To break into the farm down the road

[B33rTricksPott3r]

I have always wanted to see if it's true that all the animals kneel down at midnight.

I have wellies and a flask of Prosecco

[B33rTricksPott3r]

Just need to find the batteries for the torch. There's a wind up lantern in the cottage but the whirring sound might alert the animals to my presence and alter their behaviour.

[4yoniD]

The version I heard was that the cattle bowed down at midnight but any human seeing it instantly died.

So how did it become a story?

I trust your version doesn't include instant death...

[B33rTricksPott3r]

They didn't include that bit at my naice Church Primary

[B33rTricksPott3r]

We were told that the original Bethlehem animals bowed at Jesus's birth and hence so do all the animals in byres ever since.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

I heard a superstition that you can't watch a goat for a whole day and night because they have to go and suckle the Devil. If you could put that on your farm-watch schedule, I'd love to know.

[B33rTricksPott3r]

I don't think I'll have time, MrsTP. Our schedule includes bracing walks up hills and I think DH would think that was a shit excuse to sit on a bale of hay and crochet while keeping an eye on a goat.

[londonrach]

Knew the animals kneed down but never heard of the death bit. Thought everyone know that! . Op you know you need to prove this story is true.

[Elllicam]

If you could get a picture of the goat suckling the devil it would be a hell of a breastfeeding meme.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

Pfft, well clearly I'm ever going to get to it. I bet goats don't kneel either, contrary buggers.

[B33rTricksPott3r]

Will this do?
I wouldn't like to attract unwanted attention from bulls. Or farmers.

[londonrach]

Think you might have some problems with the bull looking like that!

[B33rTricksPott3r]

Goats are misunderstood. They are just like big Labradors with weird eyes.

[IndomitabIe]

These are Dutch cattle, but you can watch them from your sofa.

[GreatFuckability]

Ah if I'd known I'd have asked the guy with the horses head on the bus this afternoon if I could borrow it!

[MimsyBorogroves]

If OP makes this a "don't return to thread" thread, we will all shit ourselves.

[B33rTricksPott3r]

An actual CowCam? Wow! Whatever will they think of next.

[HirplesWithHaggis]

If it helps any, I have a byre full of calves on my doorstep (and sheep in the nearest field). I could nip out at midnight and check, saving you the trauchle uphill in wellies?

[B33rTricksPott3r]

Yep, they can, usual. That one is faceplanting the grass.

[OddSocksHighHeels]

I've never heard this

Was the goat one made up to see how many idiots would spend a 24 hour period watching a goat? Which bit of the devil do they suckle from? I have so many questions.