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to feel miffed that DS doesn't want me to read to him anymore!

(48 Posts)
cakedup Fri 15-Jan-16 13:20:20

I have been reading DS(10) bedtime stories every single night since he was a couple of years old. I would read to him for 30 - 45 mins, sometimes more.

When he was ill and off school one day, I found some online audio stories for him to listen to, which he enjoyed. In fact he enjoyed them so much, he wanted to carry on listening to them that evening in place of me reading his bedtime story. Ooh nice to have an evening off, I thought!

Then he wanted the audio the next night. Then the next...until 2 weeks later I realised I'd been given the boot sad .

I asked him what he liked about the audio stories that would make him want to replace his mother for a machine and he told me he liked the way they were read and the different voices they had for the characters.

shock hmm And before you think that is reasonable, I should mention that I have a drama degree and read very well, character voices and all thank you.

It's now two months later. We are scraping the barrel in finding some decent audio stories online but absolutely no sign of me returning to my role.

As an aside, he is profoundly dyslexic so has never been able to read chapter books himself so I thought I'd be story telling for a lot longer. I did not expect for it to end so soon and so abruptly.

Other recent changes: he has just started walking to/from school alone (I was doing all drop offs/pick ups before), for the first time ever is keeping his bedroom door closed - first during the day and now even at bedtime. He put a 'please knock' sign on his door too shock !

AIBU to feel a bit miffed I'm less needed as well as a bit proud that ds is getting more independent?

And do you think him not wanting me to read bedtime stories to him anymore is just a part of his whole growing up thing that he's doing at the moment? What other reason could there be?

OliviaDunham Fri 15-Jan-16 13:26:46

He's just growing up, it's hard I know, but it's inevitable.

cakedup Fri 15-Jan-16 13:28:44

But what's the difference whether I read him a bedtime story or whether 'Natasha' from reads him one??

Twitterqueen Fri 15-Jan-16 13:34:20

Have another child?
Not helpful I know, but couldn't resist

Wait until they start patting you on the head and saying "Mum, you just wouldn't understand..."

StillStayingClassySanDiego Fri 15-Jan-16 13:38:07

He's growing up, such is life.

Be proud and enjoy the extra free time you now have.

MitzyLeFrouf Fri 15-Jan-16 13:44:23

He's ten.

He's a big boy now.

MummyPig24 Fri 15-Jan-16 13:56:48

I've been given the boot too. Ds1 is 8 and prefers to read to himself in bed rather than me read to him. I feel a bit sad about it but he's growing up.

MagpieCursedTea Fri 15-Jan-16 14:01:02

If it makes you feel any better, my 2 year old refused to let me read him his bedtime story last night. He insisted on having it and reading himself. He obviously can't actually read yet but knows the story well enough to match what happens with the pictures. I felt very redundant!

HermioneJeanGranger Fri 15-Jan-16 14:03:23

He's growing up, that's all. I get it's tough, though.

LindyHemming Fri 15-Jan-16 14:05:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Helmetbymidnight Fri 15-Jan-16 14:08:18


It could be he likes the power.

If you say, pheww, I wanted some time off, he might say, oyyyy mum!

notmynameohno Fri 15-Jan-16 14:11:59

It is hard but you have instilled a love of stories which is a wonderful gift.
Libraries have story CDs for that age - modern & classics.

AnotherEffingOrangeRevel Fri 15-Jan-16 14:14:17

There are advantages to this, OP.
Personally, I like to listen to audio books with the DC. They get a story; I get a story; I get to close my eyes. Everyone's a winner.

And what helmet says.

CMOTDibbler Fri 15-Jan-16 14:17:15

My 9 year old likes to read to himself before bed. So now I lie next to him and we read companionably together.

In your ds's case I think that listening to an audiobook is much more peer approved than still having your mum read to you, so thats probably part of growing up. Mine walks to/from school, to/from the library by himself and is now talking about going swimming by himself <sniff>

cakedup Fri 15-Jan-16 14:18:23

Twitterqueen I'm 43 with no partner so definitely won't be having another child!

Well he's not that big MitzyLeFrouf as he still asks for 'cudddlewugs' that's the next thing to go isn't it sad

Ooh Euphemia and Helmetbymidnight I like your theories. I feel better when I can psychoanalyse make up stuff about the situation.

MotherKat Fri 15-Jan-16 14:20:20

I just want to send you a hug, my big 16 and far too old for stories, my nephew who is 13 likes one occasionally when he's poorly, my younger nephew is 11 and considers himself far too old for stories.
Looking forward to dusting off the Dr Seuss in a couple of months when the twins arrive.
You have every right to be both proud and sad.

cakedup Fri 15-Jan-16 14:20:24

Thanks for the tip notmynameohno, am about to write another thread about where I can get some decent audio stories, didn't think of the library.

cakedup Fri 15-Jan-16 14:24:19

AnotherEffingOrangeRevel I did think about asking him if he'd like me to come and listen with him. Although i'm now a bit attached to having that extra time in the evening.

You're right CMOTDibbler it could even be something like, someone at school making a reference about it being babyish.

cakedup Fri 15-Jan-16 14:27:15

Aww thank you MotherKat. Enjoy your stories with the twins! I was just gripped by the fear that I may never read a Dr Seuss book again. When DS is too old to have them on his bookshelf they'll be transferred to mine!

OneMagnumisneverenough Fri 15-Jan-16 14:31:41

You're lucky - I was booted to the side when mine were 7 sad fortunately that was because they didn't have your poor boys dyslexia and enjoyed reading themselves instead, but still.....

BertrandRussell Fri 15-Jan-16 14:33:14

Just go with it. Be available. Don't ask whether you can listen too- it'll put him in a difficult position if he wants to say no. Just say "goodnight- I'm in the living room if you need me" and hope against hope that he calls on you!

Oh, and you should have been knocking on his door for years.

WeAllHaveWings Fri 15-Jan-16 14:43:00

ds is 12 next month and wanted to read himself around 10-ish. He still enjoys cuddles at bedtime, hopefully you got a couple of years of them yet.

cakedup Fri 15-Jan-16 14:45:39

BertrandRussell but he's never had his door closed! (until recently).

LauraChant Fri 15-Jan-16 14:49:03

Awww. I have a really clear memory of being aged seven or eight, ill in bed, and my Dad offering to read me a Famous Five book. I said no, because I could read to myself quicker than people read to me, and it frustrated me that the story went so slowly when it was read aloud. I still feel guilty when I remember my Dad's face dropping and him saying "Oh! But you used to love being read to!"

At the time it felt like I hadn't been read to for years, but it only stopped when I got my own room apart from my sister and that was when I was seven or eight, so it can't have seemed that long ago to my Dad.

ImperialBlether Fri 15-Jan-16 14:49:18

If he's dyslexic but loves stories, have you thought of getting him into films? My son is at film school and says quite a few of the students are dyslexic.

Other than that, have you joined your library online? You can borrow audio recordings there and you can borrow from different libraries, too, to get more choice.

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