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People that refuse to go anywhere not nt as they have nt membership

(68 Posts)
Oolva Fri 30-Oct-15 20:21:27

This really boils my wee. I'm my group of friends some insist on going to the same nt places we've been to many times before rather than trying somewhere new as "its not nt so would be wasting money".

They aren't being logical right?

Sirzy Fri 30-Oct-15 20:22:27

Perhaps they can't afford to go elsewhere?

EWLT Fri 30-Oct-15 20:23:48

Do you mean during the week when it's just mums and kids?

I always tried to do those trips as economically as possible, it didn't seem right to be splashing out on outings that dh couldn't attend

TiggyD Fri 30-Oct-15 20:24:02

Most illogical Captain.

The non-NT people should go out and have fun times without the NT hard-liners one day.

Oolva Fri 30-Oct-15 20:24:21

They can afford it. They just think going anywhere not nt is a waste of money.

winewolfhowls Fri 30-Oct-15 20:25:02

I love the nt though and they do so many kids activities so yabu sorry!

In fact I would love to work for them
Perhaps money is a bit tight on the run up to Christmas for your friends? Also maybe location plenty parking etc are a consideration?

ilovesooty Fri 30-Oct-15 20:28:03

Perhaps they have a tighter budget than you?

SurlyCue Fri 30-Oct-15 20:28:30

They can afford it. They just think going anywhere not nt is a waste of money.

Theyre entitled to think that. Its an opinion. You cant say theyre wrong just because you disagree.

Cant you go to where you want to go without them? I never go to stuff like that with other families. Just me and DC.

pinotblush Fri 30-Oct-15 20:28:58

what does nt mean?

ilovesooty Fri 30-Oct-15 20:29:52

National Trust

DinosaursRoar Fri 30-Oct-15 20:39:21

well... it depends, once you've got NT membership, it's then free to do those days out compared to doing anything else, so if you were planning on say, going to walk round some woods or formal gardens of a country house that's not NT and they'd have to pay for it, I can see why "walk in the woods that's free vs one that'll cost me a £20" makes the 'free' one seems good, and the one that's going to cost £20 does need to be significantly more interesting to make it worth while. (and once you've got NT membership you will spend a lot of time going round formal gardens in a variety of locations, getting to the point that they are all a bit 'samey')

However, if they are turning down ideas of doing stuff that's different, say, going to a science museum, or an art gallery, or taking the DCs bowling, then yes, they are being U.

So what is it you want to do with them? Is it you want to go look at some English Heritage places instead or are they really not interested in doing days out that aren't of the "formal gardens or woods and big old house to wander round" variety?

Oolva Fri 30-Oct-15 20:40:43

*In fact I would love to work for them
Perhaps money is a bit tight on the run up to Christmas for your friends? Also maybe location plenty parking etc are a consideration?*

The non nt place is even closer than the nt place that they want to now go to instead and has ample parking. The one person that is really digging her heals has just bought a new high end car and is talking about the holidays she's having next year. She can afford £5.5 but just sees it as a waste.

Hassled Fri 30-Oct-15 20:43:10

The problem with having NT membership (we do) is that you then live your life plagued with guilt that you're paying for something you don't really need and can't really justify. While I do love a stately home, supporting them is not really the same as supporting the Red Cross. So then the least you can do is slavishly traipse around the stately homes in a desperate bid to make yourself feel less shite. Going to see an English Heritage place is like rubbing salt into an already open wound.

EWLT Fri 30-Oct-15 20:44:52

Not wasting money is how people manage to buy high end cars and good holidays.Look after the pennies and the pounds...it's amazing how much £5 here and there adds up to.

Bottom line is that she doesn't want to go enough to spend £5.50, so go without her

DinosaursRoar Fri 30-Oct-15 20:46:14

Well, is the non-NT place going to be a meet up so the DCs can run around some woods and a chat, perhaps with a brew and a slice of cake?

If it's not going ot be some place that's genuinely of interest and is just a big space for DCs to meet up, then I can see why she'd consider £5.50 a waste of money if she could do exactly the same for free elsewhere. Being able to afford something doesn't stop you viewing it as a waste of money if you feel you can get the same thing for free or less...

SurlyCue Fri 30-Oct-15 20:46:16

Fucking hell. I hate these threads with people whingeing about someone else not spending their own money how they OP wants them to and then the OP produces 'evidence' that they are well off and frivolous with their money in other areas. Guess what? They get to be. Its their money. They can spend or not spend it where and how they like.

pinotblush Fri 30-Oct-15 20:48:20

Thanks Sooty! I googled it and it came up National Theatre :S

SurlyCue Fri 30-Oct-15 20:50:09

Also at times like halloween, christmas etc the NT properties usually put on crafts or spooky walks and things. i bought my NT membership specifically so i could take DC to these things and not be out a fortune every time. I would see it as an absolute waste to pay money to do these same things elsewhere.

waitingforcalpoltowork Fri 30-Oct-15 20:51:04

you should get different friends

SantasLittleMonkeyButler Fri 30-Oct-15 20:52:30

Yes, I understand about wanting to get value for money from an NT membership something I've not yet managed. But isn't it selfish of OP's friends to always want to go to their choice of venue and never OP's?

Shouldn't they go where she wants once in a while too?

Oolva Fri 30-Oct-15 20:53:15

The problem with having NT membership (we do) is that you then live your life plagued with guilt that you're paying for something you don't really need and can't really justify. While I do love a stately home, supporting them is not really the same as supporting the Red Cross. So then the least you can do is slavishly traipse around the stately homes in a desperate bid to make yourself feel less shite. Going to see an English Heritage place is like rubbing salt into an already open wound.

Its that exactly. I have nt membership but I still go to non nt places as not everywhere is nt and I'm not going to deprive myself of visiting the ninety percent of places out that aren't nt.

It's just a shame if some of us did splinter off, we dont get to meet regularly and wouldn't feel right. They are entitled to be mean with money, but I'm entitled to moan if it negitvly affects me.

DinosaursRoar Fri 30-Oct-15 20:55:00

Santas - yes, but then they are also free to say, "hmm, bit expensive for what it is" - OP, have you thought of suggesting other free days out? Any parks or free museums near you that you could suggest?

SurlyCue Fri 30-Oct-15 20:57:21

But isn't it selfish of OP's friends to always want to go to their choice of venue and never OP's?

More selfish than OP insisting they spend money they dont want to spend because its what she wants?

Everyone has a choice. They arent being selfish to say "we are going to NT on monday" just as OP isnt being selfish to say "we are going to not NT property on monday" both would be selfish to insist either goes where the other decides. OP has a choice not to go to NT. I assume friends arent forcing her.

EWLT Fri 30-Oct-15 20:57:30

The great thing about meet ups is it doesn't really matter where you go, it's the company that makes the day, so I'd see spending more than necessary as a waste too.

Spending £££ is for when you have dc to entertain on your own grin

SurlyCue Fri 30-Oct-15 20:58:26

They are entitled to be mean with money, but I'm entitled to moan if it negitvly affects me

In what way are you being negatively affected?

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