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to think the promise of an eternal erection is not something most men would like? <yes, it's religion but meant to be lighthearted>

(21 Posts)
givepeasachance Mon 07-Dec-15 00:03:03

I read recently that part of the promise to (radicalised) Muslim men when they have blown themselves and any infidels up is that they get many virgins with welcoming vaginas (number disputed) and AN ETERNAL ERECTION.

I'm not sure this is very well thought through.

An eternal erection?

Isn't that uncomfortable?
Isn't the best bit the orgasm?

Doesn't it start to ache after a while?

To quote: "Besides, the penis of the Elected never softens. The erection is eternal"

Sounds exhausting.

EatShitDerek Mon 07-Dec-15 00:09:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ComposHatComesBack Mon 07-Dec-15 00:20:25

they get many virgins

I don't know why you want that, especially when the most prominent publically professed virgin is Ann Widdicombe. Imagine blowing yourself to Kingdom come and your reward is 72 Ann Widdicombes.

ComposHatComesBack Mon 07-Dec-15 00:22:33

AN ETERNAL ERECTION

Well I suppose you'd always have somewhere to hang your coat and piddling over high walls would be a doddle.

CarlaJones Mon 07-Dec-15 00:27:02

What do female suicide bombers get then? Virgin men with welcoming penises?

sugar21 Mon 07-Dec-15 00:31:04

Mr eternal erection goes to eternal tailor's and the assistant says which side do you dress Sir
EE replies straight up the middle mate fgrin

ComposHatComesBack Mon 07-Dec-15 00:35:51

Virgin men with welcoming penises

Cagoule wearing Startrek fans who still live with their mum or Cliff Richard with a permanent chubby on.

Now there's a welcoming prospect. Well worth turning yourself into a semtex and internal organ smoothie for.

houseHuntinginmanchester Mon 07-Dec-15 00:47:18

What a load of crap.
Maybe you should choose better reading material rather than worrying about eternal erections and spreading 'religious knowledge' from the daily mail and co.

givepeasachance Mon 07-Dec-15 00:49:09

I hadn't thought about weeing.

The inconveniences are mounting up.

Seeyounearertime Mon 07-Dec-15 01:03:11

That would make watching Corrie with your parents difficult.
Do they have Corrie in the after life? Something for the 12 Virgins to watch once they've been devirginized I guess?

Cerseirys Mon 07-Dec-15 04:00:38

Weren't ISIS recently targeted by Anonymous? Bet those weren't the 72 virgins they were expecting!

SuperT3d Mon 07-Dec-15 05:24:43

youtu.be/3frpGMmd7u8

Can't beat a bit of Tim Minchin this early in the morning :-)

badfurday Mon 07-Dec-15 05:25:30

Isn't it a bad idea to have an erection for too long? All that blood going to it etc?
And Virgin sex is crap, surely sex with an experienced hottie is a better "prize"?!

Euphemia Mon 07-Dec-15 06:32:46

Maybe it just means that whenever you want an erection, you can have one, for eternity? Like, never any need for Viagra?

VestalVirgin Mon 07-Dec-15 10:50:17

What do female suicide bombers get then? Virgin men with welcoming penises?

You may just have discovered by there are so relatively few female suicide bombers.
I would try and become a martyr just to avoid such a fate.

And Virgin sex is crap, surely sex with an experienced hottie is a better "prize"?!

I am pretty sure they just want to penetrate unwilling women and cause the maximum amount of pain. You know what sort of state they want to establish.

Good reasons to not die a virgin, just in case. The suicide bomber afterlife probably doubles as special hell for virgins.

Weren't ISIS recently targeted by Anonymous? Bet those weren't the 72 virgins they were expecting!

Well, you know what they say about being careful what you wish for. grin

slug Mon 07-Dec-15 11:28:01

An eternal erection would be a bit pointless unless there's a fetish I don't know about involving 72 white grapes

meditrina Mon 07-Dec-15 11:30:26

Weren't ISIS recently targeted by Anonymous? Bet those weren't the 72 virgins they were expecting!

Brilliant! grin

ComposHatComesBack Mon 07-Dec-15 11:34:09

I just got the anonymous joke. It made me snort.

glentherednosedbattleostrich Mon 07-Dec-15 11:52:26

The mental images on this thread are leaving me traumatised and in serious need of therapy!

BartholinsSister Mon 07-Dec-15 12:01:40

Is this from the Quran?

VestalVirgin Mon 07-Dec-15 12:27:05

They are still debating whether the 72 virgins are in the Quran or whether it is actually 72 grapes.

I am pretty sure the eternal erection is not part of the original Quran.

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