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should people who work with kids....

(143 Posts)
Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 22:36:07

Associate with someone who is a suspected paedo? Have NC for this but I am interested in what others think, I am absolutely being genuine.
The person in question works with kids, and has kids. She associates with someone who has been arrested on several occasions and due to lack of solid evidence cases have been dropped eventually. However SS had to be informed and they did their research and deemed the person a risk to kids, and basically said they believed he was very likely a paedophile. The person who works with kids was fully informed of this and warned that her children should not be left alone with her 'friend'. Bearing in mind she only associates with said 'paedophile' to piss off an ex partner and also because I think she believes there will be a hefty payout for her in a will eventually.
If this person was working with your child/children, or was your friend and you were at their house and your child possibly around the risky offender how would react? AIBU to think that she's a fucking disgrace and if people found out they would go bat shit?

purpledasies Mon 07-Dec-15 22:38:50

As long as she keeps her contact with this person and her contact with kids separate I can't see a problem.

If she was introducing the person to the kids she works with or leaving them in his care that would be different.

Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 22:40:23

She has this person in her home, and I know for a fact that a lot of her friends know the person hence must have been around them. And nearly all of them have young kids

winterswan Mon 07-Dec-15 22:41:42

I'm assuming she isn't taking the children she works with to his home, or bringing him into work with her.

Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 22:43:21

No of course not. Whilst I am aware she isn't breaking any laws I personally would be disgusted and annoyed if a friend of mine was associating with someone like this, had them around their own children and certainly if the said person had been around my kids and I didn't know of their record

purpledasies Mon 07-Dec-15 22:45:21

If her friends know the person, then I don't see how her stopping contact with him would help - they'd still know him wouldn't they? Social services or the police could, and maybe should, have a word with these other friends with young children if they don't know the information you're aware of.

winterswan Mon 07-Dec-15 22:45:56

Somis your annoyance that the woman in question is associating with him because she has children or because she works with children?

ilovesooty Mon 07-Dec-15 22:48:03

He hasn't got a record if he's never been convicted.

Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 22:48:29

That's what I mean, the friends and people around her don't know the truth. Shes a compulsive liar and has painted the said paedo and their partner to be a fabulous couple whom everyone respects, it's crazy

MammaTJ Mon 07-Dec-15 22:48:39

Before the Plymouth Nursery case (sorry, can't remember names well) I would have agreed that as long as the friend and the children were kept separate then there should not be a problem, but now I am not so sure.

I would need to know how much influence the person has over her, what the nature of their relationship is before making a judgement.

Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 22:50:07

He hasn't been convicted in court - he has been charged by the police several times and SS deem him a risk. Surely someone who works with children and has their own young kids should NOT have someone who SS (and the police) think is a paedophile around their children? I am aware that she isn't breaking any laws btw

Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 22:52:16

My annoyance is more that she has everyone around her thinking she's Mother Earth - yet she knowingly associates with this person, knowing every detail of their past. I suppose what I am asking is if she was your friend or looking after your kids would you be furious if your kids had been near the person, or doubt her as a professional?

MammaTJ Mon 07-Dec-15 22:53:51

I am pretty sure that this would be flagged up by DBS, should he ever do one, due to the changes made after the guy (again, crap with names) who was a caretaker at a school and killed Holly and Jessica was found to have suspicious behaviour but no convictions in his past.

winterswan Mon 07-Dec-15 22:55:47

But that doesn't seem relevant as she isn't taking the children she works with or looks after to this person. She is presumably supervising him around her own children. Is it what I would do - probably not, but the 'working with kids' is only relevant if she's taking him to work or taking the children she works with to him.

Cutecat78 Mon 07-Dec-15 22:56:31

It wouldn't be flagged up on her DBS though.

He has no need to do one.

Cutecat78 Mon 07-Dec-15 22:57:21

And things you haven't been convicted of are not flagged up on your DBS.

Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 23:00:12

Fair enough about the work thing however if you were her friend and attended social events where this person was present with your children and you didn't know how would you feel?

winterswan Mon 07-Dec-15 23:01:28

But why would they be present with my children - I'm not trying to be obtuse but I don't understand why it would affect me that someone I know associates with someone unsavoury!

Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 23:02:28

Because she has the person at her house, around her kids. Invites them to kids birthday parties, goes on day trips with them which involve other families too

Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 23:03:34

She will be holding a special birthday party soon. The person will more than likely be attending, as will her friends with their kids.

Shenanagins Mon 07-Dec-15 23:06:59

No, I woul be happy at all. I would question why the suspected paedophile was hanging around the person who has access to children. It would also concern me about the judgement of someone who works with children hanging out with a suspected paedophile.

Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 23:12:45

Thank you shenanigans
This is my point exactly, I cannot go into exact detail about why she associates with this person without risking outing myself to anyone on here. The person who informed me of the situation knows everything and is part of the suspected paedophiles extended family. And has been advised off the record by the authorities to keep their kids as far away from the paedo as possible. The reason the paedo is not in jail is the CPS splitting hairs, I think without a doubt a jury would have returned a guilty verdict had it done to trial

Theworldmakesnosense Mon 07-Dec-15 23:13:32

*gone to trial even

cleaty Mon 07-Dec-15 23:14:58

I would question her judgement.

StarOnTheTree Mon 07-Dec-15 23:23:03

I would be absolutely bloody livid.

If that person wants to take risks with her own kids (though I don't agree that she should be allowed to in this case) then so be it. But if I found out that she was one of my friends and my kids had been around that person I would go ballistic. I trust my friends and I trust the DC friend's parents so to find that they'd been putting my kids at risk would mean the end of that friendship. And I'd make sure that everyone knew why.

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