to be pissed off at my Dad?

[SoWhite]

My parents bought DH a really lovely Christmas gift.

DH decided to, without telling me, thank then by sending flowers, chocolates and a card to my parents in the post.

After payment and postage, DH told me what he had done. I didn't tell my parents, because it was supposed to a surprise.

I was on the phone to my Dad this evening. I asked had he received the gifts from DH.

Dad had received the parcels, but as he wasn't expecting anything he sent the delivery man away and refused to sign. Not open it and investigate, upon which all would have been explained. Nobody knows what happened to the parcel, and DH will not be refunded.

When I suggested that my Dad apologise to DH, I was rebuffed.

AIBU to be annoyed at my Dad for doing this? And to never surprise my parents with a nice delivery again, for fear of wasting my money?

[EponasWildDaughter]

It's quite odd to refuse a parcel which is specifically addressed to you, IMO.

How old is your dad OP?

[canyou]

Why send away a parcel addressed to you I would be chasing up the post office tbh as it has a tracking number it should be tracable. But yes I always give someone the heafs up re a delivary.

[SoWhite]

He is 74, but incredibly fit, able, and in sound mind. He still runs a business.

[ElsaAintAsColdAsMe]

Sounds like crossed wires and miscommunication to me.

It would have been wise to tell them to expect something, they were being very cautious sending it away without investigating further.

Your dh isn't due an apology imo. Just one of those things.

[honeysucklejasmine]

Yy to try the post office.

How odd of your Dad.

[Alisvolatpropiis]

That's a really odd thing to do!

[SoWhite]

Will check with the post.

What a faff though. Ffs Dad.

[Rebecca2014]

No idea what to say, very odd.

[DizzyDancer]

What a lovely thing your dh did

How bizarre of your dad though. I would expect him to apologise too!

Hopefully it can be tracked down

[whois]

That's really strange behaviour - why would You send away something that was actually addressed to you??

[SoWhite]

Because he's an idiot and overly paranoid about identity theft.

[SoWhite]

Parcel was adressed to Mr and Mrs Theirname.

[LizzieMacQueen]

Am I the only one who thinks it odd that you thank your parents for a Christmas gift by sending them another gift? Did you not just exchange gifts on Christmas Day?

[WaitrosePigeon]

What odd weirdo behaviour

[SuperCee7]

I get suspicious when I receive a parcel I'm not expecting forgotten Amazon orders . I don't think your dad is bu actually and I don't think he has anything to apologise for - how was he to know?
However If I was your dad I'd feel obligated to apologise despite not having done anything wrong.

My mum used to order things from a catalogue company. Sometimes they'd send "gifts" at a reduced price and they'd charge her because she accepted the parcels. Obviously she could return them but at a cost to her for postage etc. she closed her account but still gets random parcels and she won't accept them.

[SoWhite]

No, we live at opposite ends of the country, and this year didn't see my parents over Xmas.

It just so happened that this year, DH's gift from my parents was way more expensive than he was expecting, and so he wanted to say a specific thank you for their generosity.

[SoWhite]

The thank you present is not a usual thing, is what I'm trying to day. DH was just very surprised and grateful for the great lengths they'd gone to to get him something extra special.

[prettywhiteguitar]

Your dad sounds bonkers that would really have pissed me off. Who in the hell sends away a parcel that's addressed to them ???

[SoWhite]

I'm glad others are as confused as I am. My Dad made me feel as though I was the one who was bonkers.

[prettywhiteguitar]

Well honestly, he probably feels like a twit now.

But I have noticed with my mum how funny she's getting. It's probably his age

[LizzieMacQueen]

Ah okay, thanks for the explanation. Think my FIL is like your dad so perhaps it is a generational thing, suspicious of anything out of the ordinary.

As PP said I don't think your father need apologise because he didn't know what was going on so YWBU in this instance (to be pissed off at him).

[SoWhite]

I'm not that pissed off. Just bemused.

Parents ageing is scary, isn't it? 5-year-ago Dad was so different.

[pocketsaviour]

I once got out-carded for a parcel I had no idea was coming (because I'm horribly forgetful). I posted on FB "Oooh I've got a mystery parcel, no idea what it could be" and some people were like OH NO IT'S PROBABLY A SCAM DON'T ANSWER THE DOOR!!1!!1!

So there must be some kind of scare story out there about unexpected parcels, and your dad has fallen for it taken it a bit too keenly to heart. At least you now know to warn him of any parcels in future!

Is it possible your DH could contact the supplier and explain what happened and ask for a redelivery?

I understand your annoyance though. Kind of turns what was supposed to be a lovely gesture into a massive ballache :(

[SoWhite]

Kind of turns what was supposed to be a lovely gesture into a massive ball ache.

Exactly my annoyance! Something else to chase up!

[Tryingtojoinin]

I think you are being a bit harsh on your dad. There have been loads of examples in the press recently of older people being sent flowers, only for it to be part of a huge scam (send a small payment for acceptance and then something happens with the card). Over-cautious and a bit Daily Mail, perhaps, but at least you don't have to worry about him getting ripped off.