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To think if you're ill you should be allowed to sleep??

(55 Posts)
MrsAttending Sun 24-Jan-16 17:43:35

Argh now this is making me pretty angry but I feel my OH is being totally unreasonable in this situation.

In short, GP has signed me off work. I'm on antibiotics which are doing their job and have been getting better each day.

I have still however, been incredibly tired and sleeping quite a lot during the day.

OH thinks I am being lazy and should be doing things around the house.

Trying to explain that I wasn't up to that yet is falling on deaf ears.

And I get comments like:

"You CAN'T be tired. You've slept all morning".

"You do seem to be sleeping a lot for someone who is OFF COLOUR!" yes because the GP routinely signs people off who are off colour hmm

"Well I guess I'll be doing dinner AGAIN" (I've barely been eating anyway so hardly caused an inconvenience).

Apparently it was appalling that I didn't help with the shopping yesterday.

The jobs OH wants me to do are things like going through boxes in the garage (things I would normally do when I am off work for a holiday - not ill!)

I feel so cross about it it's making me cry. shock

You bloody pick someone to be your partner who is supposed to love you no matter what and support you though things... Not
make you feel like crap! sad

(As a disclaimer, I have NEVER been signed off sick in my whole life so it's not even like OH can say it's happened before as it hasn't).


Cleensheetsandbedding Sun 24-Jan-16 17:45:05

No your not. Can you walk out the house and go stay at a friends ?

ChoudeBruxelles Sun 24-Jan-16 17:46:30

Tell him to piss off

Titsywoo Sun 24-Jan-16 17:46:35

That's awful. When I had the flu DH did everything without a word of complaint for 2 weeks. I would be really upset if he had acted like your DP has. Hope you feel better soon and when you do give him what for!

Lolimax Sun 24-Jan-16 17:47:20

No you aren't. DH has pneumonia and I'm not letting him do a thing. I'm knackered running around doing everything but he isn't going to get better otherwise. I've told him to do nothing as he's really weak and the slightest exertion is hurting him. flowers and hope you're feeling better soon.

Thattimeofyearagain Sun 24-Jan-16 17:47:45

Just tell him that if you were well enough to do jobs you would be in work. My dh has been similarly dense in the past and it had to be spelled out to him.

voodoolooloo Sun 24-Jan-16 17:51:20

He's being very unreasonable. Can you just decamp to the bedroom, headphones in and watch Netflix? Is he generally an arse?
Feel better soon thanks

CalleighDoodle Sun 24-Jan-16 17:53:44

Im currently signed off sick too. On antibiotics. Due back on wednesday but dont feel remotly well enough yet.

Anyway, ive not had extra sleeping time but i am resting. I slept in until 10.30am today and have pretty much done nothing but lie down and watch tv. apart from today i still had children to look after all day so ive not been able to rest as much as i need to recover. I think if i had been able to sleep and properly rest i would be better already. Anyway, my dh has done everything today and made the evening meals without being asked since ive been off. He is also keeping on top of the cleaning and doing the washing.

Your husband is being an arse.

PeppasNanna Sun 24-Jan-16 17:55:16

You know that saying, actions speak louder than words?

Hes treating you really badly.


It was a similar situation thst made me realise i needed to leave Dp...


arethereanyleftatall Sun 24-Jan-16 17:56:05

Can you go elsewhere - your parents?

Oysterbabe Sun 24-Jan-16 17:56:51

You need to tell him in no uncertain terms to get fucked.

PersephonePitstop Sun 24-Jan-16 18:01:28

Don't get dressed, stay in your PJs.

waitingforsomething Sun 24-Jan-16 18:01:34

Yanbu. I had shingles in December and was so ill. Even when the pain and blisters subsided i remained exhausted and unable to do much. DH just got on with cooking, washing and looking After kids. I would have been furious with this. Ignore

toffeeboffin Sun 24-Jan-16 18:03:13

Tell him to fuck off and go back to bed.

Imagine if he was the one ill!

RubyRoseViolet Sun 24-Jan-16 18:03:36

I feel for you op. Yanbu at all, he is being really nasty. Wait till he is ill, I bet he will expect you to look after him!

I think lack of sympathy when your partner is ill is such an unpleasant trait. Not sure what to advise you to actually do but definitely do not be pushed into doing more than you can cope with while you feel rough.

Imustgodowntotheseaagain Sun 24-Jan-16 18:03:46

You could get in a lot of trouble with your work if you were spotted cleaning out the garage while on sick leave! You're sick, your job is to get better. flowers

rosewithoutthorns Sun 24-Jan-16 18:05:47

It's very hard for the other person to understand though, so Im not sure the other half needs to get such a blasting. I'd get a bit pissed off after a couple of weeks of nursing someone.

RandomMess Sun 24-Jan-16 18:07:40


When DH was signed off sick and had been recovering for a while I was just so appreciative when I got up to help with the kids or dinner or anything. Yes I found it tough going (3 young dc) but he was ill and slept soooooooooooooooooo much.

The thought of clearing out boxes and stuff - what planet is he on!!!!

QuietWhenReading Sun 24-Jan-16 18:09:48

Can you go to your Mums?

Gobbolino6 Sun 24-Jan-16 18:11:29

Do you have DC?

AlwaysHopeful1 Sun 24-Jan-16 18:13:28

No you're notthanks he's very unsupportive and thinks you are just being lazy by the looks of it. Did he think the gp signed you off for fun?
My Dh works a 12-13 hour day and if I'm ill he will do 100% of everything and will get angry if I don't have a rest. Your oh is just ridiculous thinking you should be rooting around boxes!

MizK Sun 24-Jan-16 18:15:49


The more rest you get, the faster you will recover. He's being an idiot.

Don't even rise to it. Get yourself into a nice cosy bed, preferably with orders for your DH to sleep on the sofa.

expatinscotland Sun 24-Jan-16 18:16:54

'I'd get a bit pissed off after a couple of weeks of nursing someone.'

For your own spouse?! He's not nursing her, she's staying in bed. And we don't know if it's been 'a couple of weeks'. Even if it were, she's ill. You're all heart, rose. hmm

BillBrysonsBeard Sun 24-Jan-16 18:17:57

YANBU! Yes a good partner is supposed to have empathy and help out more while you're ill. It's called love! Hope you feel better soon flowers

Oysterbabe Sun 24-Jan-16 18:18:08

Let's hope your partner never developes a serious illness.

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