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Help, boyfriend hasn't come home. AIBU to want to call the police?

(488 Posts)
Grapeeatingweirdo Sun 31-Jan-16 09:09:03

He has form for coming in at 6/7 am after an all nighter but this is really late for him. His phone is off. Starting to get worried. What's the next logical step here?

Dorie22 Sun 31-Jan-16 09:11:05

Do you have any of his friends numbers who he was out with last night? Perhaps its as simple as he passed out on a mates sofa and phone has died?

DianaT1969 Sun 31-Jan-16 09:11:16

Have you got phone numbers for friends he might have been with? Any idea where he went?

OhShutUpThomas Sun 31-Jan-16 09:14:09

I'd bet money he'll be back soon.

AnchorDownDeepBreath Sun 31-Jan-16 09:20:21

Was he out drinking? Remember tubes and trains were screwed up last night and some may not be running yet. His phone is probably dead. I think I'd presume he was sleeping it off somewhere for a while yet, and expect him to appear in the next few hours.

If he's not home and you've heard nothing by midday, I'd be more worried, although I believe the police don't do much about missing person reports until the person hasn't been seen for 24 hours. I'm not sure if that's true everywhere - part of me hopes not!

Creampastry Sun 31-Jan-16 09:20:31

He usually gets home at 6/7am and you're worried because he's two hours late?!

SeldomAthleticFC Sun 31-Jan-16 09:21:34

It's awful, isn't it? I had this with exH - even though I would know he was most likely just pissed and inconsiderate, I'd go mad with worry. He'd turn his phone off deliberately so I couldn't hassle him and then roll in at lunchtime as if nothing had happened.

It took me 7 years to LTB. I wish I'd done it sooner.

RainOhJoyus Sun 31-Jan-16 09:22:38

The 24 hours missing things is bollocks, depends on the situation and vulnerability if the person.

I'd try his friends that he was out with/phone other friends who might have his number and then if they think he should be home then stry 101

corlette Sun 31-Jan-16 09:24:05

He's asleep at a mate's house, will wake in few hours hungover up to the eyeballs and his mobile is dead.
I'm guessing it's 9.20am in the UK right now. Leave it till lunchtime and give his mates or family a quick text if you've not heard anything.
He'll be fine OP, try not to worry.

Grapeeatingweirdo Sun 31-Jan-16 09:24:13

Have called the police (the non emergency number) and they have no record of him being detained. Very unlikely as he's very law abiding.

He has form for going out "for one" at ten and rolling in at seven am. This is the latest he has ever stayed out!

He could be sleeping it off but I'm just so worried he's got into a fight or something. Again, he's not a fighter or a trouble maker of any kind but alcohol is a bitch!

Creampastry Sun 31-Jan-16 09:24:50

How old is he?

StillStayingClassySanDiego Sun 31-Jan-16 09:27:29

He's probably slept on someone's sofa. These threads usually result in the drunk partner rolling home mid afternoon.

firesidechat Sun 31-Jan-16 09:28:04

Threads like this on mn all the time. Never once has the man in question come to harm. They all come back with a massive hangover.

Grapeeatingweirdo Sun 31-Jan-16 09:32:26

Glad to hear that. He's 43 with two grown up kids. We've been together for six years.

PlumpFiction Sun 31-Jan-16 09:32:37

He'll probably roll in at some point in the next few hours. If I were you I'd make myself busy doing something nice for myself in the meantime. People like him never seem to realise the impact their actions have on others. Do give some thought as to how much of your life you're prepared to live like this. He might never change, ask yourself if that's truly how you want to live.

RainOhJoyus Sun 31-Jan-16 09:33:50

He deserves some grief when he comes home, wake up his friends that you knew he was out with last night and ask them

Grapeeatingweirdo Sun 31-Jan-16 09:36:10

He's going to get some grief, trust me. Police haven't seen him and the local hospital reception number keeps ringing out. I know it's silly but what if something has happened!

JohnLuther Sun 31-Jan-16 09:38:15

Nothing has happened, he's sleeping it off somewhere.

Grapeeatingweirdo Sun 31-Jan-16 09:39:07

He goes out with a barely charged phone, doesn't text all night and then crashes in at six/seven, pukes and pisses everywhere and is then out of action for the whole day.

It's just so inconsiderate

LagunaBubbles Sun 31-Jan-16 09:39:41

Alcohol isn't a "bitch", me and DH like a good drink but would never do this to each other. Blame your DP.

EponasWildDaughter Sun 31-Jan-16 09:40:37

Why are you even with him confused

I'm sure he'll be home to puke and piss everywhere soon.

LagunaBubbles Sun 31-Jan-16 09:40:48

Why do woman put up with this behaviour regularly?

Only1scoop Sun 31-Jan-16 09:41:30


SuckingEggs Sun 31-Jan-16 09:41:53

He sounds awful tbh. I hope he's ok but the behaviour you describe is vile.

Grapeeatingweirdo Sun 31-Jan-16 09:43:50

He's lovely, honestly. He just can't handle his Strongbow.

Bloody hell, have tried to phone the local hospital five times and keep getting cut off!

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