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To agree with this headteacher regarding wearing pyjamas as outdoor wear?

(404 Posts)
MaisyMooMoo Tue 26-Jan-16 19:18:42

MrsTerryPratchett Tue 26-Jan-16 19:22:57

I used to see a woman walking her child to school every day in pajamas. She had a haunted, sad look on her face and barely spoke to her child (I used to sit in a traffic jam near them). Over time, she gradually got smarter and engaged more. She looked more and more healthy.

I always wondered if she had a health condition like chronic pain or depression, which ended up being treated. She looked like it was a massive effort to get her child to school but she was there rain or shine.

I'm not saying this is everyone's story but how shit would she have felt if she'd been judged by the school?

MaisyMooMoo Tue 26-Jan-16 19:23:57

To save clicking on the link:

A primary school head teacher has written to parents asking them to wash in the morning and stop dropping their children off in their pyjamas.
Kate Chisholm, of Skerne Park Academy, Darlington, made the appeal after she noticed more and more adults wearing pyjamas at the school gates as well as at meetings and assemblies.

She said her aim was to help set a good example for pupils.
Parent Phil Naylor said wearing nightwear to school was "disgraceful".
Ms Chisholm said the final straw came when parents wore pyjamas to the Christmas show and to recent parents' evenings.
'Wash and get dressed'
"It just got to the point when I thought: 'enough's enough'," she said.
"I'm not trying to tell people what to do with their lives, but I just think having a really good role model first thing in the morning, getting yourself up, getting yourself dressed, ready for business, out to school is a really good example to set.
"I'm afraid wearing pyjamas, going to school, maybe doesn't reinforce that somehow."
In her letter, Ms Chisholm wrote: "If we're to raise standards it's not too much to ask parents to have a wash and get dressed."
"I have had loads of support from the community and people saying it's about time something was done. I have had far more positive responses than negative," she said.
"If I get the parents on board then we often get the children too and in order to get the best chances for the children we have to raise the bar with the parents."
School parent Mr Naylor said Ms Chisholm had his support: "It's disgraceful, we should be guiding our children not giving them bad habits."

MrsTerryPratchett Tue 26-Jan-16 19:25:31

Mr Naylor sounds like a judgmental arsecrack. I bet he's a right laugh at parties.

MaisyMooMoo Tue 26-Jan-16 19:26:57

MrsTerryPratchett That sounds very sad indeed and I imagine she had issues she was working through. I think for those who use it as some kind of fashion statement or can't be bothered to get dressed out of sheer laziness or see it as an inconvenience the headteacher has a point.

toastedbeagle Tue 26-Jan-16 19:29:10

I used to drop off my daughter to nursery in my pajamas. If I'd been up 4 times in the night with the baby I was just unable to manage getting 2 kids fed and dressed and myself. Now DS is 13m I still find it hard, he still wakes up twice and he's mobile so unsafe to leave for long enough to have a shower and wash hair. Even now it's one of the most depressing things about being a mum, I used to enjoy looking nice but now I avoid the mirror.

Dreamonastar Tue 26-Jan-16 19:30:54

I see this a lot near me (recently moved.)

WildeWoman Tue 26-Jan-16 19:31:30

This annoys me. Judgy fuckers.

You do not know what anyone is dealing with in their lives.

Fuck off. I'll wear what the hell I feel like wearing.

BackforGood Tue 26-Jan-16 19:33:30

Long thread already going on this

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Tue 26-Jan-16 19:33:57

What's she going to do if the parents don't cooperate.

TattyDevine Tue 26-Jan-16 19:35:54

I'm not a fan of Head Teachers telling parents how to live their lives, generally. Though I totally agree with her points about setting a good example, etc. I'm gobsmacked that it's such an issue she felt she had to raise it - school gates is one thing (nobody does this at our school, I have never seen it!) but turning up to plays and assemblies?!

I don't think it's necessarily fair to assume they haven't washed, they may choose PJ's as a fashion choice (I use the term loosely)

Though it is a reasonable assumption to make I suppose, thinking about it!

What would she do if they ignored her? Nothing she could do, really. So she's just asking. I don't suppose there's anything wrong with making a request.

WildeWoman Tue 26-Jan-16 19:35:56

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Tue 26-Jan-16 19:36:46

No one likes getting told what to do, and what to wear, do they. These are grown women. They can wear what they like

MaisyMooMoo Tue 26-Jan-16 19:37:04

Thanks BackforGood, I did have a quick look in AIBU to see if anyone had started a thread but didn't bother with Chat as I hardly ever go over there.

CrohnicallyAspie Tue 26-Jan-16 19:37:57

I've done it on a very rare occasion- I was up most of the night with diarrhoea and my stomach was too sore to contemplate wearing anything with an actual waistband. Yet I wanted my DD to go to nursery so I had the chance to recuperate a little with her out of the house!

In my defence, my pjs are plain so could be mistaken for yoga or jogging bottoms and I wore a coat over the top.

And I think as a one-off or some sort of emergency it's not too bad, I think the issue is when it's every day and not just as a result of it being difficult to get out of the house at that time. I can't believe there are some people going to parents' evenings in PJs, they've had all day to get dressed and presumably haven't had their full complement of children all that time (due to them being at school).

MaisyMooMoo Tue 26-Jan-16 19:39:41

I would have died of embarrassment had my mum dropped me off whilst wearing pyjamas. I think these days it's a trend thing. One person does it so others think it's acceptable too.

crumpet Tue 26-Jan-16 19:44:52

I always find the pyjama threads interesting. At the 6 schools my children attended between them I have never once seen a parent in pyjamas. Does this really happen?

CrohnicallyAspie Tue 26-Jan-16 19:49:27

I think it depends on the area. Schools in my town, I've never seen a parent in PJs.

Next town over, they have a sign in the main supermarket saying that they expect customers to be appropriately dressed (and then elaborates that they will not allow people to shop there in PJs or beachwear, because clearly some people think they are appropriate dress). And it's not unusual to see teenagers wearing onesies when out and about.

Maybe it is a case of seeing X wearing theirs so think it's OK.

SixtyFootDoll Tue 26-Jan-16 19:50:00

Totally agree. How much effort does it take to wash and get dressed in the morning.
Agree maybe the odd emergency, I've had done it once but didn't get out of the car.

Grilledaubergines Tue 26-Jan-16 19:50:33

Never seen PJs on the school run. And I would think someone was a lazy so and so if I did. Seriously, you can't get out of bed two mins earlier to change into jeans or even a tracksuit? You go to the school in clothes you've slept in. Yuck!

abbieanders Tue 26-Jan-16 19:51:27

I've never seen it (but I'm in Dublin). Suppose it happens. Some days are like that. However, I think wearing pyjamas to meetings and plays is possibly letting standards slip a bit too much.

MaisyMooMoo Tue 26-Jan-16 19:52:12

The odd morning occasion I suppose could be overlooked but turning up to a parents evening dressed in them is poor.

WoodHeaven Tue 26-Jan-16 19:53:15

Seen that people don't normally do their shopping in pjs, or go to work see a friend or anything else for that matter, the there is no reason for them to wear pj to drop their dcs at school.

That you aren't wearing full make up with smart clothes blabla and only whatever happened to be at hand is one thing, pj is another.

CocktailQueen Tue 26-Jan-16 19:54:05

I have never seen a parents in PJs. And I would be judgy about them too, I'm afraid.

Getting dressed - it's not hard to put on leggings, boots, top, coat. Only takes a minute.

DS would be mortified if I took him to school in PJs. That's setting the bar pretty low...

Caboodle Tue 26-Jan-16 19:54:57

Pyjamas are not outerwear.

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