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Friend wanting to be picked up from airport late at night

(103 Posts)
BeadyEyes Wed 28-Oct-15 11:05:32

A good friend of ours is coming back from a trip and his flight was supposed to land at 10:30pm. DH very kindly agreed to go and pick him up from the airport (10 miles away). Now it transpires that the plane is over an hour late and will be getting in close to midnight. We have two young kids one of whom is very unsettled at night. The reason a friend doesn't want to get a taxi is the cost (not huge). DH is too nice to refuse!

By way of background, both us and our friend and his wife (one child) earn about the same amount of money ( not much) but they also own (no mortgage) two impressively expensive houses while we are paying off a mortgage on a cramped little house...in other words, I'd just pay for a cab and wouldn't expect a lift!

AIBU to be pissed off at my friend for having the cheek to ask, and still expect to be picked up even when the flight is delayed?

DamnBamboo Wed 28-Oct-15 11:07:22

Well you've offered now, so you should go. Why are you pissed off he asked. You could have just said no.
Perhaps in future you just say no, or agree that should a flight be delayed, he needs to find his own way back.

ragged Wed 28-Oct-15 11:09:12

Sounds like an arrangement between 2 friends (your DH & his friend). What difference does it make to you if your husband is out late?

Mind, Costs me £25-£35 to take the taxi 15 miles. Pennies compared to cost of flight so I wouldn't have asked either.

SoDiana Wed 28-Oct-15 11:09:57

Gosh. How mean. Of you .

WorraLiberty Wed 28-Oct-15 11:10:04

Well your DH agreed to do it for whatever reason, so it's probably him you should be annoyed at (if you want to be annoyed at all).

There's always a real possibility that a flight won't land on time, which your DH obviously knew when he agreed.

ImperialBlether Wed 28-Oct-15 11:10:19

So this friend, who's quite well off, wants your husband, who isn't well off, to drive around picking him up, just to save some money?

If I were your DH I'd send a message saying sorry, it's too late, get a taxi.

AliciaMayEmory Wed 28-Oct-15 11:10:27

Well, he can't help that his flight is delayed! Not sure why having young kids is a problem in your DH picking up a friend from the airport. I wouldn't think twice about picking up a friend from the airport of DH was home to look after the dc, regardless of how money the friend earned or how many houses they had. But then I am of the mind that friends do nice things to help each other.

YABU

caravanista13 Wed 28-Oct-15 11:11:08

It's what friends do.

EatShitDerek Wed 28-Oct-15 11:12:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SuburbanRhonda Wed 28-Oct-15 11:14:09

Surely your two DC would have been settled in bed by the original time of 10.30pm, so an hour later won't make any difference? confused

Wolfiefan Wed 28-Oct-15 11:16:22

Your friend is allowed to ask for a lift.
You are allowed to say no.

Once you've said yes YABU to bitch about it. Flights are often delayed. Just be glad it's only an hour.

MythicalKings Wed 28-Oct-15 11:16:43

YABVU. Friends do favours for friends.

SurlyCue Wed 28-Oct-15 11:16:48

What do your children have to do with it? confused

Friend cant help plane being delayed can he? If DH didnt/ doesnt want to give him a lift he should say no. It isnt difficult. Cant see what friend has done wrong here.

PaulAnkaTheDog Wed 28-Oct-15 11:17:20

Well don't you sound like a peach hmm

Their housing and money situation has precisely nada to do with your husband doing a friend a favour.

YABU.

AndNowItsSeven Wed 28-Oct-15 11:17:22

Yabu surely you can deal with your dc yourself if they are unsettled.

Utterlyclueless Wed 28-Oct-15 11:18:44

Flights can be delayed everyone knows that.

YABU

I also think it's unreasonable to talk about other peoples finances, that's just me though.

SurlyValentine Wed 28-Oct-15 11:19:02

YABU. Your DH made the arrangement with the friend, presumably without the caveat that if the flight was delayed the friend would need to make other arrangements. That's either an oversight on your DH's part, or he genuinely doesn't mind picking the friend up regardless of the time the flight lands. Because, you know, that's what friends do.

