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To still be angry and upset by rude git on a tram?

(12 Posts)
PenguinToes Sun 22-Nov-15 10:50:16

On Friday I had to go to Manchester, haven't been there for ages and the tram system has changed since I was last there.

I was heading back to Piccadilly but got on the wrong tram which didn't go that way, upon asking someone (another passenger) they explained no, need to change at x. When asking this a man wearing a suit (I only add this to make a point it just wasn't a pissed up person or similar) a few seats down muttered (loudly enough - I and person helping me heard it) "Of course it doesn't you stupid bitch"

I didn't say anything just gave him a "look" which he returned in a sneering way. Women who had helped me in a friendly way also looked shocked.

Normally let rude bastards wash over me but I don't know, this comment was said with venom - I mean who gives a shit if someone else has fucked up on public transport?

To top it off I told my boyfriend about this and rather than agreeing with me, bloke was just a knob, how rude etc said I should have confronted him and told him to fuck off etc etc. Okay I'm not really confrontational person but what is to be gained by getting into a shouting match with someone?

Anyway I'm still angry about this. AIBU?

goodnightdarthvader1 Sun 22-Nov-15 11:02:07

Of course you're not BU. And your boyfriend needs to learn about street harassment and how women live in fear of answering back in case the situation escalates, because NO ONE will help.

Madlizzy Sun 22-Nov-15 11:06:45

He's a dick, don't give him another thought. You got on the wrong tram and it got sorted, he has to live with being a dick forever. Oh, and tell your dh that it's wiser not to argue on Manchester trams, I use them most days.

Paintedhandprints Sun 22-Nov-15 11:25:54

Are you sure he wasn't just talking to someone on one of them handshake Bluetooth thingies? I like to assume rude/socially inept people have had some sort of brain injury at some point and can't help it. Stops me getting the rage at them. grin

SummerNights1986 Sun 22-Nov-15 11:34:07

tell your dh that it's wiser not to argue on Manchester trams, I use them most days

That sounds kind of threatening...


GlitteryRollers Sun 22-Nov-15 11:37:39

I'd have told him to "fuck off" personally. I will answer back men who think its acceptable to abuse women in the street, because quite frankly things will never change unless we do.

pictish Sun 22-Nov-15 11:38:10

Ywnbu to be rattled by it...he was outlandishly rude to you. Yabu to be still bothered by it. He's either mad or was having the day from Hell...both of which are nothing to do with you.
Forget it and him. x

twinjocks Sun 22-Nov-15 11:56:47

Glad you gave him a "look", but with regard to letting it rattle you, as PPs have said, forget it and him, the tosser! He's got to live with his horrible self.

I've got to hijack with a little Manchester public transport story that happened to my friend, though. She was in Huddersfield last week for a funeral with her sister - they flew in to Manchester from Dublin in the morning and got a train to Huddersfield. But in the evening, the trains back weren't running properly, they were told to get on the only train leaving, and were asking a fellow passenger how to get to the airport from their new arrival point. After some discussion, she said "actually, just get off the train with me, I live not too far from the airport, my car is at the station, and I'll drive you there". So she did. What a nice lady to counteract the OP's nasty man.

Madlizzy Sun 22-Nov-15 12:02:57

Summer, it depends on my mood wink

WorraLiberty Sun 22-Nov-15 12:07:50

Oh thank goodness he was wearing a suit! grin

I take it you've never been on the London underground on a Friday night, if you think pissed people don't wear suits?

Ignore him OP, he sounds like an arse.

You were quite right not to lower yourself by getting into a swearing match with him.

PenguinToes Sun 22-Nov-15 15:40:11

Ha, I know that suit wearing is no guarantee of politeness - just mentioned it highlight it wasn't some younger lads pissing about. The bloke, business man type in 40s didn't look mad or drunk but who knows.

But, yes I'm sure I will get over and I didn't want more stress of a shouting match on a tram. I more pissed off that boyfriend offered no sympathy and moaned at me for not confronting, I'm sure if I had he would have moaned about why I am confronting, let it go etc.

Anyway time for cake

Shirkingfromhome Sun 22-Nov-15 15:48:22

I live in Manchester and got totally confused by the trams this weekend so you're not the only one.

Probably not going to make you feel better but just because someone has a suit on it doesn't make them any sort of authority. I bet if he had a shell suit you'd have told him to do one without hesitation.

Shrug it off Penguin don't let these intrusive thoughts take up any more of your time.

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