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Do you have punishment for swearing?

(66 Posts)
usernamesandgingerbreads Wed 23-Dec-15 13:14:54

DD (13) has just screamed that someone on tv stealing a goose on a Christmas film is a massive cunt blush
My Dad will go beserk if he hears her swear.

schokolade Wed 23-Dec-15 13:42:05

I'd tell her I didn't want to hear it thanks. And get stronger if it kept happening.

schokolade Wed 23-Dec-15 13:44:02

And maybe it wouldn't be so bad if your dad did go beserk? I guess she'd learn there's a time and a place. smile

CreepingDogFart Wed 23-Dec-15 13:44:34

How did you react ?

GnomeDePlume Wed 23-Dec-15 13:45:04

No but I dont have an issue with swearing per se.

I would however have a discussion with her about the appropriateness of swearing in different settings. I love a good swear but would not swear, say, in front of small children (or here on MN funnily enough).

Talk with her about when and where swearing is good/okay/iffy/wrong. It is a useful life skill.

catfordbetty Wed 23-Dec-15 13:45:24

Spare the rod ...

B33rTricksPott3r Wed 23-Dec-15 13:46:57

Swearing at me or anyone else is a sanction (loss of screen time etc).
Swearing in general is a reminder how it can make you look to other people, time and a place etc, particularly the word cunt.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Wed 23-Dec-15 13:49:24

I'd be really cross , we didn't swear [or tried very hard not to] in front of the ds's when they were younger and if one of mine said cunt at 13 I'd have been shock.

I'd not punish as such unless it was aimed at me, family etc but there'd be a
chat about swearing and where ,when etc.

GnomeDePlume Wed 23-Dec-15 13:57:18

StillStayingClassySanDiego so that particular swear word offends but you would be okay(ish) with slang for male genitalia?

Actually, I would be tempted to go through (and make her write down) every single swear word she knows (then add all the ones you know wink) and make a set of columns next to these

Parents
Friends
Strangers
Grandparents etc

Then go through with her which would be good/okay/iffy/wrong to be used in each column.

Apart from taking the forbidden/shock value out of the swearing it would also be an opportunity to guide.

AutumnLeavesArePretty Wed 23-Dec-15 13:59:01

Yes, there would be sanctions and harsh ones. I won't have swearing in the house, there are millions of words that can be used so no reason to resort to vulgar ones.

DropYourSword Wed 23-Dec-15 14:07:38

OP, what the relevance of your Dad going berserk? It's fine for you and your DDs Dad to decide what's appropriate or not, and the consequences for breaking rules. But you choose how you raise your child, right?

and I think the goose thief does sound like a massive cunt

StillStayingClassySanDiego Wed 23-Dec-15 14:13:11

Gmome can't say I'd be happy at any swearing from my then 13 year old ds's, not just cunt; twat, fuck , etc would make me have words with them.

goodnightdarthvader1 Wed 23-Dec-15 14:14:31

Swearing at me or anyone else is a sanction (loss of screen time etc).
Swearing in general is a reminder how it can make you look to other people, time and a place etc, particularly the word cunt.

Agreed.

Branleuse Wed 23-Dec-15 14:15:26

i would tell her that if she swears like that in front of your parents or adults there will be hell to pay.

I tell mine off for swearing but i dont actually punish it

Branleuse Wed 23-Dec-15 14:16:06

i mean I dont actually think its a massive deal, but I do want them to know that its not always appropriate

usernamesandgingerbreads Wed 23-Dec-15 14:16:49

She's never sworn at home before so I was a bit taken back. I'm under no illusion that she swears at school.
Cunt is an awful word though.

My Dad is very very old fashioned in a lot of ways. Anything more than bloody and you are in trouble and he doesn't even like bloody tbh.

Sallyhasleftthebuilding Wed 23-Dec-15 14:20:07

They get a `Not in this house` warning. Swearing at me/others is definately not on, swearing when hurt, I let go.

DS y5 teacher made them all write swear words dowm on a piece of paper - and screwed it up ... Lovely!!
DS learnt something new that day!!!

FlatOnTheHill Wed 23-Dec-15 14:25:42

Oh gawd. Did you secretly laugh?

TheSecondOfHerName Wed 23-Dec-15 14:29:26

I make them explain to me what the word means. Slightly embarrassing for me, excruciating for them. This mostly worked in that it did curtail the swearing.

TheSecondOfHerName Wed 23-Dec-15 14:30:37

Does anyone remember that episode of Malcolm in the Middle, where his dad makes him read out an extensive list of swearwords while looking him in the eye?

PolterGoose Wed 23-Dec-15 14:36:32

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

knobblyknee Wed 23-Dec-15 14:38:21

Doesnt bother me, son had autistic friends at school. We talked about how Gran feels differently and he chose to change his language in front of her.

nokidshere Wed 23-Dec-15 14:39:26

No punishment here but no swearing in the house or in front of adults. I would definitely go with the suggestion of talking about when it's not appropriate.

UninventiveUsername Wed 23-Dec-15 14:45:54

My mum would have gone nuts if she heard me say cunt! I've sworn in front of her once in many life and that was at her because she'd really upset me. I don't see swearing as that big a deal myself but it isn't something I'd encourage in my dd and I would punish her I think depending on the circumstances. I think it is important for children to learn that swearing is not always appropriate and that not everyone likes to hear it. My dd is not yet two so I may change my views as she gets older. I like the idea of making her explain what the words mean though.

UninventiveUsername Wed 23-Dec-15 14:46:35

Once in many life? "Once in my life", that should say!

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