I don't see the relevance of how many unmortgaged houses your friend owns confused

Your unsettled DC would be unsettled whether your DH was leaving the house at 10pm or 11.30pm.

shutupanddance Wed 28-Oct-15 11:20:20

When you agreed you must gave realised the flight could be delayed.

PaulAnkaTheDog Wed 28-Oct-15 11:20:48

Perhaps they have no mortgage because they don't waste money on taxis when they have friends who kindly offer lifts? Definitely sounds like there is something else going on here OP. You sound resentful.

MaxPepsi Wed 28-Oct-15 11:20:55

I live near an airport. Approx 10 mins from my house.

10 minute taxi fares around us are approx £3-4

However, a 10 minute taxi fare from the airport is at least £20 if not more as they add on all the additional charges the airport costs. Everyone gets lifts to and from the airport from friends regardless of how wealthy they may or may not be as it's such a bloody rip off to get a taxi.

So, YABU!

SurlyCue Wed 28-Oct-15 11:21:33

This sounds like a case of "they earn/have more than us so how dare they ever ask us for anything"

SeveredHeadsDragOnTheFloor Wed 28-Oct-15 11:21:46

What have the children got to do with anything? Were you going to make it a fairly trip? confused

SeveredHeadsDragOnTheFloor Wed 28-Oct-15 11:22:42

DH is too nice to refuse!

No, your Dh is a normal decent human being who is honouring his offer of help.

overthemill Wed 28-Oct-15 11:24:29

How do you know this at 11.05 am? Are you not in UK? But he asked, DH said yes and now DH either texts him back saying ' sorry mate that's far too late for em, you'll have to get a cab' or goes anyway. Don't see what your earnings/ housing matter - I hate getting taxis late at night at airport - big queues and kerfuffal but it's up to your DH. I think YABU

LurkingOne Wed 28-Oct-15 11:24:51

YABU.

Unless the friend is the reason the flight is delayed, which I'm sure it's not.

You sound bitter about their housing situation. Plus surely the favour can be returned in future.

Unless your husband is picking him up by helicopter and has to land in your garden by your children's windows I have no idea what their sleeping patterns have to do with this.

Viviennemary Wed 28-Oct-15 11:25:49

I think the time to have refused was when your DH was asked. The plane is only an hour late which isn't that much. You sound very envious of your 'friends'. There will always be folk richer than you.

poocatcherchampion Wed 28-Oct-15 11:26:04

So clearly you don't like this friend. Or perhaps your husband.

Bimblywibble Wed 28-Oct-15 11:27:24

I thought this is a v normal favour to ask of family members, or by extension, friends.

Next time you go on hols, or otherwise need a slightly bigger favour than normal, don't be afraid to ask. It's nice to have some favours owed.

whatsfordinnertoday Wed 28-Oct-15 11:29:42

YABU Giving lifts to/from the airport is what my friends and I do for each other when possible. This year however my holiday flight back landed at 4am so I didn't ask and got a taxi as I thought it would be unreasonable considering she had work the next day. So I think it depends on circumstances (but not whether they have more or less money than me or whether they own their own home!)

Whatthefreakinwhatnow Wed 28-Oct-15 11:32:30

Erm, you are being massively unreasonable! Your DH made the arrangements to pick up his friend, he can't just decide not to do it now because it's a bit later than first thought, that would be a really shitty thing for a friend to do.

As for your kids, unless you are also out meaning they will be left alone I don't see what your DH being out has to do with it?! Surely it doesn't take both of you to settle the one that wakes?! confused How on earth do you cope if DH has an evening put with friends?! hmm

And you sound far too over invested in the friends financial situation! It makes you sound bitter and resentful, neither of which are attractive OP.

ScribblerOnTheRoof Wed 28-Oct-15 11:34:02

All depends really. I do not mind doing favours for friends. Unless its one of those friends who never repays the favour!

Your DH said yes already so petrol etc was never the issue. You are pissed because it is delayed an hour. There is a big difference between 10.30 and 11.30 though, he probably wouldn't get back until 1am.

Hey ho, you have already said yes.

What is your relationship like with these friends?

ScribblerOnTheRoof Wed 28-Oct-15 11:34:41

FWIW I do not think you are being massively unreasonable. You would be if you refused point blank to give a lift though

cece Wed 28-Oct-15 11:36:25

You sound tired.

