forward.

Griphook Fri 05-Feb-16 17:41:13

Just leave his stuff in a pile in the floor for him to tidy up later, if needs be put it all in a black bag. Walk away, if he's done this befits he expecting you to sort the rest out?

Griphook Fri 05-Feb-16 17:42:32

Crossed post, don't finish his jobs, it's easy starting something, but it's not fair to expect you to continue.

Bin85 Fri 05-Feb-16 17:42:59

Sending understanding and sympathy

mouldycheesefan Fri 05-Feb-16 17:43:22

He has two weeks to finish the bathroom before you hire a decorator. He must clean up the paint flakes today. All th stuff out of the wardrobe must go back in this weekend or be taken to charity shops.
No new projects to be started without consultation with you and a proper timescale for completing.

NeedsAsockamnesty Fri 05-Feb-16 17:57:32

You could kill him and let a jury of your peers decide your punishment

3WiseWomen Fri 05-Feb-16 17:59:30

Put his stuff in the bedroom in a black bin bag and leave in a corner of the room. When he will have enough to rummage through the bag to find the stuff he needs, he'll sort it out.

Tell him that if it's not finished in 2 weeks, a decorator will be in. And tell him it's his job now to clean the bathroom as a normal weekly task as there is no way you will be cleaning the mess in the bathroom for him. It's easy isn't it to do some DIY just to leave the mess for someone else to clean up?

Ah no new 'projects' until the previous one is finsihed should be a rule.

A word of caution (experience talking here). PLease ensure that your bathroom is done by te time the baby comes. There is nothing worse than being surrounded by dust and paint when you also have a newborn in the house <looks at DH>

Goingtobeawesome Fri 05-Feb-16 18:03:00

Stop clearing up after him. You're not his mother. Tell him it needs to be done before the end of two weeks or else he's paying for the whole house to be done.

Elendon Fri 05-Feb-16 18:22:05

So he's d the experience of a baby and I'm presuming this is your first? Keep the calm and order for the last ten weeks. I understand the sickness, but give the guy a break, he'll get there.

Scoopmuckdizzy Fri 05-Feb-16 18:58:29

I like needsasockamnesty's suggestion!

Thank you for letting me vent.

It's our 3rd child together - I have toilet training DC who are in and out of the bathroom so leaving the mess for him to sort isn't ideal. As for his clothes he honestly wouldn't be bothered about rooting through a bin bag. I might actually relegate the rest of his clothes to bin bags and take over his wardrobe space for my clothes...

NeedsAsockamnesty Fri 05-Feb-16 19:21:23

For the record I am neither instructing nor ordering you, should you chose to kill him you are making a choice and on your own

JesusInTheCabbageVan Fri 05-Feb-16 19:44:34

Sounds to me like he's nesting confused Inefficiently. Why hasn't he been weeded out through natural selection?

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