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To want to continue reading aloud every night to my kids (aged 7 & 9) when they should be reading independently more?

(50 Posts)
wannabuyawatch Thu 31-Dec-15 13:02:59

One of my great parenting pleasures has always been reading aloud to my kids and it is getting even better now that we are into Roald Dahl, David Walliams, Enid Blyton etc. I read out loud to them as much as possible - bedtime, road trips, travel etc, and as is a lovely way to spend cosy, quiet time with them. I do it for my own enjoyment as much as theirs.
Only trouble is, they seem to be less keen on reading on their own, especially my 9 year old. He much prefers listening to me and it is a battle to get him to read on his own for pleasure, even though he is an excellent reader.
Am I being slightly selfish? I know at my age, my head was constantly in a book...maybe I am taking over too much...

Siwi Thu 31-Dec-15 13:07:01

Absolutely, totally nu.

starry0ne Thu 31-Dec-15 13:09:21

Nothing wrong with what you are doing..However with my 8 year old he reads a chapter then I do them same....It seems to be worth a shot

SchnitzelVonKrumm Thu 31-Dec-15 13:16:49

As my children get older I often read something more challenging to them than they'd read themselves (they are real bookworms now, even DD2 who really struggled to learn to read). Often they read a chapter ahead, then I read it aloud and explain any words/phrases/concepts they are unfamiliar with.

RaskolnikovsGarret Thu 31-Dec-15 13:18:23

My DDs read proper chapter books fluently before they started school. I still read to them in the past at bedtime at 13 and 11. shockblush We all loved it!

quirkychick Thu 31-Dec-15 13:19:13

Still read to Dd1 (10). I agree that I read something a bit more challenging, or reread something she has read but found tricky, at her request. Dd1 is an excellent reader and reading and discussing harder books is really a joy.

Yanbu

magicroundabouts Thu 31-Dec-15 13:20:11

Oh don't stop. This quote from Laura Markham (aha parenting) sums it up for me

"I know she can read anything herself now. But why give up such an important time to connect with each other emotionally? Why give up the chance to read books that trigger good discussions about values and choices and hardships and hope? Don’t stop till she fires you."

Enb76 Thu 31-Dec-15 13:21:39

I intend to carry on reading to my child until she tells me to stop. I tend to read more challenging books to her than she reads for herself. She is 7 so while she is reading David Walliams and Roald Dahl and the like, I am reading her Children of the New Forest, Swallows and Amazons etc... It is proven that reading to your child is a good thing. Carry on happily.

TimeToMuskUp Thu 31-Dec-15 13:21:43

NBU at all. DS1 is 10 and a fantastic reader but I still read to him most evenings. It's not even the story or the reading which matter, but spending time one-to-one with him (we also have a delinquent 4yo so time with DS1 is valuable).

SchnitzelVonKrumm Thu 31-Dec-15 13:21:55

DD1 (just turned 12) was reading chapter books in reception, DD2 (9) couldn't read a word until year 2 but now has her nose in a book almost constantly, DS 6 can read well enough but is really lazy about it. They all love being read to!

BoboChic Thu 31-Dec-15 13:24:22

Sharing and discussing good stories is an incredibly powerful way of bonding with your family. Reading to your DC is one way of doing this. There is no reason to stop!

PrincessHairyMclary Thu 31-Dec-15 13:26:20

DD (6) and I take turns now that she can read well and as she gets older we will continue.

I work as a TA at Secondary school and I think it's really important that you keep reading to them. They will still come across words that they don't understand and instead of skipping over them you can explain what it is or encourage them to look it up. It also helps massively with pronunciation and inflection. Lots of the students I work with in English even those without SEN read through punctuation instead of taking notice of it.

You can help them develop their analytical skills which many struggle with; point out metaphors, similes,rhetorical questions , the mood of the piece, ask them how the characters are feeling etc and why did the author write it like that. Just because they are no longer in primary school doesn't mean it doesn't help to have an adult look at the text with you and analyse it a bit.

songbird Thu 31-Dec-15 13:27:19

Another one here still reading aloud to 10 year old DD. We all love it. She's a very strong reader but as PPs have said, it's such a lovely bonding time, especially now we're reading more challenging stuff.