Your DH is being kind and doing what friends do.

Crazypetlady Wed 28-Oct-15 11:37:41

YABU Delays happen.

Damselindestress Wed 28-Oct-15 11:38:05

Your DH agreed to pick the friend up, it's not the friend's fault the flight is delayed. It's a pain but these things happen. It's a one off so I would suck it up and just not agree to do it in future if it's such an issue. I don't think their finances really come into it because your DH had already agreed to do the pick up knowing they could afford a taxi, all that's changed is the time and that's out of their control.

tobysmum77 Wed 28-Oct-15 11:39:02

Its not the role of friends to be constantly on beck and call. That said its up to dh to either say yes or no.

LurkingOne Wed 28-Oct-15 11:41:38

It doesn't sound like "constantly at the beck and call" though, it's one favour!

tobysmum77 Wed 28-Oct-15 11:46:16

I agree lurking but some of the other posters as usual are from another universe. A friend imo would understand if you texted 'really sorry mate but I'm really, really knackered and have to get up early for work tomorrow' but it was dh's call.

Ilikedmyoldusernamebetter Wed 28-Oct-15 11:47:49

Presumably the unsettled sleeping child is relevant because the sound of her DH returning home is likely to wake him at 2am or whatever time...

Presumably the finances were referred to to indicate the friend can afford a taxi (driving to and from the airport and probably parking there are by no means free to the DH).

Assuming the trip is nothing to do with you I'd be hmm at being asked, in the context of the late night (even 10.30pm) arrival and the ability to afford a taxi. Its not as if he's coming to visit you. Presumably his wife could even have bundled their DC into the car and fetched him, if being fetched is important to him... your DH will be tired for work in the morning too.

On the other hand the onus was really on your DH to say no, sorry, in the first place.

DamnBamboo Wed 28-Oct-15 11:49:57

But he isn't knackered tobysmum
It's the OP that doesn't want him doing it because she feels resentful.
Clearly her DH doesn't mind.

BitOutOfPractice Wed 28-Oct-15 11:51:01

It's hardly the early hours of the morning is it? Not a lot to do for a friend.

"your DH will be tired for work in the morning too." Good grief. He might get in at midnight. Hardly the end of the world. Crikey!

tobysmum77 Wed 28-Oct-15 11:52:23

It would be for me, I don't deal with late nights. If that's what you expect from friends I'd be the wrong one for you!

SeveredHeadsDragOnTheFloor Wed 28-Oct-15 11:52:34

I agree lurking but some of the other posters as usual are from another universe. A friend imo would understand if you texted 'really sorry mate but I'm really, really knackered and have to get up early for work tomorrow' but it was dh's call.

And some posted seem to just make stuff up. Nowhere does it say the Dh is knackered and has to get up early for work.

DamnBamboo Wed 28-Oct-15 11:52:41

The airport is 10 miiles away.
Why would he be getting in at 2am?

TheTigerIsOut Wed 28-Oct-15 11:52:59

How petty... Of you.

What you earn or not doesn't matter, is not that he is dragging the poor children with him to pick up his friend, is it? Yes, he will be out one hour later than expected, can you survive?

Honestly, I always factor the cost of going to the airport when I budget for a holiday, I wouldn't dream of asking anyone but very close family to give me a lift to or from the airport, but I think your excuses to be annoyed are all wrong.

DamnBamboo Wed 28-Oct-15 11:53:41

Then say no tobysmum that is your prerogative!

The OPs DH said yes, that was his choice!

Ilikedmyoldusernamebetter Wed 28-Oct-15 11:55:10

No - the flight is getting in at midnight, he won't be out of the airport til nearer 1am if he has hold luggage bitout - the DH drives him home and then home himself from the friend's house - he'll be home not long before 2am probably, airport pick ups always take ages. Most people get up for work around 6.30am - 7am, and presumably the whole reason the unsettled sleeping child has been mentioned is that he'll wake when Daddy comes in and take a while to be re-settled, so very likely nobody will be back to sleep til 3am...

tobysmum77 Wed 28-Oct-15 11:56:51

Which I agree with its dh's choice.

