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To not be grateful when DH buys me clothes I don't want and don't like

(184 Posts)
Memyselfandthatotherperson Wed 04-Nov-15 22:18:14

It happened again today. DH went to the shops (supermarket - so not talking pricey) and asked if I wanted a dress. He sent me a photo. I said no thanks - it was shapeless and ugly. He bought it anyway and got me to try it on ... And it's still shapeless and ugly. I've told him to take it back and now he's got the hump. Silent treatment and everything.
I think in his head he was doing something nice for me ... So AIBU to not take the dress, smile and say thank you?

wizzywig Wed 04-Nov-15 22:19:37

Why is he in a strop? You said you didnt like it. Was he spoiling for a fight and thats why he ignored what you said?

MotherOfFlagons Wed 04-Nov-15 22:21:10

No, not at all. You told him not to buy it, but he did. Refund all the way and fuck his strop.

I would hate someone else choosing and buying clothes for me.

Only1scoop Wed 04-Nov-15 22:23:23


As long as you stated you didn't want him to buy it.

Why would he do that.

AnyFucker Wed 04-Nov-15 22:25:46

is he on glue ?

Only1scoop Wed 04-Nov-15 22:27:14


Had he done a trolley dash down the solvents aisle?

janethegirl2 Wed 04-Nov-15 22:28:40

My Dh loves buying me shite clothes from eBay etc, they are mainly unwearable. I just thank him and take them to a charity shop several weeks later.
I am fortunate he tends to forget what he's bought me. So there's no arguments.

annandale Wed 04-Nov-15 22:29:42

I'd be really touched he thought of me, try it on, say I like it, wear it maybe once to please him.

It's a dress. What does it matter? It's nice to be nice.

AnchorDownDeepBreath Wed 04-Nov-15 22:30:07

Did he buy it before he saw your response?

If not, make him wear it. Or buy him something hideous too. Dick.

TPel Wed 04-Nov-15 22:31:28

Does he want you to look shapeless because of his issues?

TheHouseOnTheLane Wed 04-Nov-15 22:32:02

annadale why should she pretend to like it and WEAR it when she thinks it's ugly?


SantasLittleMonkeyButler Wed 04-Nov-15 22:32:23

I'd be grateful for the gift.

Maybe that's because I never receive any.

bearleftmonkeyright Wed 04-Nov-15 22:32:56

I think it's weird. And he has done it before? Yanbu, why would you wear something you told him you don't like.

AnyFucker Wed 04-Nov-15 22:33:59

is he a Feeder too ?

bloodyteenagers Wed 04-Nov-15 22:34:20

He asked. You said no. Totally ignored you, said duck it and bought it anyway. Now he's sulking cos you still don't like the thing.. Tell him to grow up and stop being such a ridiculous arse.

annandale Wed 04-Nov-15 22:35:03

Um because it's a present from her lover. Really, you have never used or worn any present given to you that wasn't your style?

NorksAreMessy Wed 04-Nov-15 22:35:26

Does he choose your shampoo?

Mmmmcake123 Wed 04-Nov-15 22:36:02

My dh bought me the odd clothing gift at Xmas when we were younger. I don't think I was being insensitive, but I just explained you can't buy women's clothing as a gift. It's not like men's, i.e. s, m, l. I pointed out diff shaped women and by the end had prob bored him to tears so much he stopped.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Wed 04-Nov-15 22:37:23

YNBU. He asked if you wanted it. You said no, and he bought it anyway. I know you can get a refund by shy did he waste his money.
I can relate too. I used to be offerended when people would buy my dd clothes when she was little as I used to like dressing her in the way II used to dress her in smock frilly dresses. I'd do the unusual "ahhh thanks very much its lovely, as you can't exactly tell people you don't like a gift can you. To me buying clothes for my child was dictating to me how I should dress her.
I remember my friend bought her this ghastly dress for Christmas. I only put it on her one time when I knew dd was going to be seeing df.
After that day. The washing machine monster unfortunately ate it.grin

Memyselfandthatotherperson Wed 04-Nov-15 22:38:36

He has done it quite a few times before. I think he does think they're nice but really doesn't accept when I say no, thank you, don't buy it. It does feel like he wants the fight, but I doubt he sees it that way.
I want clothes that make me feel good when I wear them. Humph.

Mmmmcake123 Wed 04-Nov-15 22:45:26

Worst gift is difficult to describe but was m and s underwear. Two body type suits, both the same, one grey and one cream. They were like cotton jersey swimming costumes with embroidered flowers on (kid you not). No shaping whatsoever so had the flatten your boobs effect. Don't know if he thought I had the power of falsies or what!

I had no choice, sometimes you just have to say. In fairness the material felt soft n lovely but so does a fleece jumper.

He has no right to get in a strop, you said no, he's trying to make out he did a great thing for you, but actually his behaviour sounds a little bit controlling (presuming he got your no text prior to purchase)

bloodyteenagers Wed 04-Nov-15 22:47:36

As a lover, they should respect their partner and understand regardless of context no means no.. When she said no she didn't want the dress he should have respected her opinion and not bought it. Instead he said fuck you, I don't care what you want I am going to buy it anyway..
Now he is sulking because again she has said no. This is not acceptable and the op and others shouldn't put up and accept this rubbish.

Mmmmcake123 Wed 04-Nov-15 22:47:38

I still wonder today how m and s were even selling them. Can't think of any woman they would have looked good on.

SlightF0x Wed 04-Nov-15 22:49:00

a dress from a supermarket that you didn't ask for and haven't tried on, and he's annoyed with you that you're not grateful??? shock

Mmmmcake123 Wed 04-Nov-15 22:50:29

I agree bloody, sorry to other posters that think it's nice and she should try it on etc or be grateful, but I really disagree, if you go along with things like this you are not letting him know you take your own opinions seriously as an adult.

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