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To be a bit annoyed my dgs didn't get a cuddle.

(191 Posts)
greensatin Thu 04-Feb-16 14:44:43

I was recently staying at DDs house for a few days last week. She has a DD aged nine and a DS who is four. One of the nights I was there my DD went out for a few hours leaving me with her DP and the two little ones.

The four year old bedtime is normally 7pm and the nine year old goes a bit later. Anyway I got to tuck DGS in bed and read him a story. Nice for me and nice for him, so all was good. However, a bit later, probably because he knew I was downstairs he kept calling down for things, another story, another drink etc. His daddy kept telling me to ignore it all otherwise he'd keep it up for ages. So he shouts up the stairs to be quiet, get in bed etc and dgs starts crying ."I want my nana" . DGs daddy told me to ignore him but I just couldn't, I couldn't resist his little voice calling for me. So I went up to give him another cuddle. WIBU to do this when the father said don't. He said I shouldn't have gone up, I said I didn't want to hear him crying. Who was right.

ThroughThickAndThin01 Thu 04-Feb-16 14:47:14

He was right. You should have backed him up.

MardyGrave Thu 04-Feb-16 14:48:14

Unless you are visiting once every other year from Australia, then yabu. I wouldn't appreciate my mil overruling me in my own home when it came to parenting my children, and it would make me less amenable to future visits.

SucculentsRock Thu 04-Feb-16 14:49:03

The dad was right, you shouldn't have gone against him. There would have been plenty of time for cuddles the next day.

milkingmachine1 Thu 04-Feb-16 14:49:11

Oh dear OP, I would not be happy if my MIL did this.

pilates Thu 04-Feb-16 14:49:20

He was.

gamerchick Thu 04-Feb-16 14:49:29

He was.

SalemSaberhagen Thu 04-Feb-16 14:49:31

Noooo, this would piss me off. It's the principle, you do not overrule the parents.


MitzyLeFrouf Thu 04-Feb-16 14:50:10

He was

Katenka Thu 04-Feb-16 14:50:27

Yabu. He is his parent. This is his decision to make.

It mils like you that cause all sorts of issues.

It's not your child and not your decision to make

Ridingthegravytrain Thu 04-Feb-16 14:51:52

Give an inch...

Yabu. This happens in our house and gps respect our wishes

strawberrypenguin Thu 04-Feb-16 14:51:55

Sorry I agree with pp's. Your DGS was trying it on and you pandered to him. If his parent said no you should have listened I assume they had been through this with him before and you could have undone a lot of hard work they've already put in to getting him to understand that bedtime is bedtime.

PurpleDaisies Thu 04-Feb-16 14:52:02

YABU. Really not helpful at all and I can understand why your ds in law was annoyed.

TwoLeftSocks Thu 04-Feb-16 14:52:40

He was. I would have been pissed off at that.

themumfairy Thu 04-Feb-16 14:53:07

Sorry but he was right.
I wouldn't be happy If my mil went against my decision.

NotMeNotYouNotAnyone Thu 04-Feb-16 14:53:19

Yabu, he's not your child, his parents are in charge not you, you need to respect their rules

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 04-Feb-16 14:53:23

this would piss me off too tbh. it cab takes weeks to break habits and you could have massively set back any work they have been doing with stopping the crap at bedtime. it takes one night to break weeks of work sometimes and fir that reason ywb massively U.

MsMims Thu 04-Feb-16 14:55:00

He was in the right, sorry, although can appreciate it must have been really hard to hear your DGS calling out for you.

Nanny0gg Thu 04-Feb-16 14:55:02

You are joking?


Oh dear...

AlwaysHopeful1 Thu 04-Feb-16 14:55:35

Yabu and undermined him. It's not your place to overrule him. And you don't get to be 'annoyed' over his rules.

Katedotness1963 Thu 04-Feb-16 14:55:47

You were wrong to go against him.

Whatdoidohelp Thu 04-Feb-16 14:56:12

His child his house his rules.

WaitroseCoffeeCostaCup Thu 04-Feb-16 14:56:20

I understand why you couldn't listen to someone you love crying for you op. Wish my parents had been more like you!

Aeroflotgirl Thu 04-Feb-16 14:56:22

YAbVU there is a bedtime routine for a reason. Dad already did cuddles and story, and now bed, or they will be up requesting things until the late evening.

Muskateersmummy Thu 04-Feb-16 14:57:29

Well, I personally wouldn't have left him to cry but that's our personal style of parenting. However as a GP you have to stand by and respect the parents way of parenting. If parents did the reverse in my house I would be annoyed. You can't undermine them

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