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Am I over thinking this?

(15 Posts)
3rdrockfromthesun Sun 15-Nov-15 20:58:59

Background: last year I was not working and we did not have a lot of money but I was celebrating Christmas with my family and extended family. I brought a Christmas present for my cousin's step children but the youngest pulled a face at what I got her. I know it is stupid but it upset me as I did not have a lot of money and went to great lengths to ensure that I got her and her brother something so they did not feel excluded. My

This year I have brought both a box of chocolate (which cost a pound each). My two cousins have two children each and I have spent £5 or less on their presents (they are 4 and under). Last year I gave joint Christmas presents to the babies. I am slightly worried that the step cousins will see what I have got the children and feel like they have missed out.

WIBU to slip a £5 into the presents with the chocolate or am I over thinking this?

BTW they are both at secondary school but can not remember their ages

Oldraver Sun 15-Nov-15 21:02:46

Overthinking. Any ungratefullness would be met with no more presents

ImperialBlether Sun 15-Nov-15 21:02:47

If someone pulled their face at a present I'd bought them, it would be the last gift they had off me.

TheoriginalLEM Sun 15-Nov-15 21:07:26

cousin's children? waaaaay too much of a distant relative to buy for. I buy for my DD's, parents and ILs and no more. Don't buy for neices and nephews, there are too many of them and quite frankly, they don't need any shite that i could afford to buy anyway. By the same virtue i don't expect presents for my DDs.

SnozBuriedUnderThePatio Sun 15-Nov-15 21:08:54

A secondary school age kid should know better than to pull a face at a present, so they are lucky to get another one this year. Chocolate is a perfectly good present.

Summerwood1 Sun 15-Nov-15 21:28:35

I don't think that I'd get them anything to be honest.

SuperFlyHigh Sun 15-Nov-15 21:30:09

Ungenerous brats! That'd be the last present they got off me!

SuperFlyHigh Sun 15-Nov-15 21:30:40

Ungrateful not ungenerous bah!

Whatabout Sun 15-Nov-15 21:33:32

They maybe like me and totally unable to stop every emotion being visible on their face, they are kids after all and fallible. I'd slip in a fiver to be perfectly honest. If you can afford it of course, if you are considering the cost then maybe not. I think it's easy to be offended when no offence at all is meant, we can't like everything we are given but that doesn't mean they weren't on some level grateful. Kids can find these nuances hard. Maybe I'm too nice, I'm sure I've sucked at accepting presents as a teen and not showed my gratitude even if I've felt it, I'm sorry for that.

Floggingmolly Sun 15-Nov-15 21:34:43

I'd be perfectly happy for them to feel they'd missed out, personally, and I'd be telling them why.

Blondie1984 Sun 15-Nov-15 21:35:29

I wouldn't - if they are rude enough to do that then they may also sniff at it being £5 and not more.....

MascaraAndConverse89 Sun 15-Nov-15 21:37:32

I wouldn't get them anything.
But if you still want to, I'd just leave it at the chocolates and nothing more.

Topseyt Sun 15-Nov-15 21:43:16

Don't bother buying them anything at all. They clearly didn't appreciate the gesture last time and were rude enough to show it.

We don't buy for the wider family and by mutual agreement they don't buy for us or our DDs either. It just gets ridiculous otherwise.

Don't give a fiver to spoilt brats. They will almost certainly judge you because it wasn't enough.

YakTriangle Sun 15-Nov-15 22:15:43

Stick with the sweets. If they turn up their noses to other gifts, they shouldn't expect to get any more than that. And everyone likes sweets anyway.

3rdrockfromthesun Mon 16-Nov-15 07:21:50

Thanks for the responses. I did think I was over thinking it. I think next year I am just going to get a family present - I.e. A box of chocolate/biscuits per family. There are too many people to. Up for!

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