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AIBU - or was this GP uneccessarily short with m?

(67 Posts)
VeganCanBeFabulous Thu 24-Dec-15 09:07:24

I suspect I am being unreasonable and yes I know GPs are overworked and it's the run up to Christmas etc etc but this appointment has left a sour taste in my mouth and I'm not sure why.

I took my daughter to the GP yesterday because I suspect she has a mild urine infection. She is 2.5 and still wears nappies and her wet nappies have been quite smelly for the last few days. I have been extra meticulous and making sure she is properly clean and she has a bath every other night and an "important areas" wash on the off nights so it seemed likely the smell was actually urine rather than something external. Then yesterday morning she said "Mummy done a wee" and had a pained expression on her face so I said "is your wee hurting you?" And she said yes. So I made an appointment with the GP and then spent the whole bloody morning trying to get her to sit on the potty to get a sample and sent DH to get a pot from the doctor's.

When we got there he was very abrupt and said "here again are we?" I just smiled and said yes and he rolled his eyes a bit. I said I thought DD had a UTI and he said "well UTIs are actually very rare in children this age and they are something we take very seriously. Then he asked why I thought she had one and I gave him the above info. He sighed and said well I can't just treat blindly! We'll need a sample (in a manner than suggested I was an idiot or just desperate for antibiotics). I then gave him the sample I had brought and he sighed again and said well this will have to go off to the lab, it will take a few days. His manner was as though I was a massive time-waster. I said that she had had a UTI before and DH had brought her and they had just dipped her wee there and then, but he said they'd have to send it off for proper tests.

So as not to drip feed, my daughter has been to the GP a fair bit but no more than other toddlers I know! She had thrush under her arm recently which had to be treated with canesten but was initially misdiagnosed so it took a while to get the right treatment. She has had the odd bug - she had croup as a young baby and has had a chest infection since then. She broke her leg a year ago (she sat on DH's lap on a slide and her leg got caught underneath him) which was awful and we felt terrible about it but it was clearly an accident.

I was just surprised by his suggestion that we were there all the time and that I was time wasting. I am a nurse so only take my kids when there is something I can't deal with myself and I don't feel like my children are ill more than other children their age. Also I'm not sure what he meant by taking the UTI very seriously in children her age. I can't explain why but it really felt like an admonishment. She is always clean, drinks plenty and only water or milk, eats a good healthy diet, gets plenty of sleep. I'm not sure what more I should be doing to avoid illness! So am I being unreasonable or over sensitive or was this guy a bit off? Congrats if you made it this far - sorry for the novel!

GP sounds like an arse! YANBU.

SummerNights1986 Thu 24-Dec-15 09:13:00


I've had a couple of urine infections over the past few months and my sample has always been dipped and tested there and then. I can't see why they would send it off.

Some people are knobs regardless of job title. Sounds like this was one of them.

ProfessorPreciseaBug Thu 24-Dec-15 09:13:26

I once asked my GP about time wasters.. He sad that about a third of appointments were not necessary.

I am not making excuses but it could be difficult to tell the difference between a time waster and someone who does have a lot of genuine health issues.

MartinRohdesBellybuttonFluff Thu 24-Dec-15 09:14:59

Ignore, he sounds as if he was very rude, maybe he was having a shit day but that's no excuse for taking it out on you.

I think you did the right thing. I find most docs really take a mother's instinct on board. You did what you thought was right.

Hope the results of the test show up nothing anyway, better to be sure, and I hope you little girl is back to normal

VeganCanBeFabulous Thu 24-Dec-15 09:16:23

Yeah I suppose that's fair Professor and in my job I do see a lot of people who don't understand what effect time wasting had - e.g people who just don't bother to turn up for their operations and are uncontactable meaning a while theatre team including surgeon and anaesthetist are standing around waiting to see if they'll deign to turn up. BUT I do always try to give people the benefit of the doubt first!

Arfarfanarf Thu 24-Dec-15 09:16:58

Its hard to say because a lot depends on tone but i think if you felt he was off, he likely was. People can normally tell.

I imagine the uti serious thing was child protection but i am surprised he'd say that because i always thought utis were quite common in small children because of nappies and them sticking their grubby, muddy, snotty little hands down them at every opportunity. grin

SummerNights1986 Thu 24-Dec-15 09:18:04

I can believe the figure about a third of appointments not being necessary...but I suppose would also question your (general your) definition of necessary.

I don'tt rush to the GP for everything but I can think of a few occasions over the years where one of us has had an appointment and have come away with a 'it's fine/see how it goes/no treatment needed'. I suppose you could class those as 'unnecessary' but you don't know until you go iyswim?

VeganCanBeFabulous Thu 24-Dec-15 09:19:23

I did wonder if he meant a child protection issue - made me go cold to think of it.