The text was just an example, and meant for the people who seem to think that 'friends' should be willing to do anything for a favour.

'its what friends do' er no not in my world. I'm happy to do favours if it suits me but friends are not a free taxi service.

WorraLiberty Wed 28-Oct-15 11:58:07

The text was just an example, and meant for the people who seem to think that 'friends' should be willing to do anything for a favour.

Who said friends should be will to do anything for a favour? confused

AtSea1979 Wed 28-Oct-15 11:58:31

Yes some people are odd about airports and seem to always want a lift there and back rather than get a taxi or pay for parking like the rest of us.

tobysmum77 Wed 28-Oct-15 12:00:37

Caravanista

Eatshitderek

Want me to go on? hmm

AbeSaidYes Wed 28-Oct-15 12:03:43

would definitely pick a friend up from an airport only ten miles away and I am a pretty mean person.

YABU

WorraLiberty Wed 28-Oct-15 12:04:57

caravanista "It's what friends do."

EatShitDerek "Friends do shit like this for each other"

Yes, I think you might have to go on because nowhere can I find them saying "Friends should be willing to do anything for a favour"

smellylittleorange Wed 28-Oct-15 12:05:22

Lol intrigued how mean you are Abe

GoblinLittleOwl Wed 28-Oct-15 12:06:40

So it is all right for your husband to collect at 10.30 pm but not 11.30pm.
Don't get it.
And you can't cope with an unsettled child on your own in the evening for a few hours?

PrivatePike Wed 28-Oct-15 12:07:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NumbBlaseCold Wed 28-Oct-15 12:08:43

YANBU to be pissed off if you feel that way however it should be directed to yourself and your DH who agreed to this, not to the friend who just asked a favor.

You had the choice not too.

If your DH agrees to then that is his choice.

Do not offer or agree if you don't want to follow through.

Next time say No.

If you feel they take advantage of you then think, 'that's only because we let them'.

BerylCreep Wed 28-Oct-15 12:09:31

I would only agree to pick up from the airport if the person was actually staying with me.

I'd say no. Although it is really early in the day - how do they know that the flight is going to be over an hour late at this time of the day?

Alibabsandthe40Musketeers Wed 28-Oct-15 12:12:34

If I go on holiday I expect to sort out my own transport. I would expect everyone else to do the same.

There are a lot of favours that I would do for a friend, things which can't necessarily be achieved by spending money. Last minute childcare, dropping round bread/milk/calpol when they are stuck at home with ill children, writing them a character reference for a job - all kinds of things.

Picking them up from an airport late at night when a taxi would cost a fraction of the cost of the trip is not on the list, because it says that they value their own money ahead of my time and costs. Not the actions of a friend, IMO.

BadgersBum Wed 28-Oct-15 12:12:51

I only work part time, my friend has a very good full time job and earns 6 times as much as me. I'd still pick her up from the airport, even if she phoned as the plane landed, never mind if it had been arranged in advance, she'd probably insist on giving me petrol money though.

In fact, she once got me out of bed to go and let her dog out for a wee and give him some food, because she was stuck at the hospital with her DH who had had a major operation.

Both her and her DH have done favours for us loads of times in the past too, moved house for me, bought me essential household items (without being asked) when I left my ex etc. it's what you do.

Basically it's up to you, do it, don't do it, but if you chose the latter, as your friend I'd probably be very reluctant to return favours in the future.

tobysmum77 Wed 28-Oct-15 12:19:30

Basically it's up to you, do it, don't do it, but if you chose the latter, as your friend I'd probably be very reluctant to return favours in the future.

Tbh that's fine, I very rarely ask favours off friends and if I got the slightest vibe that you didn't want to I'd be fine with this.

I just wonder if the op was me saying:
'A friend agreed to look after my children in the school holidays while I went to work. This week I found out that the day she is looking after them I have to get to work an hour earlier than usual. She's now saying that she can't have them that early, I think she should have them anyway and get up earlier. AIBU?' I would be called all the rude entitled cahs under the sun.... And for the record like transport to the airport I sort out paid childcare!

tobysmum77 Wed 28-Oct-15 12:21:07

Worra hmm o....k..... You win well done you hmm

Favouritethings Wed 28-Oct-15 12:21:16

Your husband is a kind friend.. You on the other hand..

