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To think DH is a selfish ejit?

(53 Posts)
PigInMuck86 Mon 04-Jan-16 22:36:06

Vomiting bug in school. Dd1 (7) has gone to bed complaining of a sore tummy, dd2 (5) has been sick three times and still feels sick. Baby (6 months) is restless and I'm not sure if it's the bug or just out of routine. I've moved to sleep with baby to keep an eye while listening for dd1&2 being sick. DH? Well he needs to sleep as he's leaving for work at 6 as he 'has' to go the gym. So looks like I'm on sick duty and no chance of an hours nap in the morning :-( Or a hand with the sicky laundry pile. Bloody men. Why are they my problem? Their his kids too!

TheSecondViola Mon 04-Jan-16 22:37:39

Er no, not "bloody men". Your man is the one you have the problem with, not any others.
Why do you put up with his shit, more to the point?

ImperialBlether Mon 04-Jan-16 22:38:55

I don't know anyone who'd be like this. Or maybe one or two who've been divorced now. Don't accept this as something men do!

Imnotaslimjim Mon 04-Jan-16 22:40:10

What a selfish arse! "has" to go to the gym indeed! Has to get out of the way so you don't assign him sick duties in the morning!

Sorry but I'd be having it out with him, its very unfair for him to expect you to just get on with it

Mmmmcake123 Mon 04-Jan-16 22:43:45

I wouldn't be able to control myself if dp said that to me, he'd be well and truly given the reasons why he is going to be part of the mopping up. There'd be no end til he did more than his fair share for trying to get out of it in the first place. Tell him

Finola1step Mon 04-Jan-16 22:44:58

Nope, not selfish men. But your Dh is. Hope the night goes ok for you.

mrsfuzzy Mon 04-Jan-16 22:46:59

so gym is more important than his sick dcs -nice one, what a....

Dipankrispaneven Mon 04-Jan-16 22:48:51

I assume you pointed out that your sick children come before his need to go to the gym? What was his response?

Crazybaglady Mon 04-Jan-16 22:49:12

Do we share a DP? OP, mine was exactly the same. My 6 year old was very poorly and needed to go doctors, 6 month old (at the time) was napping but DP couldn't stay and keep an ear out for baby becuase he 'had to go' (3 hours before work... Work 30 mins away) he didn't have to go. He wanted to go.

They're both selfish eejits.

Cuppaand2biscuits Mon 04-Jan-16 22:52:11

My dp would be exactly the same. When my son, aged about 9 months bumped his head and vomited and I wanted to take him to A&E early one Sunday morning, he said, from his bed "you'll be alright on your own won't you? "
He didn't even try to get out of the A &E trip by offering to stay home with our other child, he was happy for me to take her along for the ride.
As I was leaving he asked, you don't need me do you? I told him he shouldn't even be asking the question, he should be dressed and ready to head out the door beside me. He got dressed and came but he wasn't happy.

Canyouforgiveher Mon 04-Jan-16 22:52:48

Tell him he cannot go to the gym because his children are sick.

Most men wouldn't do this. don't kid yourself that this is normal acceptable behaviour.

LagunaBubbles Mon 04-Jan-16 22:54:28

Why are they your problem? Because I presume you put up with his selfish behaviour.

Stars1 Mon 04-Jan-16 22:55:39

I so hope your DH gets the bug , but worse!

Sorry but he is a tool.

LagunaBubbles Mon 04-Jan-16 22:56:30

Cuppa your "D"P sounds like a compete and utter twat. But it's your relationship.

MumOnTheRunCatchingUp Mon 04-Jan-16 22:59:03

Is it 1950?

InitialsError Mon 04-Jan-16 23:00:25

I don't think this is normal behaviour for men either. He should skip the gym and do his fair share of caring for his ill children.

I normally do night wakings because DH needs to be rested for work, but if there's a sick child at night situation, then DH gets stuck right in with either clean up or comforting sick child without any complaints or trying to wriggle out if it.

Hope tonight goes okay for you.

NewLife4Me Mon 04-Jan-16 23:00:35

Just yours I'm afraid.
I've always been a sahm able to nap during the day if dc were ill, but in 24 years of raising dc my dh would never have dreamt of doing this, nor others I know.
What a twat.

Coco0123 Mon 04-Jan-16 23:04:53

Ex-h was no different to yours op. Hence he became ex.

lorelei9 Mon 04-Jan-16 23:07:01


tell him his children aren't well and he will have to sacrifice a gym visit

I too bloody love the gym but seriously....!

ReadyPlayerOne Mon 04-Jan-16 23:11:25

DS was sick recently. He threw up twice in the night; I only awoke to the second one as DH had sorted him the first time, not wanting to wake me as I'm always on night duty with the baby. DH was in the middle of cleaning DS up when I came to see what was going on. I apologised for not having heard, but he wouldn't here it; he had hoped the baby and I would sleep through it.
I hasten to add that this was a work night, but fortunately DS was fine after that second time. I, being on mat leave, minded DS during the day and sorted the sick clothes DH had put in the wash.

That's how partnerships work.

Concerned97 Mon 04-Jan-16 23:19:09

YANBU no way would my DH have dealt with things that way!!!

I totally hate the blanket men are useless with DCs rubbish!

Catch on its 2016!!!

Finola1step Mon 04-Jan-16 23:22:05

Vomiting bug + 2 dc and a baby = all hands on deck.

It doesn't matter who clears up what, as long as you've got each other's back. So in this situation, I would simply ask "Why do you think it is ok to go to the gym tomorrow morning?" And sit back and listen to what he says. I mean really, really listen. It may well tell you all you need to know.

BlackeyedShepherdsbringsheep Mon 04-Jan-16 23:24:11

my ex was like that too. ditto all the comments that have been applied. and some.

ProcrastinatorGeneral Mon 04-Jan-16 23:36:33

My ex couldn't handle cleaning the sick up (he tried once, it wasn't pretty or pleasant for either of us, particularly me as I had triple the vomit to clean up) so he'd be on bathing the child and finding clean clothes and bedlinen duty while I did the cleanup. Why the fuck to people pander to these utter dicks that assume they're not responsible for their offspring?

BathtimeFunkster Mon 04-Jan-16 23:45:22

There are good men who wouldn't dream of doing this.

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