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there is a tree in the garden looking at me funny

(61 Posts)
Owllady Fri 04-Dec-15 21:25:31

It has wide eyes and a shocked mouth
I'm not bu

Caprinihahahaha Fri 04-Dec-15 21:26:25

It could be worse. You could be getting evils from your bush


Owllady Fri 04-Dec-15 21:27:35

This Bush is now an out of control tree
Goading me

polentapies Fri 04-Dec-15 21:29:26

Big mushroom tree?

Owllady Fri 04-Dec-15 21:30:18

Are you accusing me of taking drugs? Are you the tree?

PeaceOfWildThings Fri 04-Dec-15 21:31:57

We need a photograph of the tree. Not the bush.

Caprinihahahaha Fri 04-Dec-15 21:32:49

Yes, no bush photos

<shakes head emphatically>

ExitStageLeft Fri 04-Dec-15 21:35:13

There's a tree at the end of my road I like to call Proud Mary. She's always trying to be confrontational with me.

EmpressOfTheVulvaCupcakes Fri 04-Dec-15 21:36:40

Has it twigged you?

Owllady Fri 04-Dec-15 21:40:39

It's a holly tree, honestly it's evil!

sugar21 Fri 04-Dec-15 21:42:33

Sounds like the tree is barking mad
Be careful!

ExitStageLeft Fri 04-Dec-15 21:42:40

Swagger outside and offer it out.

dodobookends Fri 04-Dec-15 21:43:38

Hang some tinsel and baubles on it

EmpressOfTheVulvaCupcakes Fri 04-Dec-15 21:43:50

Maybe it's just trying to branch out.

Caprinihahahaha Fri 04-Dec-15 21:43:52

Massive prick.

Tinklebinkle Fri 04-Dec-15 21:43:59

As an allotment owner, I can absolutely confirm that some trees are fuckers. Especially the fruit ones. Don't get me started on out of control bushes. It's a political issue it really is. YANBU. I feel your pain.

Wagglebees Fri 04-Dec-15 21:44:05

Leaf it alone.

Mmmmcake123 Fri 04-Dec-15 21:45:31

Berry unreasonable and (w)holly inappropriate

FreeWorker1 Fri 04-Dec-15 21:46:50

Is it an Ent? Like in Lord of the Rings?

The Ents are giant shepherds of the forest and resemble the trees they look after. Sadly, they lost their Entwives along time ago. As they get older an Ent becomes more like a tree and settle in one place but they never die.

There is a lot of folklore about anthropomorphic trees.

PotOfYoghurt Fri 04-Dec-15 21:47:47

Is it horny?

PotOfYoghurt Fri 04-Dec-15 21:48:24


Wagglebees Fri 04-Dec-15 21:56:07

Are you in Nania? Is Aslan on the move?

Owllady Fri 04-Dec-15 22:18:05

Please don't tell me I'm in Narnia, I'll be too scared to sleep in the wardrobe

spritefairy Fri 04-Dec-15 22:25:48

Maybe it's looking for ivy? Are you called ivy?

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig Fri 04-Dec-15 22:27:38

You know when you look back out it will somehow seem closer to the house. Like it moved or something.

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