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to feel like shit about this every year birthdays

(13 Posts)
lakia Sat 28-Nov-15 08:23:24

Just need to share and I suspect that I am probably way over reacting but I cant help it.
Every year its the same my two nieces buy my one sister a decent present usually money and a little gift along with it ect and all I ever get is a cheap bunch of flowers from them which I suspect their mom our other sister has gone out and fetched for them. This year she even bought the flowers around to me instead of them coming round and saying happy birthday and I always get disappointed about that sort of thing as well.
Last year I received off my one niece a pack of three chocolate bars and a candle that I recognised as having given to my sister the chirstmas before.
Its not that they don't like me or anything I have laughs with them and we go out on occasional outings my one niece is probably more on a par with my other sister perhaps.
I don't understand what its all about but I get hurt by it all and it is eating away at me I know I am probably been silly what do you think feel free to tell me to get a life.

mumblechum1 Sat 28-Nov-15 08:25:41

My nieces have never bought me anything or sent me a card (one's early 30s one's teens).

I personally only "expect" something from DH, DS and my dad. anything else is a bonus.

BondJayneBond Sat 28-Nov-15 08:26:53

Are they a lot closer to your other sister?

TendonQueen Sat 28-Nov-15 08:28:44

How old are they?

I like birthdays and receiving presents, so I'm not one of the people who just dismisses that for adults, but you probably do need not to let it bother you. What do you get for them on their birthdays? Is there a backstory between you and your sisters about who's the favourite?

lakia Sat 28-Nov-15 08:28:49

I understand your point mumble we happen to be a family and always does birthdays etc which is why it really hurts me. I f we a family that was apart a lot I could cope with this.

Junosmum Sat 28-Nov-15 08:30:02

I don't buy my aunt's gifts, never had, it's just not something we do.they bought me gifts though until I was 18.

lakia Sat 28-Nov-15 08:30:21

Well perhaps more on a par but not necessarily closer they see me more than my other sister as I live closer and I am around their moms more often.

lakia Sat 28-Nov-15 08:31:55

I usually give them money in a card. They always make a point of pointing out what they want as well to me also

lakia Sat 28-Nov-15 08:32:35

nieces are 31 and 29

TendonQueen Sat 28-Nov-15 08:41:32

I've stopped buying for cousins of that age. Mind you, most of them now have their own kids so I'm buying for the kids instead. But I wouldn't continue to give money or birthday gifts to relatives in their late twenties onwards. Maybe suggest you all agree to stop getting anything for one another? I think pointing out what they want is them being a bit OTT. They're not teenagers anymore.

KeepOnMoving1 Sat 28-Nov-15 08:44:01

Are they closer to your sister? I like one of my mums brothers more than the others and go a little extra out of my way for them and their kids.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks Sat 28-Nov-15 08:45:27

Tbh at that age I'd start buying them a bunch of flowers each for their birthdays.

pictish Sat 28-Nov-15 09:01:27

Buy them a bunch of flowers on their birthdays and stop worrying about it.

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