To think this colleague is just plain rude?

[ScribblerOnTheRoof]

There is a guy working in my office, he started about 6 months ago and has always said he thinks the job is shit. I have been here for 3 years and made some excellent friends here.

We were talking about our upcoming Christmas party, the boss pays for us to have a 3 course meal and unlimited drinks. It is on a Saturday afternoon and goes into the evening.

As we were discussing it, the new guy chipped in and said "Can we not have the party on a Friday instead? Or a Thursday? I spend all wekk with you people and don't wanna use my weekend time with you too" I kind of half laughed, thinking he must be joking. Turns out he wasn't and before the conversation even ended he was calling the lady downstairs to tell her he would not be coming.

Ok. Fair enough, a lot of people think that way and I guess he is simply speaking his mind.

Over the last 2 weeks he has not spoken to anyone. Tells us we are annoying, to stop humming along to a tune etc.

He doesn't say goodbye or good morning, just sits there in a mood which seems to be causing animosity.

The Manager has asked him if everything is ok and he says yes.

If anyone else comes into the office he will speak to them but seems to absolutely hate us!

[SeparatedByMotorways]

Ahh, he sounds rude AF but hopefully will decide that he dislikes it so much that he won't stick around too long.

[GenerationX2]

yes he is rude ignore him and don't let him bother you

[laffymeal]

Sounds like an immature arsehole, best revenge is living well, big up what a merry band you are, that'll really get on his nipple end.

[molyholy]

He does sound rude, although I totally understand him refusing to go to a works do on a Saturday night. I wouldn't, and I like the people I work with.

[ScribblerOnTheRoof]

Never known a grown man to sulk to this level and for what seems - no apparant reason

[Weathergames]

We had a lady like this at work who announced "why would I want to be friends with colleagues - I have enough friends already and I spend all day with you why would I socialise with you?!"

She also had a client cry in front of her (think social work) and didn't know what to do so also started crying.

Just let it wash over you - after all it's only work

[AbbeyBartlet]

Tbf people humming or singing is very irritating - one of my colleagues does it so I understand. And having the Christmas party on a Saturday sounds grim. However he might not be 'sulking' so much as just want to keep himself to himself. I share an office with several people , two of whom as bloody annoying, so I tend to keep myself to myself so that I don't end up getting into arguments.

[Orangeanddemons]

I would never go to a works party on a Saturday afternoon or evening. I bloody love my colleagues, they're ace, but none of them would go on a Saturday either. Saturdays are for family time, not socialising with work colleagues. I would happily go on an evening or even a Friday night,but not Saturday.

[MizK]

Whatever he thinks of going to a work do on a Saturday, he sounds unbelievably unpleasant to be around.

I hope nobody accepts him telling them what to do or that they are annoying- he doesn't have the right to dictate the tone of your entire office.

I hope for your sake he leaves soon!

[2ndSopranosRule]

He definitely sounds a bit rude, but I agree with the sentiment of not wanting to spend time with colleagues on weekend. It's a sentiment I share although I never usually articulate it.

[GruntledOne]

Is he actually doing his work whilst he is busy sulking and whinging about how he hates it? If not he'll presumably be out soon anyway.

[Scremersford]

You know that question you usually get asked in interviews, along the lines of "Would you say you are good at team working?" or maybe even "How do you see yourself fitting into an established team?". Maybe he didn't get asked it! Maybe he is really good at his job, and it makes up for his inability to get on with people? I agree, unnecessarily rude, he could have just said he already had plans that day, it makes him sound as if he despises you.

[catfordbetty]

Some people don't seem to understand that you don't have to say everything you think.

[lorelei9]

OP, I'm curious if your office is a Monday-Friday one? In which case, Saturday does seem bizarre and I wouldn't judge him for commenting on it.

[Potatoface2]

if from the beginning he has said the job is shit then he sounds like an idiot....is he trying to get the sack.....then to create a scene about a works christmas do is just ridiculous.....if saturdays have worked for the company for years then its up to you....hes not being forced to go, and the way he went about it is rude....he could have put it a bit more diplomatically....ounds to me like he really doesnt want to work!

[Preciousxbane]

He shouldn't be so mardy and sounds like a pain but some offices can be hard for people to fit in to if they are very different to the people in the office. I worked in an office where all the women were obsessed with handbags, shoes and clothes and nothing else. There were also many dating dramas to contend with, it was exhausting.

[reni2]

He sounds a bit rude. He also is right about the Saturday Christmas do, I would never go to that, weekends are for family and friends. I find humming annoying too, but I'd never tell you that in RL if you were a hummer. It might not be a sulk, he might just keep himself to himself.

[FoxesSitOnBoxes]

He sounds really rude. Maybe he'll leave soon, if he hates it so much (but someone humming along to a song while I was trying to work would drive me up the wall )

[Booyaka]

I wouldn't go on a Saturday. That would feel like work encroaching on my personal time. Humming is annoying.

Not saying good morning or good night is very rude, and saying to you that the job is shit.

But I do think people shouldn't expect colleagues to be friends with them. I don't like to do it, from personal experience I know that it often ends badly with friendships being dragged into office politics and cliques forming.

Having said I do think everybody is entitled to basic respect at work and to be treated politely by their colleagues. I would challenge him on it tbh.

[Cheby]

He does sound rude, but your office doesn't sound like my cup of tea either really. Saturday work Xmas party? Unless it's a paid for black tie do with plus ones invited then there is no way I'd be up for that. And humming/random noises in the office is annoying.

But I would probably just seethe quietly and politely decline the party invite. Not be horrid about it.

[Donge13]

He is rude, but I would not go on a Saturday. A Friday straight from work yes but into my actual personal time no

[CakeMountain]

If he's only been there six months he is still in his probation period and he could be fired quite easily. Ignore, we will probably leave soon anyway/

[AyeAmarok]

Agree with him on the Saturday thing. Dragging employees out on a Saturday isn't much of a reward.

He probably could have put it a bit more diplomatically though.

YABU to hum in an office.

[TelephoneIgnoringMachine]

He's perfectly entitled not to want to go on a work night, any night of the week. He also sounds rude and immature. Best thing all round that he doesn't go, really. He doesn't sound like he brightens anyone's day!