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To be more angry than upset now?

(4 Posts)
Esmeismyhero Mon 16-Nov-15 19:30:41

And also wished I'd had the courage to say something.

A few years ago I had a miscarriage, it was one of many and I was devastated, still am.

I went on the have dd and dh has had a vasectomy so we don't go through the heartbreak of rm again.

Anyway today I was in a large pharmacy chain and I saw someone who I hadn't seen since I'd learnt of our loss.

Due to medical conditions I take clexane whilst pregnant. My dr prescribed one months worth of 60mg dose clexane per month for the duration and after pregnancy. Pretty standard. 2 X doses per day for a month so a lot of meds.

After my miscarriage, midwife obviously knew so I was taken off the books per say, I had just put in a prescription for clexane (which is very expensive).

I was in the pharmacy with my dm putting painkiller prescription in and advised the lady behind the counter that I would need to cancel the clexane prescription.

She got really agitated and told me in a loud voice that they had already ordered in the prescription and they would need a reason for the cancellation.

I was so mortified and still in shock from everything, it was like she was telling of a child.

I just about managed to say my baby had died so I didn't need it anymore before she just huffed and went into the back. There were loads of customers and they had heard everything.

I cried a lot when we got home and It was brought to the forefront of my mind when I saw her by chance today in the pharmacy today.

I was angry and I actually want to make a complaint, have I left it too long?

I was really vulnerable, grieving, head all over the place. Dd was conceived a month later so I out it all to the back of my mind but by god I was riled when I saw her today.

JesusInTheCabbageVan Mon 16-Nov-15 20:19:13

flowers Esme I'm so sorry.

While it is a long delay, I don't see how they can possibly say you're too late to make a complaint. There's a very clear reason why you're only considering it now, and I think many people in your position would do the same. I hope you will complain - she sounds utterly useless and horribly insensitive.

hesterton Mon 16-Nov-15 20:22:04

Even if you don't want to raise a formal complaint, it may help you to speak to the manager about what happened and how it still makes you feel now. But don't expect her to be sorry - she had the chance to apologise then and didn't, so it's unlikely she will now.

Hygge Mon 16-Nov-15 20:27:59

I'm sorry Esme flowers

I would complain, even if nothing happens, you've put your feelings on record and that may help you.

There are a couple of people I wish I'd complained about when we had our losses.

The woman doing the scan, which I believe showed something was very wrong in my pregnancy, who dismissed my concerns and shouted at me because her machinery was more accurate than my dates on a calendar. I don't think she could have prevented our loss, but we might have been able to prepare for it.

A receptionist at the GP surgery, who told me off for missing a midwife's appointment, which the midwife should have cancelled as she was aware our baby had died. I had to explain in front of a crowded waiting room as well.

And the midwife who repeatedly insisted on called my daughter "your miscarriage" even though she was actually a premature baby who lived for two hours.

I wish I had been able to complain at the time, but sometimes you are dealing with so much you just can't take on something else.

I'm so sorry for your loss. If you think it would help you to make your feelings known I would contact them and tell them.

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