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AIBU?

When you give something away for free, FOR FREE on Facebook, and they don't turn up and then ask if you can deliver. Quite lighthearted, although ragey too

114 replies

NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 17/12/2015 12:22

It's a cushion for an Ikea Poang chair. Nothing very exciting, but it seemed a shame for dh to take it to the tip when he went last weekend. So I offered it for free on the local Facebook. Straightaway, a woman said she wanted it. She could pick up today, which is my day off. She wasn't sure what time but it would definitely be morning after 10.30 and she'd let me know.

I just messaged her to ask what time to expect her. Quite a lot to do today what with it being my last free day off before Christmas and having a toddler with an extensive social schedule.

'Oh s*' she replies, 'I forgot. Can you deliver it to me? I'm in x location'.

Ffs! Grrr! No I bloody can't. It's the week before Christmas and x location is a good 10 miles away on the other side of town. Plus I'm giving it away for free. Dh was going to take it to the tip last weekend but instead it's been sitting in my hallway ever since.

Tell me your Facebook giving away stuff for free outrages. I need to know if I'm being a little bit irrational (8 months pregnant so hormones are doing funny things), or if my rage is justified.

And breathe.

OP posts:
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TheWitTank · 17/12/2015 12:24

YANBU. I see this all the time on selling sites, it's so cheeky. What did she say when you said no?

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NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 17/12/2015 12:28

She said she could only apologise. She's been really busy (ME TOO!!) and her mum could maybe collect it over the next few days, or I could feel free to take it to the tip if I preferred.

I don't really fancy driving all the way to the tip (WHERE DH WENT LAST WEEK) with one cushion.

I haven't replied. The shouty capitals I just used have made me feel a bit better Grin

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Thurlow · 17/12/2015 12:29

YANBU! That's so rude - it's free!

I'd message her back saying if she can't come and collect it then you'll have to put it back online.

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vladthedisorganised · 17/12/2015 12:30

This is the reason I stopped doing Freecycle: of all the things I offered for free, only one person actually turned up to collect as promised, everything else became 'ooh, can you bring it to massively inconvenient location at hugely inconvenient time? I'm doing you a favour by taking it off your hands after all!"

YADNBU.

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CallieTorres · 17/12/2015 12:32

i advertised some of my DCs toys, and one fucking woman... "will you do it all for free?" type questions, no i fucking wont, piss off

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chopsychoo · 17/12/2015 12:37

I actually came on here to check you weren't my best friend she's literally just text me a similar shouty text about fb selling pages. If I have something like that to get rid if I usually stick in on eBay for 99p people get very excited about winning things that cheaply and rush to pick it up. Win win

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NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 17/12/2015 12:48

I might do that. Or I might chop it into little pieces and feed it into the wheelie bin fortnight by fortnight, whenever there is space until it's all gone.

Angry

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chopsychoo · 17/12/2015 12:54

Are there any charity shops locally that would collect it? Chopping it to pieces sounds immensely satisfying though I'd be inclined to go for that option!

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IamCarcass · 17/12/2015 12:55

I just came on to see if you were one of my local fb group members, three groups and all have Free Giveaways rage, from non collection, abusive messages to someone turning up in a nice car who 'obvs don't need free stuff' . I hope the free stuff continues, the drama brings the groups much joy.

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TheMaddHugger · 17/12/2015 12:55

I'm ((((((((((((Hugging )))))))))))))) You but also lol I've seen this exact thing happen many times

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TheWitTank · 17/12/2015 12:59

I chopped a knackered old sofa to bits in the garden with an axe once. I felt like I was in the film "300". Do it.

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Monstermuncher · 17/12/2015 13:03

Oh that gives me the rage as well. I don't actually offer things for free anymore on freecycle and gumtree because people are so rubbish but will sell for a very small amount of a pound or so. I've found doing it this way increases the chance that someone will actually turn up when they say they will. Some people are so ruddy cheeky

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DinosaursRoar · 17/12/2015 13:05

put it back online for free again.

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BarbaraofSeville · 17/12/2015 13:11

It's stories like this that remind me why I don't bother with Freecycle or giving stuff away on Facebook.

I sell somethings on eBay if it's worth it, but otherwise it goes in the tip. It gives me massive guilt to throw usable stuff in landfill but I simply Do. Not. Have. The. Energy. to deal with people like this.

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SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 17/12/2015 13:13

YANBU. It drives me crazy.

In a similar vain, there's a local woman who often posts on a local FB selling page asking for free stuff. Most recently, it was a welsh dresser. Post said;

Is anyone giving away a welsh dresser? Must be able to deliver to XX. TIA.

One reply saying that they have one for sale for £50 & can deliver for fuel costs (she lives rurally, so my no means unreasonable).

Her reply: "No, I said free."

