Jumping on the bandwagon

[liz70]

I too, feel the need to warn folk - of washing up liquid bottles. I once tried to unscrew the top off one when it was near empty, to rinse the last dregs of it out. As I was doing so, the flippy off thing tore away from the neck, and the jagged edge cut my hand between thumb and forefinger. It bled a bit and was sore for a day or two. #sadface Kicking myself now for not seeking compensation from Tesco! #crossface

[MrsLeighHalfpenny]

I once made a cup of tea, and spilled the water on my hand. It gave me a nasty burn. There should be a warning on kettles that the hot water can be dangerous. Do you think I can make a claim against Russell Hobbs?

[Asskicker]

Our office had 'caution hot water' next to each kettle.

I think all kettles should come with that sign as standard.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

My shampoo had a label saying, "do not eat" so I assumed it was eyewash. Now my eyes hurt. I want compensation and a warning, "do not put in eyes" as well.

[goodnightdarthvader1]

Just last week I pulled a tray out of the oven, the oven rack came with it, flipped upside down and landed on my foot. I now have a series of burn lines across my foot. I want all ovens banned.

[liz70]

That just serves you right for taking a tray out of the oven without wearing flameproof safety boots, then.

[goodnightdarthvader1]

Liz, flameproof safety boots should have been provided WITH the oven. Or there should have been a warning on the oven door

(In all seriousness, I'd only 5 mins before taken my shoes off. If I'd left them on (trainers) I wouldn't have gotten burnt. Was giving myself a few looks in my head.)

[GraceKellysLeftArm]

Some of you should be thankful you're not children of the 70's. Findus crispy pancakes and napalm burns. Fed to us by our mothers.

[ghostyslovesheep]

If you wear contact lenses remember not to look directly into the oven when you open the door or they will melt onto you eyeball

[ThenLaterWhenItGotDark]

You should pop over to us in Italy Grace. Findus crispy pancakes are the Latest Big Thing.

We all walk around with our gobs half open doing that arm wavy thing in front of our faces and going "ah ah ah ah ahhhhhh!"

[ArkATerre]

But if you swap them for glasses they instantly steam up, you miss the shelf you are aiming for and drag a whole boiling casserole onto your feet.

[liz70]

Not to mention bouncing about with siblings on the back floor of estate cars, for 8 hour journeys to holiday destinations. Happy times.

[dodobookends]

I took a lump of frozen cod out of the freezer earlier, and it slipped out of my hand and landed on my big toenail. t's really painful. Frozen food should carry a warning that it should only be removed from the freezer while you are wearing steel-toecapped boots.

[GraceKellysLeftArm]

Later- wow! The Italians are embracing British cuisine at last! Tell them to swap olives, walnuts and finest salamis for a pepperoni and a packet of hula hoops. Trade in gelato for mr whippy!

[GraceKellysLeftArm]

What about prosecco? I drank a while bottle last week and fell off the back step when having a fag. I could've broken my ankle.

[ThenLaterWhenItGotDark]

They've started selling Walkers crisps as well. Oddly called "Lays" and McVities digestives. Now, they do have a health warning in the Italian supermarkets. They are stored, you guessed it, not with the biscuits, but with the low-cal stuff/Aloe Vera juice/seitan palava. Now a big sign has been put up saying "even though these are called digestives, they won't be as good as an alka-seltzer or a gaviscon"

[ghostyslovesheep]

agreed Ark

so ovens should just be banned

also stoves - when on - are hot - ban them

[ThenLaterWhenItGotDark]

And (further hijack sorry) Kraft cheese slices-the dog's bollocks here. Probably quite literally (according to a supervisor in the factory I knew)

[CigarsofthePharoahs]

I dropped a chair on my foot once and it gave me a perfectly square bruise.
The chair should have come with a warning "WARNING Item liable to fall if dropped" and it should have come with a pair of steel toecapped boots.
However, I once ordered a coffee from Starbucks and the cup said "Warning, contents HOT" but it wasn't, barely lukewarm. Bloody health and safety culture, ruining coffee.

[ThenLaterWhenItGotDark]

You know that contact lens thing?

When I was young a story went round our school that at the dentist, the dentist used a specific toothy thingy on a patient and it lazered her contacts to her eyeballs and so you always had to be careful to shut your eyes when in the chair.

[GraceKellysLeftArm]

Later - that is joyous! Normally the sort of think found on a Chinese supermarket shelf lost in translation thing.

[Ellybellyboo]

Crumpets should be banned too. I cut my little finger on one yesterday when I was getting it out of the toaster

And door handles. I caught the belt loop on my jeans on the living room door handle while rushing to answer the door (impatient postman), walloped my knee and ended up with a beauty of a bruise (and had to answer the door still attached to the door handle) Perhaps we should ban postmen and belt loops too, just to be on the safe side.

And car boots, I shut mine on my own head last year

[Asskicker]

Oddly called "Lays"

They are called that in America. Ruins it for me!

There should be warning 'British people may have the eating experience ruined by the name'

[AdoraBell]

I made a coffee this afternoon, at home in my own kitchen, using familiar equipment. This process passed without incident but when I took a bloody great gulp of my coffee I burnt not only my mouth, but my throat as well.

I am currently writing Letters of Complaint to the manufactures of the kettle. Also the company who sold me the coffee, and those who supply clean and safe water to my home completely recklessly.

[liz70]

Try sucking a Mini Milk. Just be careful, though - they're the exact shape and size to slip down a person's throat and choke them to death. In fact, scrap that advice - they should definitely be banned.

[coffeeisnectar]

Dd dropped a jar of branston pickle on her toe so add that to the ban list. Or force them to add a handle to the jar.