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or is my friend re baby name 'copying'

(51 Posts)
lifeinslowmotion Sat 21-Nov-15 22:56:06

My friend has a daughter who is five and I have just had a baby girl a week ago. We have chosen a name which is a shortened version of her daughter's, along the lines of Penelope and Penny. I had always planned to use this name if I had a little girl as it is after my late grandmother.

However my friend has a massive issue with the names being so similar and asked why I can't pick something different or use it as a middle name. She has also taken offence that I have chosen the name and not spoken to her about it beforehand.

So AIBU or is she?

ThenLaterWhenItGotDark Sat 21-Nov-15 22:57:13

She is.

KeepOnMoving1 Sat 21-Nov-15 22:58:09

Your friend is being unreasonable. Why would you run that past her in any case. She's being daft. Those names are not the same at all.

Hatethis22 Sat 21-Nov-15 22:58:50

Really she should have asked you first as your grandmother had dibs on it wink

DramaAlpaca Sat 21-Nov-15 22:58:52

She is.

specialsubject Sat 21-Nov-15 22:58:35

she is.

'waaah! You're copying me!' Playground talk. And since when did she get involved in what you call your baby?

file under 'silly cow' and jettison.

TheCarpenter Sat 21-Nov-15 22:58:55

Congratulations on your daughter. Do not spend this wonderful time worrying about your daft fried.

Your friend needs to get to fuck.

Get a dog and name it after her husband.

LemonBreeland Sat 21-Nov-15 22:59:06

She is being ridiculous. It's not even exactly the same name. And if you had spoken to her about it beforehand she would have told you not to use it, so that is just stupid.

Does she know it is after your Grandmother?

ThenLaterWhenItGotDark Sat 21-Nov-15 22:59:39

grin at getting a dog

DixieNormas Sat 21-Nov-15 23:00:55

Just ignore her, it's not even the same name

lifeinslowmotion Sat 21-Nov-15 23:01:26

Yes she knows it's after my grandmother and her daughter's name is never shortened so in my mind they are two different names.

Wishful80smontage Sat 21-Nov-15 23:05:13

I can't even believe she's got the barefaced cheek to raise it as an issue/ ignore OP she is being ridiculous.

Cookingongas Sat 21-Nov-15 23:05:10

Even if they were exactly the same name ywnbu. Your baby, you name her. End of

Ps congratulations

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeG0es Sat 21-Nov-15 23:06:53

She is. 100%.

HesterShaw Sat 21-Nov-15 23:07:29

Congratulations on your new daughter.

Your friend is being a nob.

cece Sat 21-Nov-15 23:10:19

I used almost the same name as my friend had used for my DC3.

My friend's reaction?

How lovely. I'm really please they will have almost the same name...

Fatmomma99 Sat 21-Nov-15 23:13:51


And no, a NU from me. But I am a little invested.....

That's because my maternal grandmother was called (let's say) Louise. Irrelevant to this, but big in my head, the most beautiful, popular, sought-after girl I went to school with, was also called Louise. When I discussed potentially having children with the boy I lost my virginity to, we agreed a girl would be called Louise. i was 17 at that time.

Turned out all took a bit longer than I anticipated.

Finally gave birth at the ripe old age of 31. To a girl. We (different man, similar conversation) called her Louise.

Unfortunately in the interim, cousin on PATERNAL side had had a daughter and named her Louisa.

Paternal grandmother gave me SUCH a hard time (cousin didn't care, and did understand why). Even though paternal grandmother and (by now long-dead) maternal grandmother had known each other well.

You name your baby as you name your baby, for the reasons you choose. The rest of the world can fuck off!!!!

carabos Sat 21-Nov-15 23:14:02

She's being ridiculous. Millions of people have the same / similar names. Some names cross cultures and language - there's a version of John in pretty much all European languages.

I really don't get people being precious about names. DS2's middle name is DH's late father's name. XH's mother went ballistic by all accounts when she heard the name on the grapevine (not that it's any of her business) as she reckoned I had pinched XFiL's father's name to be annoying hmm. The name is David confused.

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes Sat 21-Nov-15 23:14:34

Ditch the friend then it's no longer a problem.

SpanglesGalloway Sat 21-Nov-15 23:14:38

No one owns a name!!! She needs to get over it!!! My parents close friends called their daughter the same name as my sis. So what. They were flattered! Your friend needs to grow up congratulations on your baby girl

talkinnpeace Sat 21-Nov-15 23:15:57

Wow, just imagine if her child was called Sarah or Mary or John or Peter
she'd be angry with everybody grin

CandlesBurning Sat 21-Nov-15 23:17:07

Does she really expect you to rename a week old baby? Tell her if she's got a top 10 name her daughter will have a friend in class with that name

Bunbaker Sat 21-Nov-15 23:17:10

Names aren't owned by people. What you decide to call your daughter is no-one else's business but your own.

If anyone wanted to call their daughter the same name that DD has I would be flattered not offended. I just don't get it.

And congratulations on the birth of your little girl flowers

MissMoo22 Sat 21-Nov-15 23:17:12

Just had this conversation with my sister who is worried the name she likes for her DD (not born yet) is too similar to a relatives DD's name. I told her there are no fucking dibs on baby names and she should choose a name she loves and never mind what anyone else thinks/says.

talkinnpeace Sat 21-Nov-15 23:20:00

All of my grandfathers great grandsons have his name in their names
my cousins and I are not copying each other
we are honouring a man we all respected greatly

only somebody stupid would think otherwise

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