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AIBU?

To take it with Mumsnet about bullying on here?

199 replies

Monty27 · 21/01/2016 02:10

Well I've just done it anyway. And this will probably be deleted. I have just found a really old thread of mine from Christmas 2014 that one of HQ people deleted it on the grounds of that Monty is probably rocking around the Christmas tree. I was really distressed at the time and didn't come back to the thread because my laptop crashed. I now have a new one. (a year later) I have posted sporadically between then and now. Fuming.

OP posts:
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echt · 21/01/2016 02:30

A bit late, as I imagine MNHQ will tactfully tell you.

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FourShour · 21/01/2016 02:37

Were you being a berk?

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NoArmaniNoPunani · 21/01/2016 02:49

How is that bullying?

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EasterRobin · 21/01/2016 02:49

Hard to judge without knowing what was wrong with your thread. What do you think was the reason for the deletion.

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madwomanbackintheattic · 21/01/2016 03:25

Who was bullying? Your thread title and explanation doesn't really give enough info for anyone for anyone to work out what you are upset about. Being deleted? Mnhq thinking you were drunk? Other posters bullying you on the thread that got deleted?

Why was the thread deleted? Were you mouthing off at people and breaking the talk guidelines because you were distressed? Do you even know why the thread was deleted? It might have gone spectacularly tits up after your laptop crashed and so it was for your own protection? (In which case, possibly thanking them might have been a better option...)

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NaughtToThreeSadOnions · 21/01/2016 03:56

Are you suggesting that MMHQ are bullying you because they called you 'rocking' ie a bit drunk?!

Was the thread a little goady or ridiclous were you getting a lot of wtf you shouldn't say that or no don't understand what the issue is?!

They were politely trying to say that you were posting things that weren't appreciated by other posters and rather than label you a troll or trouble maker they were saying it was a one off and putting it down to the seasonal jollity.

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Monty27 · 21/01/2016 04:07

The thread was deleted because I didn't come back to it. As explained my laptop crashed and I had forgotten all about it. And no I wasn't being a berk. I was complaining however about Christmas threads because I admit it was a painful time. It had been deleted on the grounds that someone reported me and I think it was dawnmumsnet who deleted it with the comment that monty is probably rocking around the Christmas tree. As it was there was no sign of a tree in my house at that time and apart from laptop issues I was diagnosed with a serious bronchial issue then. And that is not asking for sympathy. Just pointing out how judgy this forum can be. I posted something earlier and someone was a bit nasty, not for the first time so it was when I was searching for that person's previous nasty posts that I found the above mentioned accusation of me being a troll because I hadn't returned to a thread I had started. Then it went POOF! That's all. I am no troll and have been using and contributing to threads. I just feel I have been singled out. Sigh. Sorry that was long.

OP posts:
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Groovee · 21/01/2016 04:11

If it is bothering you, the. Contact MNHQ direct.

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Monty27 · 21/01/2016 04:12

And no not goady or provocative in any way whatsoever. Polite as always.

OP posts:
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GreatFuckability · 21/01/2016 04:25

so what was the thread about? seems weird to delete a thread just because you didn't come back. must have been something else going on

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Monty27 · 21/01/2016 04:34

I have groovee. But just letting others know about it. How one can be judged on here.

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NaughtToThreeSadOnions · 21/01/2016 05:09

No still don't get it really, sorry. Monty is rocking around the Christmas tree isn't judgy it's a polite way of saying we know monty isn't a troll and she is probably just enjoying the season. Because how the hell would dawn know that you didn't have Christmas tree. I'm sorry you had a bad time but dawn or any one wasn't judging you in fact she was basically saying enough troll hunting leave her alone! It might not have been deleted because of you or any judgement of you but because of other posters reaction to you not returning to the thread.

The fact that you've found some one calling you a troll for not returning indicates that the thread probably turned in to troll hunting bun fight and MNHQ had many reports of have you seen this thread can you do something and they felt that it was best to take it down.

Your upset about being deleted and accused of being a troll by one person how would you have felt if you'd found a whole thread of people troll hunting.

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AnotherTimeMaybe · 21/01/2016 05:23

Some MNers here are bullies yes but don't think that's the case about MNHQ you just didn't like her choice of words and he thread was deleted cause of simple misunderstanding that's all. They haven't banned you at the end if he day

Does this actually upset you a year on? Surely you haven't been thinking about it for a year? You sound a bit sad, is everything ok?

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OwlCurrency · 21/01/2016 05:27

I understand why this has upset you.

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tobysmum77 · 21/01/2016 06:45

Bullying? Confused

No they deleted a thread and you think that's wrong. I can't believe that this is still bothering you 12 months on tbh.

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Coconutty · 21/01/2016 06:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NaughtToThreeSadOnions · 21/01/2016 06:56

Well that's it coconut MNHQ were trying to be humorous.

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Waltermittythesequel · 21/01/2016 06:57
Hmm
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londonrach · 21/01/2016 07:00

Christmas 2014....op contact mnhq or let it go. Its some time ago now. Ive always found mnhq very helpful. Just message them.

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Pistachiocray · 21/01/2016 07:00

Therevis bullying on mn. But don't think this is an example.

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BalloonSlayer · 21/01/2016 07:02

Not sure I agree that it's funny. I think it implies the OP was posting pissed and had got pissed enough to stop posting, so never mind. Which is a fair enough a lot of the time on here, but v hurtful if it turns out it's extremely far from the truth, which as Monty has pointed out, it was.

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BalloonSlayer · 21/01/2016 07:03

I can't believe that this is still bothering you 12 months on tbh.

I still stew about things that happened 35 years ago, Tobysmum, she's got nothing on me! 12 months is a relatively fresh grudge in my book!

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SqueegyBeckinheim · 21/01/2016 07:04

The deletion message is quite flippant. Most users probably found it funny, but I can see when it's about you, especially if you're not in a good frame of mind, it can be read as insulting. I think MNHQ were right to pull the thread though. No one could have possibly known that your laptop crashed, and when OPs don't return to threads troll hunting often breaks out.

I think you need to do an Elsa and let it go now though. It happened over twelve months ago and the deletion message wasn't meant as a personal attack.

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LynetteScavo · 21/01/2016 07:14

MN deleted the post to be kind to you.

Yes the deletion message was flippant but it was directed at an audience, not at you (you'd disappeared!)

There are some rude posters, cruel posters some dim posters and some bullies on MN, but I don't think this is an example of bullying.

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CakeFail · 21/01/2016 07:28

The deletion message is quite flippant. Most users probably found it funny, but I can see when it's about you, especially if you're not in a good frame of mind, it can be read as insulting. I think MNHQ were right to pull the thread though. No one could have possibly known that your laptop crashed, and when OPs don't return to threads troll hunting often breaks out.

Agree with this^^.

I used to have a similar username to you and thought you were me when I opened the thread - I'm easily confused and it is early! Brew

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