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My girlfriend stopped taking the pill without telling me

(152 Posts)
PhallicGiraffe Mon 28-Dec-15 16:06:19

I just found out that my girlfriend of 14 months, after asking her, didnt renew her pills for birth control round about mid-November. We've had lots of sex since. When I asked her why, she 'wanted to see how I'd react'.
We've talked about kids, and we've both agreed we want them, but not right now. AIBU to want to run for the hills?
P.s. As a bloke, wanting a female perspective.

BitchPeas Mon 28-Dec-15 16:07:22

Yes run. No way back from this IMO.

Christmascheerful Mon 28-Dec-15 16:07:51

Contraception should always be discussed and agreed upon by both parties so yanbu that she didn't consult you HOWEVER it's not her sole responsibility... If your not ready for kids you should be doing your part also eg condoms.

bittapitta Mon 28-Dec-15 16:07:54

Yanbu - you should leave, it's a huge break of trust. If you do choose to have sex again, use condoms you provided.

OddSocksHighHeels Mon 28-Dec-15 16:08:08

Yes run. That's not on.

AnyFucker Mon 28-Dec-15 16:08:20

That is completely out of order.

Is she pregnant already ?

I suggest you completely stop sleeping with her. Like, forever.

Phalenopsisgirl Mon 28-Dec-15 16:09:22

No you aren't, time to start taking your contraception in your own hands.

PhallicGiraffe Mon 28-Dec-15 16:10:00

She isn't pregnant as far as I know.

ThreeRuddyTubs Mon 28-Dec-15 16:10:02

Yep absolutely that's a massive breach of your trust

RubbleBubble00 Mon 28-Dec-15 16:10:26

would be a deal breaker for me. I'd cut and run. How can you ever trust her again.

MegaClutterSlut Mon 28-Dec-15 16:11:02

Yes I would run! She's shown herself to be a real big untrustworthy sly -- bitch-- person. I wouldn't be able to ever trust anything she says/does again

Branleuse Mon 28-Dec-15 16:11:09

yeah id definitly leave, but shes probably already pregnant

HamaTime Mon 28-Dec-15 16:12:21

I'd run. Apart from the fact that you can't trust her, 'to see how you would react' is weird as fuck.

MrsTerryPratchett Mon 28-Dec-15 16:12:22

Dreadful. Cut and run.

But in future, use condoms or don't have sex if you don't want kids.

PuntasticUsername Mon 28-Dec-15 16:12:44

Wow, yes, that's awful. I wouldn't want to be with someone any more, if I found that they thought it was ok to treat me that way.

londonrach Mon 28-Dec-15 16:13:10

This should have been discussed. Personally if i was a man id run for the hills as how could you trust her now. Roles reversed id never ever do that!

Norest Mon 28-Dec-15 16:13:25

Yea RUN. What does it say about her respect for you generally if she is willing to lie about such a thing?

MegaClutterSlut Mon 28-Dec-15 16:13:39

If she could lie about that, just think if what else she's capable of lying about. Huge deal breaker

Enjolrass Mon 28-Dec-15 16:16:10

There is no way back from this.

Contraception is a joint responsibility. If you discussed it and both were happy with the pill and she changed her mind and didn't tell you, she is in the wrong.

I wouldn't trust her again

TheSquashyHatofMrGnosspelius Mon 28-Dec-15 16:16:52

Wouldn't see my arse for dust OP. Massive no no.

catfordbetty Mon 28-Dec-15 16:17:03

she 'wanted to see how I'd react'

That's bloody weird, IMO. Have you asked her what she hoped your reaction would be? Also, yes, end it now; 14 months is not enough investment to make this relationship worth saving.

Junosmum Mon 28-Dec-15 16:17:06

Run for the hills.

As a couple contraception should be discussed and i she wanted to stop taking the pill she needed to discuss this with you so you could consider alternative contraceptives or starting a family.

Even if she is pregnant I'd leave - it was underhand, weird and a total breech of trust. You can support a child perfectly well without being a relationship with the mother.

I'd never do this to my partner (I'm a woman).

mintoil Mon 28-Dec-15 16:17:34

This is why I am always telling DS to wear at least one condoms even if a girl says she is on the pill.

Hopefully you will have learned your lesson without there being an unwanted baby as a result. Yes - as PP have said I would ditch her.

ollieplimsoles Mon 28-Dec-15 16:17:53

Another one saying dump her. What a horrible way to treat you and she sounds immature as fuck

P1nkP0ppy Mon 28-Dec-15 16:18:03

Keep your fingers crossed that she isn't pregnant then run as fast as you can.
No brainer, run.

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