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To think my boss is a narcisstic witch?

(8 Posts)
itsthecircleoflife Thu 05-Nov-15 22:37:56

The thing is- a month or so ago, I would of said the complete opposite.

We have worked together for a while now, and I thought we got on well. But a few things have come to my attention lately and its leaving a sour taste in my mouth.

She will never, ever let someone else take credit for their work when her own boss is involved. Will she praise others for a good job when its just us lackies about? Sure she will. But if her boss is about- the work is all hers.

She has decided to share personal details of my life with other co workers. Things that shouldnt be shared, and that anyone with half a fucking brain cell would know not to share.

She is nice as pie to people to their faces, but as soon as their backs are turned she has opinon about everyone. And everything.

She is very manipulative and knows how to manipulate people to do what she wants. She identifies peoples weaknesses and uses them to her advantage, trying to make it look like she is "helping"- and it comes across that way, but its obvious that isnt what she is doing.

I just dont know how to deal with her. I cant avoid her, i work with her on a daily basis in a very small work environment. I try to avoid her and she is just nasty.

holeinmyheart Thu 05-Nov-15 23:03:54

Unfortunately whatever you think of this boss, THEY are the boss. You can either suck it up or move.
There are just some mad people about, who whatever you do, will always be difficult to work for and eventually will make you ill.
I know it is not easy in the present climate to move, but there is very little you can do about a bad boss.
Even if you keep detailed records( which I would recommend) who can you take it to?
I have worked in a Job made miserable by bullying Managers and the only option is to leave. Sorry, as it not fair.

Booyaka Thu 05-Nov-15 23:09:15

God. She sounds like my ex boss. I left. When you say a small work environment, is it a small company? It's very, very hard to deal with people like that when they're well in with the only management the company has.

MartinRohdesBellybuttonFluff Thu 05-Nov-15 23:13:08

She is a covert bully by the sounds of things. I worked for someone similar before OP, you have my sympathy.

www.in-equilibrium.co.uk/covert-v-overt-bullying-examples/

howtorebuild Thu 05-Nov-15 23:15:04

I would leave.

Thattimeofyearagain Thu 05-Nov-15 23:16:15

I've got one of those
After years of angst and frustration my wise dm pointed out that the one thing she can't control I'd my reaction to her crazy shit behaviour.
So I love- bombed her.grin.

itsthecircleoflife Thu 05-Nov-15 23:17:31

The thing is, my job is quite specialist. There is very little chance of me finding a job with similar responsibility and pay in my area, and there isnt a chance I want to move to say London where I have more of a chance of finding the job im doing.

Could I not just bury her under my granny flat? wink better give the platts a call

holeinmyheart Fri 06-Nov-15 00:19:07

Well if you can't move and you can't change her then, that only leaves you.
So I recommend a Mindful course and Counselling for you. The cheapest way to get counselling is to go on a counselling course run by a local college.
This will give you the weapons to deal with your boss.
Just make sure that you do your job as best you can ( keep notes) and then go home. Don't over engage with your boss and don't socialise with her either. Be polite and distant, as it makes you ill being nice to someone you secretly despise.

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