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To think new-ish boyfriend acted in a vile fashion when in bed?

(152 Posts)
BrokenPots Fri 20-Nov-15 19:38:24

So I have been seeing someone for the past few months. It has been going pretty well, have taken things slowly (ish). We don't live together and both have our own places. I was staying at his house for a few days recently as we both had time off work and an "incident" when were in bed has really pissed me off so in the middle of sex he basically lets rip with a massive stinking fart and proceeds to laugh about it, not in an embarrassed "oh shit, I'm sorry" laugh but genuinely thinking it's funny and making stupid comments, it was so bad I basically had to open window and then take myself to the bathroom, needless to say the mood was over for me. Then he starts acting stupid "why are you upset, couldn't help it, dodgy food" and that I am being "up-tight". FFS we are mid 30s and he was giggling like a teenage boy would when in a group of mates.

So AIBU to think this was totally unacceptable? TBH I think it showed a lack of respect and hardly conducive to me wanting to shag him any time soon.

SummerNights1986 Fri 20-Nov-15 19:40:41

I think it showed a lack of respect
Did he do it on purpose?

If not and it was an accident, what else is there to do but laugh?

You do sound a bit uptight, sorry.

DrGoogleWillSeeYouNow Fri 20-Nov-15 19:41:22

I would have ended the relationship there and then.

Enjolrass Fri 20-Nov-15 19:42:05

Well Yanbu that it you were no longer in the mood of it was that bad.

But I think you seem overly upset that he didn't deal with it how you wanted him too.

He has no control over the smell. Did he force out a fart on purpose?

I do think overall Yabu

FlameProofBoots Fri 20-Nov-15 19:42:15

I've been married for five years and dh has never farted in front of me. I'd be seriously reconsidering my options if he did it mid shag.

OpenDoorAsshole Fri 20-Nov-15 19:43:30

Unless he followed through an shit on you, YABU.

Farts happen, get over it.

Justmuddlingalong Fri 20-Nov-15 19:43:58

How do you think he should have acted/reacted?

Bunbaker Fri 20-Nov-15 19:45:34

Some of you are so uptight. I'm sure he didn't do it on purpose.

DontBuyANewMumCashmere Fri 20-Nov-15 19:46:04

Mid shag is rank! Coming from someone very immature who farts in front of DH and we quite happily laugh about them.
Mid shag? Not on! envy (boak not envy...)

SummerNights1986 Fri 20-Nov-15 19:46:16

I would have ended the relationship there and then

Even if it was an accident?

Dh farted mid thrust, the second time we ever had sex. I had to leave the room because I thought I was going to throw up I was laughing so much. It was me laughing that ruined the mood more than the fart! Poor bugger was mortified though lol.

But 11 years later i'm glad that I didn't dump him over such a stupid one off non-issue.

maxxytoe Fri 20-Nov-15 19:46:45

He needs to calm down .
30 odd year old men should not be getting hysterical over a pup

Iggi999 Fri 20-Nov-15 19:47:07

I am petrified about doing that during sex, don't know why. Being with someone who laughed it off would be a great release!
But if it's a deal breaker for you, move on. Or talk to him.

Ikeameatballs Fri 20-Nov-15 19:47:39

Goodness, I thought you were going to describe him doing something abusive.

He didn't behave how you wanted him to, not sure he actually did anything wrong.

Enjolrass Fri 20-Nov-15 19:49:12

I find it funny that people would end a relationship because of a fart.

Everyone does it. Some are more discreet, but everyone does

CainInThePunting Fri 20-Nov-15 19:50:31

He sounds like an immature prat to me.

11 year olds find farts hysterical, grown men accept they happen unexpectedly at times, apologise and try not to dwell.

I would be dumping him.

BrokenPots Fri 20-Nov-15 19:50:59

Okay, yes I understand that farting is normal, but come on, unless you are seriously ill you can control the release to a degree!

Yes, I almost think he forced it out as hard as can be, maybe he had some warped idea that is would be a laugh and amusing for me like it would be in a rugby changing room or similar.

As I say, after it he made stupid comments and laughed like it really funny. If he had just said "oh shit, I'm sorry, so embarrassing" then would have been better.

SummerNights1986 Fri 20-Nov-15 19:51:22

I thought you were going to describe him doing something abusive

Me too.

If he held you down and farted in your face repeatedly then i'd say the op had a point in describing his behaviour as 'vile'. This, not so much.

SummerNights1986 Fri 20-Nov-15 19:53:03

unless you are seriously ill you can control the release to a degree!

Not really, not 100% of the time. Have you never experienced a fart slipping out by accident at an inappropriate time?

Enjolrass Fri 20-Nov-15 19:53:06

unless you are seriously ill you can control the release to a degree!

Not for everyone. I have a sensitive stomach. Sometimes they just come out. Holding it in gives me awful stomach cramp. That's if I can.

I do t have to be seriously ill.

Honestly some nights I am so bad dh has to crack a window...good job he loves me smile

TimeToMuskUp Fri 20-Nov-15 19:54:13

I'm a 34 year old female and would laugh like a drain if DH farted mid-sex.

It is vile, yes. But everyone trumps from time to time, even the Queen. I don't think you can use it as a genuine deal breaker. Unless he followed through, in which case, delete and block him. And burn the bedsheets.

GissASquizz Fri 20-Nov-15 19:55:34

Lord. I'm glad dh can laugh when my fanjo goes off like a trombone.

monkeysox Fri 20-Nov-15 19:55:58

Ffs it's just a fart. Everyone does them. Have a biscuit

JesusInTheCabbageVan Fri 20-Nov-15 19:58:02

Time NOW I'm picturing the Queen farting mid-thrust. There's a thought confused

MistressMerryWeather Fri 20-Nov-15 19:59:02




VoyageOfDad Fri 20-Nov-15 19:59:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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