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AIBU to think that this is completely weird?

(201 Posts)
whyistherumgone Tue 29-Dec-15 23:14:31

OK, before I start I know this is going to sound like I'm trolling but I absolutely promise this is for real.
My cousin and I have been whatsapping tonight - she's just bought a house with her DP having never lived together before and we often end up having chats about those annoying habits you discover when you move in together.
Tonight she mentioned that one thing has happened and she can't get her head around it and doesn't know how to tackle it with DP, whether to bring it up or just leave it so wanted my advice. I'm afraid I'm just slightly agog and can offer no explanation but have her full permission to post here to see if anyone else has any gems to offer...

DP is out and she was tidying up the bedroom. She opened his top drawer to put some socks away and found a ziplock bag....full of what can only be (her words) neatly trimmed pubic hair. Just resting on top of the socks. The dustpan and brush was sitting on top of his chest of drawers. She's a bit freaked out by the whole thing - why didn't he just flush it or throw it away?it's mainly the effort of having swept it into the bag that's bothering her, I mean why keep it?? She feels like she should bring it up but isn't sure how... I think she should leave the bag on top of the drawers so it's visible and see what he does...

Any ideas? I have to admit I'm been torn between laughing like a complete loon and complete bafflement. We've now had a few glasses of wine between us and the whatsapps are becoming completely hysterical. Do join us with any wisdom you can offer.

LavenderRain Tue 29-Dec-15 23:17:38

Is he bald?? Maybe he's saving it up to make a wig grin

teenmumandsowhat Tue 29-Dec-15 23:18:39

Some kind of weird fetish? hmm

AnchorDownDeepBreath Tue 29-Dec-15 23:19:06

Reminds me of pube pizza from Jackass, I think it was?


WorraLiberty Tue 29-Dec-15 23:19:19

"Oi love. Why have you got a bag of pubes in your drawer"?

Job done.

Why would you buy a house with someone who you can't ask a simple question? confused

whyistherumgone Tue 29-Dec-15 23:19:30

Didn't think of that one! No he has a full head of (very well groomed) hair. Maybe he's just very particular with his grooming?

OhRayRay Tue 29-Dec-15 23:20:27

Maybe he wants to make a fake beard with it? Oooh, or big bushy eyebrows!

Champagneformyrealfriends Tue 29-Dec-15 23:21:48

Worra my thoughts exactly grin my OH can't leave a tissue anywhere in our room without me teasing him!

slightlyglitterpaned Tue 29-Dec-15 23:21:57

Is he a goblin? Terry Pratchett's goblins have special little pots to collect things like toenail clippings, earwax etc.

whyistherumgone Tue 29-Dec-15 23:22:12

WorraLiberty - very true. I did suggest just coming out with it but I suspect that it has become a huge deal in her head now as we've turned it into a guessing game been discussing it in such depth
Direct is probably the best approach.

Muddlewitch Tue 29-Dec-15 23:24:05

Is he neatly trimmed down there? is it definitely his

sugar21 Tue 29-Dec-15 23:25:11

He's going to have a pubic wig made from the real stuff and sell it and maybe further offerings on pube bay

whyistherumgone Tue 29-Dec-15 23:25:40

Muddle shock hadn't even thought about the possibility that it might be someone elses.
She's pretty sure tho - found some on the toilet seat in a line a few weeks after they there's definitely something odd going on with the pube grooming.

ItsMyFuckingWedding Tue 29-Dec-15 23:25:59

Maybe he is making voodoo dolls and that's their hair?

Bellyrub1980 Tue 29-Dec-15 23:26:07

Definitely HIS pubes???

Please tell us the outcome

Bellyrub1980 Tue 29-Dec-15 23:26:33

Sorry X posted there

whyistherumgone Tue 29-Dec-15 23:26:37

probably should have mentioned that in the original post too grin

whyistherumgone Tue 29-Dec-15 23:27:40

She's just messaged to say she's going to ask him outright when he comes in (or in the morning if it's really late) as she doesn't want there to be "consistent pube problems around the house"
I'm not even going to try to pretend I'm not laughing now.

Bellyrub1980 Tue 29-Dec-15 23:27:54

Maybe he doesn't want to put them down the toilet, so is economising on plastic bags and waiting till he fills one up before throwing it out!??

Vedamakesthebesttoast Tue 29-Dec-15 23:30:03

Maybe they're hers hmm is he planning on making a mini pube voodoo doll of her and... Well even I'm baffled as to how to finish off that train of thought (maybe I should put the wine in the fridge and save the rest of the bottle for tomorrow...)

Muddlewitch Tue 29-Dec-15 23:30:29

In a line on the toilet seat? Like a little pube arrangement to brighten up the new bathroom? grin

I think she needs to sneak extra things into the bag and see if he mentions it...a bit of glitter here, a plastic spider there, perhaps the odd fake hair extension..

BillMurrey Tue 29-Dec-15 23:30:43

Isn't this a symptom of OCD? I've heard of it before with toenail clippings, I'm sure.

SaucyJack Tue 29-Dec-15 23:30:46

He's probably going to kill her, pull her insides out through her bumhole, then re-stuff her with pube trimmings and turn her into a cushion.

Vedamakesthebesttoast Tue 29-Dec-15 23:30:47

X posts!

AlisonWunderland Tue 29-Dec-15 23:31:57

He's saving it up to go to Build a Bear, and he's going to use it to stuff a pink teddy for her valentines day gift.

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