Live with my boyfriend/partner in a flat in central London. Am 31, he's 32. We've been together for 7 years. All is well for the most part. I had intended on marrying him.
Over the past year, one issue has developed. It seems like a very trivial issue -and it really is the only thing bothering me- but it isn't something I'm taking very lightly.
I leave for work in the mornings at 7:50. He leaves at 8:35. This means that he locks up. Our flat has a front door into a corridor, with two locks. Then, it had a main door to the street that needs a fob to open. I come home before he does.
Over the past 12 months, boyfriend has three times left for work but left the front door unlocked. First time he did it, I bollocked him. He was rightly ashamed, and promised to be more vigilant. Second time happened months, months later. Same routine, he apologised, I seethed for days.
Tonight I came home from work to an empty flat and unlocked door. I panicked, thought we'd been burgled. Luckily, everything is fine. But I refuse to tolerate this. And I refuse to live with a man who risks our property, our possessions and invalidates our insurance.
Now, I know he is under a lot of stress at the moment, in his high pressured city job - but I am too, in my own and I don't do this.
Also, I'm worried he may be ill and a doctor's appointment will be happening shortly.
But I don't think that these are good enough excuses for his blatant carelessness. Because that's what he is being - careless - he literally just wasn't thinking when he left the door open this morning. That is what he will say when he comes home and is gobsmacked and apologises profusely and I shout.
My question now is, what do I do? I cannot live with this. It categorically cannot happen again. What do I do to stop this? Why should I even have to, I'm not his parent.
As it stands, I've rang him 9 times and its gone straight to voicemail - underground I imagine. So I've texted him to tell him we've been burgled. Just to scare him really. He needs to feel how I felt coming home, hopefully scare some sense into him.
But beyond this, what do I do? I'm completely out of ideas.
MNHQ have commented on this thread
AIBU?
AIBU... completely, miserably, stupid boyfriend
Valan · 03/02/2016 20:06
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