YouTheCat Thu 24-Dec-15 09:21:44

If she's had thrush recently, even if it wasn't in the same place, do you think she might have that rather than a uti?

The smell could be due to that.

MrsBobDylan Thu 24-Dec-15 09:30:29

It's not up to him to tell you how often you should/shouldn't see the Dr.He's an idiot -ignore!

JimmyGreavesMoustache Thu 24-Dec-15 09:37:18

i don't think the UTi thing is about child protection
UTI, especially more than one, in young children can be an indication of serious kidney problems. certainly when my 2yo had repeated UTI we were referred to hospital for a number of tests, scans etc, and there was not a whiff of a child protection referral.

i think this GP sounds OTT. Your daughter had symptoms, you were concerned, you did the right thing by bringing her in. If it turns out she doesn't have a UTI that doesn't mean you're a timewaster - it is his job to diagnose, not yours.

Ipsos Thu 24-Dec-15 09:47:53

I'd see someone else next time. He doesn't sound helpful.

NoahVale Thu 24-Dec-15 09:52:48

i thought if children have quite a few UTIs they then have to do a kidney ultrasound.
i spect he was having a bad day. very rude of him, this is what puts me off going to GP, the fear of their rudeness and implying that I am time wasting.

SmellyHead Thu 24-Dec-15 09:55:44

Diptesting the urine in the surgery is not a replacement for sending it to the lab for culturing. I am surprised if he didn't dip it before sending it off though (it would show leucocytes, protein, blood traces and indicate if there might be something). UTIs in little kids get heavily investigated for possible kidney problems, I would think that's what he meant.

1frenchfoodie Thu 24-Dec-15 09:56:55

I think he only mentioned taking UTIs in children seriously to reassure you that if it were the case he'd act swiftly.

NoahVale Thu 24-Dec-15 09:57:28

perhaps he was sighing because of the time constraints of the lab, perhaps you have missed the lab courier.
perhaps it was the previous patient to you that irritated him.

my GP once told me that excess sugar sometimes makes the dc wee more/be smelly.
perhaps your DD is too clean there, ? does she have bubble bath?

moopymoodle Thu 24-Dec-15 10:01:43

GP is a prick. A GP did this to me for taking my then newborn son in for lumps on his neck. He said it was normal and I was being a neurotic new mum.. The cheek!

A friend of mine took her son in for a bad cough, it didn't go away and she went back 2 more times as she felt he deteriorated. She was then treat pretty much how you described you was. Her poor boy died at home the same day as it turned out to be something serious.

Imo doctors are too quick to make people feel like they shouldn't be there!

MeAndTheMajor Thu 24-Dec-15 10:03:46

I agree with the previous posters - I doubt the GP meant a child protection issue. One of my DDs spent a few nights in hospital with a UTI when she was small. She had all sort of follow up tests and scans in the following months in order to rule out kidney and bladder problems. I'm sure that's what he meant about taking UTIs seriously in small children.

littledrummergirl Thu 24-Dec-15 10:07:14

Yabu for going to the gp instead of the nurse practitioner for this. Doubly so being a nurse yourself.

80schild Thu 24-Dec-15 10:09:06

YANBU for the fact he was horrible. However in his defence he did need to send the sample to the lab (so he knows what antibiotics to prescribe) and he is right to take it seriously, as UTIs can lead to kidney problems. Did he at least give you a general antibiotic?

80schild Thu 24-Dec-15 10:11:20

I agree with that completely moo pie - I know there are a lot of people suffering from health anxiety but out of all of those people I am sure that 50% of people probably do have something wrong with them just that GPs don't know or can't be bothered to find out what.

AwfulCuntForTheButter Thu 24-Dec-15 10:12:35

My 16mo DS always gets really strong smelling wee when he's teething - the ammonia stench is unbelievable, even though he's well hydrated, so is there a chance it could be something similar with your DD?

My surgery doesn't even offer appointments for UTIs - they get you to provide a sample, complete a form outlining your symptoms, then call you with the results in the afternoon or the following morning, depending when you dropped the sample off. They also have a prescription waiting for you at the reception desk.

YANBU, OP - you shouldn't be criticised by a GP for taking her in when she's in obvious discomfort. If you DIDN'T take her in, you'd be knocked for that too. It's a no win situation sometimes flowers

VeganCanBeFabulous Thu 24-Dec-15 10:13:41

Fair enough Little, you are probably right. To be honest it didn't occur to me which seems ridiculous now. Just wanted to get it sorted as quickly as poss and get on with our Christmas and didn't think about the options. I will definitely consider the nurse practitioner next time - more likelihood of him/her not speaking to me I'm an arsehole.

thelittleredhen Thu 24-Dec-15 10:15:00

My friend's DD had lots of UTIs when she was younger, it was awful and remember her stories about spending ages trying to get urine samples - it was a really tough time.

I'd ask to see a different GP in future, he does sound like an arse, and you don't need that.

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