It's fine for people to ask for something advertised for free - indeed that's what the advertiser wants. I also have no problem with people asking if anyone is giving away essential items which they need but can't afford (pram, car seat, pushchair etc.) - so long as they don't then reject the kindly offered blue pram because they "need one for a girl" or similar.

Unfortunately though, the world is full of piss takers.

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SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 17/12/2015 13:14

by no means unreasonable.

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cherrytree63 · 17/12/2015 13:15

Someone advertised a free item on a local FB page, a woman said she wanted it. I posted to say if the first responder didn't take it for any reason, could I have it.
I then got a ranty pm from the woman about how she needed it, her life is terrible, she has no money, four kids, one disabled, bla bla bla....
And a second pm asking me to pick the item up and deliver it to her Hmm

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Puzzledandpissedoff · 17/12/2015 13:19

Tell me about it Angry When I cleared my late father's house I waited around time and again for Freecyclers who didn't turn up; none had the courtesy even to let me know they couldn't make it

I finally stopped using the site when the last person who "forgot" - and forgot twice!! - expected me to stay in the next day as they'd "absolutely, definitely be there." They got quite nasty about it when I refused ...

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RhiWrites · 17/12/2015 13:22

Here is an actual message I received from a freegler. This is a person who didn't show up on the first time arranged and said they'd come a couple of days later. They didn't show up a second time and emailed this.

Sorry for the delayed reply, I had managed to forget about this, and then tried to pop round tonight and just couldn't find your house! I'd printed off a map but couldn't find [your] road anywhere, so spent about 30mins driving round and then had to give up. Managed to take 3hours from leaving work to getting home (usually 1hr!), so i think I won't try again so I'll leave the jars if that's ok - Sorry!

Admittedly they said "sorry" but is it just me who gets a vibe from this that they thought I was hiding my house and that I had wasted their time? I had given them the postcode and everything.

Since I had a lot of interest I went to the next person on the list who came round that afternoon and got the stuff.

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Puzzledandpissedoff · 17/12/2015 13:25

It gives me massive guilt to throw usable stuff in landfill

I wouldn't necessarily worry - I can't speak for other areas, but round here the council tip has contacts with charities, etc, who come to pick up some of the better stuff and refurbish it for sale

I used to wonder why they didn't just use Freecycle themselves, but maybe they think it's easier to have one central point they can source things from?

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BatteryHenPecked · 17/12/2015 13:25

I never use FB or Freecycle any more- so many bad experiences.

Once I gave away a load of gardening stuff on Freecycle.

A guy said he'd come Tuesday at 5pm. He didn't.
He contacted me to say sorry and that he'd come Wednesday at 5pm. He didn't.
I contacted him and told him he was messing me around and if he didn't come Thursday at 5pm I was re-advertising. He said he couldn't do Thursday but his sister lived right near where I work and could collect it from work on Friday at 6pm.
Fine.
I hung around work until 6pm. They both rocked up at 6:15pm to pick it up.
No apology for messing me around or even a thank you.
The next morning this guy emailed me complaining that one of the pots was cracked and I had advertised falsely. He finished off the emailing telling me I was (and I quote) 'hot' and asking me for a drink. Confused

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ShebaShimmyShake · 17/12/2015 13:29

I've never had a bad experience but loads of people in my local Freecycle group have had this problem (and I don't Freecycle often). What's annoying me are all the endless sob stories. I appreciate there are people struggling but if you're kind enough to give something away you're not supposed to be guilted on from all sides about it. It's put me off Freecycling decent stuff.

I also dislike the sense of entitlement coming from a lot of people, expressed in various different ways. The giver has no obligation to pass on anything and you're not paying; nobody is entitled to anything.

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moggle · 17/12/2015 13:30

Battery that is unbelievable!!! Some people

OP YANBU... but i guess if she'd just said "sorry, I forgot, I'm not going to be able to make it to pick it up now before xmas" then you may have said "oh dear, where do you live, maybe we can drop it off if we happen to drive by" then she would've said "I live at Y" and you would've said "Oh no that's much too far we never go that way".
And the end result would've been the same. You stuck with the cushion. So she just cut out the middleman by asking if you could delivery but caused you extra rage which btw is entirely understandable!

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Whoknewitcouldbeso · 17/12/2015 13:30

Pmsl, honestly the stuff I see as 'wanted' on freecycle are so shockingly gobsmacking that I rarely look at the posts anymore. It's just people taking the piss right and left, I don't know where they get their nerve.

Plus on the p

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Littleelffriend · 17/12/2015 13:31

I hate this. I also hate the "is anyone giving away for free a sofa/freezer/washing machine/bed (etc etc) as I've just moved into my first flat with a new baby and don't have anything. Cue responses from the nice people, only for the OP to respond with "oh no, I wanted a blue sofa, not a grey one, I wanted a Bosch freezer, not a Hotpoint". If you're so desperate, are you really in a position to be that picky??

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