MrsRolly Thu 31-Dec-15 13:27:26

No! I'm never going to stop (well until she's forcing me out screaming muuuuumm!!)
She's 9 an amazing reader but loves being read to, we are reading Harry Potter (book 5 at the moment) I read it to her, she reads it herself then we watch the films. Sharing books with her has been way up there in my favourite parenting perks. My DH also has a book on the go with her for nights I'm not in etc.

They read when they want to NBU at all. smile

Hissy Thu 31-Dec-15 13:32:12

Some research I read said that the single most important thing a parent can do for their child is to read to them. It enables vocabulary enhancement and allows their imagination to fly when they are listening to a story in a different way to when they are reading to themselves.

BathshebaDarkstone Thu 31-Dec-15 13:33:46

DD 8 decided last year that she didn't want me to read to her ever again. sad You can read to your DC long after they can read themselves, read slightly more difficult books. smile

Gruach Thu 31-Dec-15 13:34:07

I have promised to carry on reading to the teenager when he's at university.

Don't stop! Share the reading aloud between you. Apart from the sheer fun of it there's no better way to keep track of a child's understanding.

ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs Thu 31-Dec-15 13:35:37

Nope! I still read to my 3 , aged 12, 10 and 8, and it's a lovely close time. Doesn't stop my 2 dd's devouring books on their own, and makes my son more inclined to read himself, I feel, as he realises that reading= fun.

kaitlinktm Thu 31-Dec-15 13:36:32

Please don't stop! I read to mine as long as they wanted me to. One loved reading but the other not so much - work that out if you can! wink

I remember feeling sad when my parents stopped reading to me because I could now read myself - as if it had just been a chore to them. Well maybe it had. My mother is definitely not fond of reading for pleasure although my father is. They even got me to read to my brother who was only 17 months younger than me. I love reading now but he hardly reads at all.

Read to them for as long as they want you to - they will grow out of it soon enough (too soon for you no doubt). grin

AppleSetsSail Thu 31-Dec-15 13:36:58

Obviously, any kind of reading = good. You might consider sitting next to them reading the same book and discussing it every chapter or so. This is what I do with my 10 year old who is not quite as voracious a reader as I would like.

VintageDresses Thu 31-Dec-15 13:37:13

I read to both of fine from when they were tiny to about 11yo.

Ds1 always loved reading himself and did that on top of the reading I did.

Ds2 was a much more reluctant reader and didn't pick up a book unless he was forced to until about 9-10yo

Last year, aged 11 he spent his Christmas money on a kindle that has barely been put down and this year he's had Kindle Unlimited as a present.

You're doing completely the right thing and it will come

shouldwestayorshouldwego Thu 31-Dec-15 13:40:02

We still read with dc. Usually they read a bit then I read a bit, will sometimes leave it mid chapter and leave them to read by themselves to the end of chapter then sneak in and read to end of chapter myself to see what happens

BlackeyedShepherdsbringsheep Thu 31-Dec-15 14:01:44

it is good for them to be read aloud to. except I hate it so don't

Guiltypleasures001 Thu 31-Dec-15 17:40:23

Hi op I echo some of the other posters on here

I read to my son till he was around 11 because he like it, it was snuggle time just us so too speak.
I also got him to read parts of the story and had mini discussions on content.

I see loads of kids that would have done so much better in their short lives if they could have had this experience, do carry on thanks

TinklyLittleLaugh Thu 31-Dec-15 17:51:00

DS1 was a reluctant reader and I read to him until he was 11. He is 22 now and enjoys a good book.

DD2 on the other hand, wanted to read to herself from age 7 or so. She is a 16 now, doing English Lit A level and a very keen reader.

Although it's lovely to read to them, I think you have to be child led on the stopping time.

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