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to think DP could have shown a bit of concern when I'm choking on bathroom floor?

(46 Posts)
SpiderStardust Mon 11-Jan-16 19:46:20

I've been ill, got a chest infection and tonsillitis. I've been putting off running knowing it would do my chest in but today thought I was well enough to go for a run.

Got home and started coughing my guts up - ended up in bathroom on the floor being sick and struggling to catch my breath. DP popped his head in and said "you're being sick because you were retching". I told him I felt really dizzy, turned around and he'd gone!! Back to his computer playing in his stupid game. I remained on the floor for 5 or so minutes, got my breath back and finally managed to get up. As I passed him I said "thanks for the concern, I'll get myself a drink shall I" and he replied "well you never said you wanted one". No because I was too busy fucking choking!!!
AIBU to think an offer of a drink of even a quick "you ok? Need anything?" Might have been nice?

fusspot66 Mon 11-Jan-16 19:48:15

He was rather crap. But is it possible you have asthma

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes Mon 11-Jan-16 19:48:37

My DP can be like that.

Just stands there gormlessly not knowing/thinking what to do.



AppleJuiceFlood Mon 11-Jan-16 19:50:25

You are not be unreasonable to expect more sympathy - I also have a completely unsympathetic DH. Very annoying.

However, you are being a little bit unreasonable to go running when you are unwell with a chest infection and tonsillitis! A rest will do you more good. Get well soon. 🙂

SpiderStardust Mon 11-Jan-16 19:52:41

I do have exercise induced asthma but no pump as I try and get by without blush I'm just pissed off - I had so many plans for the new year, a new running regime, more dedication to my sport and I can't do any of it because of this lingering stupid bloody virus/bacteria. It just won't piss off!!

goodnightdarthvader1 Mon 11-Jan-16 19:55:05

Joffery, at least your DP stands there and doesn't just fuck off.

OP, he's bang out of order.

AppleJuiceFlood Mon 11-Jan-16 19:55:06

It's really annoying when you get one of these lingering viruses. Had one myself that went on for about 4 weeks last month and it was awful. Set yourself a goal for a weeks time and give yourself a bit more time.

Just keep in your mind the lack of sympathy you got from DH and pay it back next time he's ill. 😉

fusspot66 Mon 11-Jan-16 19:56:52

Sorry you had that 'do' in the bathroom but you're taking a real risk with your health. Asthma can kill. People also can damage their heart muscle when over exerting themselves with a viral infection
I knew a superfit guy who got cardiomyopathy from exercising with flu. He was dead a few months later.

PlopTheBarn0wl Mon 11-Jan-16 19:57:58

Nag alert...

Go to your GP and get an inhaler. The stats on deaths from asthma are scarily high. I felt like a right fool when I went in for the first time in ages and the asthma nurse told me off blush

lazyarse123 Mon 11-Jan-16 19:58:22

I hate when you drop something or make some loud or unusual noise in another room and nobody bothers, i usually just shout "don't worry, i'm fine". Somebody will inevitably reply "well you would've said if you needed help", not if i'm lying unconscious i won't. Selfish or what.

BigSandyBalls2015 Mon 11-Jan-16 19:59:09

My DH is the same. I fell down the stairs once and he heard all the commotion and came out into the hall to have a look at me lying there, with my ankle starting to swell up. He muttered a few sympathies then disappeared ..... I assumed to go to the freezer to get a bag of peas or similar. A few minutes passed, no DH, so I drag myself to the window and he's out on the drive washing the car .... the fecking useless bastard.

WhetherOrNot Mon 11-Jan-16 19:59:09

I agree with fusspot - you are taking a huuuuuuuge risk with your health not using an inhaler/preventer.

LalaLyra Mon 11-Jan-16 20:01:57

Please don't try and deal with your asthma yourself, especially if you have plans to increase your exercise.

The reason you don't hear about people dying of asthma daily is because of treatment, not because it isn't a killer condition anymore. Most people are really shocked when they hear/realise just how many people it does kill.

StayWithMe Mon 11-Jan-16 20:04:13

Catch yourself on OP. Get an inhaler and use it. I've nursed people with brain injuries due to asthma.

P.s. You're DH is a prat.

WilLiAmHerschel Mon 11-Jan-16 20:05:15

Yanbu for wanting sympathy and care but yabu for running when you have a chest infection, especially when you have exercise induced asthma and don't carry a pump.

Ever since I heard about Stewart from The Apprentice dying of an asthma attack I suddenly realised how dangerous it really is and how irresponsible I've been for not always having an inhalor. It really is scary just how many people it kills.

As a slight aside, if you are very wheezy and have no inhalor a strong shot of coffee can give some relief. I've done it in emergencies.

chocomochi Mon 11-Jan-16 20:05:20

Going off topic of your AIBU.....

Please don't try to "get by" without using your inhalers properly, especially if you have exercise induced asthma. My DD2 has been in A&E many times because of her asthma attacks and not having it under control when she has a cold. Thankfully it's under control now.

ohtheholidays Mon 11-Jan-16 20:10:08

Some husbands are fucking useless!

That sounds bloody scary OP,like another poster said if he ever feels ill treat him the same.

And get yourself to the Dr,we nearly lost my sister-in-law a few years ago to asthma,she'd coped fine with hers and then one morning she started coughing and just collapsed onto the living room floor,luckily it was my brothers day of,he rang 999 and they rushed my sister-in-law into hospital she had to stay in for 2 weeks and she'd been fine before that.

redjoker Mon 11-Jan-16 20:23:23

I live with one like that; perfectly lovable but not a sympathetic bone in his body! you are not alone!

Goingtobeawesome Mon 11-Jan-16 20:29:19

Get a flipping inhaler! Asthma can kill.

handslikecowstits Mon 11-Jan-16 20:29:57

YANBU. My husband has held my hair when I've been puking after having overdone the cooking sherry. blush

He'd have definitely shown a lot of concern.

My father on the other hand would have done just as your husband did and he's a berk.

HellonHeels Mon 11-Jan-16 20:33:28

YANBU about your seemingly-useless DH. However you're BtotallyU in your casual attitude to your asthma and in going for a run while you have a chest infection.

Why do you expect your DH to have more concern for you than you show yourself?

KitKat1985 Mon 11-Jan-16 20:35:27

Yes I agree your husband could have been more a lot more sympathetic. Although in fairness I probably would have been a bit lacking in sympathy as well as going running with a chest infection and tonsillitis was a bit of a silly thing to do, even more so when you have exercise induced asthma as well. Also he may have thought if you were well enough to go running then you can't be that poorly? Trying to be devils advocate here to explain his poor response.

BombadierFritz Mon 11-Jan-16 20:38:05

HellonHeels has it right. You show a disregard for your own health. You cant complain when others then do so too. Exercise induced asthma + this weather + a viral infection/cough = trouble. I had the same last week. Not used my preventor all year but have started back on it. I couldnt breathe for a few mins for coughing!

TaliZorahVasNormandy Mon 11-Jan-16 20:41:40

I feel for you. I'm 2 weeks into a chest infection and a bastard cough that seem to strike at the crappest moments. I couldnt even talk because talking set off the coughing. After meds and my inhaler because I was rattling (Never before have I felt like that. I dont have Asthma), I'm feeling better.

Go and get a pump. My ex has slight asthma, he doesnt have many attacks but its there if he needs it.

TaliZorahVasNormandy Mon 11-Jan-16 20:43:31

Oh and I had to have a week off work because I answer phones all day long and my voice wouldnt have stood for that. Plus I felt like utter crap.

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