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I have been invited to a 2hr "inspiration evening"

(43 Posts)
ohdearlord Mon 18-Jan-16 15:18:56

to discuss the values held by DD's swimming club. So far as I can tell the values are, "don't be a twat and try to do better tomorrow than you did today". I have nothing of any use to add that.

AIBU to have other plans that night?

toffeeboffin Mon 18-Jan-16 15:26:13

YANBU.

Why aren't these people doing normal stuff, like at home watching the Good Wife and mumsnetting?

PurpleWithRed Mon 18-Jan-16 15:26:45

YABVU. Oh, hang on a minute, are you going to the pub instead? can I come too?

MrsTerryPratchett Mon 18-Jan-16 15:30:28

Emperor's new clothes. There will be others, too embarrassed to say anything. I suggest a loud, "Inspiration Evening? WTAF? Anyone fancy a pint?"

Wineandrosesagain Mon 18-Jan-16 15:34:26

Eh? A two hour meeting to discuss the values of a swimming club? WTAF? I suspect this is a ruse and you will find yourself at a pyramid selling event, or being indoctrinated into a cult! Please go to the meeting and report back.

CakeNinja Mon 18-Jan-16 15:36:19

Just send dd?
What the hell?

GiddyOnZackHunt Mon 18-Jan-16 15:38:21

Are they trying to recruit volunteers?

Zucker Mon 18-Jan-16 15:41:25

I suspect a selling evening of some sort too. Leave your purse at home wink

TheSpottedZebra Mon 18-Jan-16 15:43:39

Ooh will there be a PowerPoint? With inspirational quotes set against a backdrop of sunsets and/or trees?

Maybe you could be super - enthusiastic and take your own quotes along. But make them shit or slightly
nonsensical.

ohdearlord Mon 18-Jan-16 15:44:12

It is apparently to begin a discussion of our values so that they will be more than just pretty words hmm

With your collective approval I shall be staying home :-)

CuppaSarah Mon 18-Jan-16 15:44:44

Either recruiting volunteers or putting prices up. Under the guise of 'protecting their values'

Wineandrosesagain Mon 18-Jan-16 15:45:20

No, I do not approve of you staying home - please go!

ohdearlord Mon 18-Jan-16 15:46:20

My only real value as regards swimming is the DD learn the importance of not drowning.

But I get the feeling they want us to all be "engaged" and other equally buzz-wordy shite.

(And absolutely to buy stuff. Mountains of it. With DCs name on. For the price of a small mortgage.)

ohdearlord Mon 18-Jan-16 15:47:44

wineandroses really? I know at least one other parent who will, without a doubt, go. Will a proxy, albeit earnest, report do you?

Wolpertinger Mon 18-Jan-16 15:47:51

I forbid you to stay at home. I now really really really need to know how the values of a swimming club can fill a two hour meeting.

You need to go in the manner of an undercover reporter. We can all suggest values for you - see how bonkers they will accept in the spirit of inclusivity smile

ohdearlord Mon 18-Jan-16 15:49:36

Okay...

Send me your most ludicrous values statements and I shall try to work them in - assuming that my "don't be a twat" is not suitably lala...

RedToothBrush Mon 18-Jan-16 15:49:36

Ask for the minutes of the meeting as you can't attend.

Then burn them.

Wineandrosesagain Mon 18-Jan-16 15:49:58

A proxy and earnest report will have to do then...sniff.

Wineandrosesagain Mon 18-Jan-16 15:50:35

Cross posted - will give some thought to value statements (excited).

ohdearlord Mon 18-Jan-16 15:52:05

You've got two weeks - obviously we all needed a good amount of notice to prioritise this confused

AgathaF Mon 18-Jan-16 16:03:08

Guaranteed not to be inspiring!

lorelei9 Mon 18-Jan-16 16:08:08

Who comes up with this shite?!

Don't go but get minutes and share best with MN grin

cleaty Mon 18-Jan-16 16:08:33

"Water is defined as an essential nutrient because it is required in amounts that exceed the body's ability to produce it. All biochemical reactions occur in water. It fills the spaces in and between cells and helps form structures of large molecules such as protein and glycogen. Water is also required for digestion, absorption, transportation, dissolving nutrients, elimination of waste products and thermoregulation (Kleiner 1999)."

Quote this, then follow it up with the following values.

- To embrace the opportunity to gain additional essential nutrients, whilst pursuing happiness
- To value our children's cells, and also crucially the spaces in between them
- To see the timely and appropriate elimination of waste products, as an essential function.

I can carry on with this nonsensical shit forever. Can I go?

givemushypeasachance Mon 18-Jan-16 16:10:32

Where I work the favoured buzzwords include anything bespoke, being on the front foot and being reactive. I'm sure some reactive front-footing (or front-crawling?) could be worked into the values!

GruntledOne Mon 18-Jan-16 16:10:39

YANBU. You can tell them Gruntled says you shouldn't go. If you do go, try playing buzzphrase bingo - all right minded parents can draw up a list of aspirational phrases (e.g. thinking outside the box, blue sky thinking, thinking across the piece, reaching out, pulling things up the flagpole and seeing who salutes etc) and tick them off every time they're uttered, the winner is the one with the most ticks.

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