ElderlyKoreanLady Wed 28-Oct-15 12:23:29

An hour isn't a huge delay and let's face it, delays are very common. Your DH knew this was a possibility when he agreed.

Their mortages are completely irrelevant, as are their finances in general...if the friend isn't planning on carrying cash because he thinks he's getting a lift then being let down last minute means he runs the risk of not being able to get back if the airport cash point isn't working (the one at my local airport is comically bad). Doesn't matter how much is in the bank.

Are your children more unsettled at 11 than 10? And can you not handle that alone?

If there's nothing more to this than you're being unreasonable and resentful. Friends do favours for each other. This is a favour that your DH has agreed to do for his friend. An awful lot of people arrange lifts home from the airport rather than get taxis or pay for long term parking.

Anastasie Wed 28-Oct-15 12:24:09

It depends on the context. If these people have form for demanding favours and never offering any in return, then I can see your point.

If they are nice people who give as much as they take then that's fine.

NerrSnerr Wed 28-Oct-15 12:26:55

There always the chance that it was going to be late so that should have been taken into account when he agreed. It would be shit of him to let his friend down now.

putcustardonit Wed 28-Oct-15 12:28:06

I think i'd like to know the context here.

Did he ask or did DH offer?
Would he do the same for you?
Is it LH or SH?
How good a friend is he?

On the face of it it does seem a bit mean to now refuse but maybe there's more of a back story.

Ain626 Wed 28-Oct-15 12:38:43

I think if your DH had already agreed to pick the friend up, well, its because they are friends and not to do with the finances - so finances shouldn't come in to it. It's just a friend doing a favour for a friend.

If the flight is delayed then I'm assuming your DH doesn't need to leave the house until even later, therefore the DCs should definitely be asleep by the time he leaves. They don't even need to know that he is going to leave the house...

If I was the friend flying in then I probably would have called and explained that the flight was delayed and the new time. On realising that it was so late I would have said that I could get a cab if that's too late.

If I was the friend doing the picking up and receiving that call I probably would have said that I would pick them up anyway as that what I had agreed to do. Unless there was something very important happening early the next morning. In which case I probably would have said no to picking them up from the airport in the first place with a time of 10.30pm.

Friends help friends out.

IF it had been a situation where you've been in similar situations and the friends hadn't been so great at helping your family out (on several occasions) then maybe I'd be a bit pissed off. But otherwise I would say your DH is just doing a nice thing for his friend.

Utterlyclueless Wed 28-Oct-15 12:39:23

Toby you're over invested.

MackerelOfFact Wed 28-Oct-15 12:39:41

I don't understand why how much they earn in relation to you makes any difference - will it cost more to collect at 11.30 instead of 10.30?

Also - if the friend has let you know before the flight takes off that it's been delayed, your DH won't be out for any longer than he would have been.

However if DH didn't actually find out about the delay until he arrived at the airport, wouldn't it be a total waste of time and petrol to turn round and go back home again without collecting the friend for the sake of an hour?

Delays are annoying but they do happen. If he didn't want to do it, he shouldn't have agreed!

ConferencePear Wed 28-Oct-15 12:41:43

I live near an airport and I find that it can be a problem to find a taxi on the rank that will take you a short distance. They all want to get a fare that will be going a long way. It's a kind thing to do to pick your friend up and he may be able to repay the favour some time.

DamnBamboo Wed 28-Oct-15 12:49:05

Toby, honestly! hmm calm down!

You suggest a sample text for the DH to get out of it (even though he said he would) and then starting adding in a whole bunch of other stuff that nobody has even intimated.

You wouldn't do it. You would say no. Good for you.

Bimblywibble Wed 28-Oct-15 13:00:32

I think it doesn't help that you're asking a population who's 99% female.

Alibabs lists favours she'd do - emergency childcare, dropping round groceries, writing character references. Apart from the last, my very unenlightened dad would never dream of doing those favours for anyone. He never does a jot of housework and he never cooks a meal. But picking people up from the airport he has done dozens of times, even in the middle of the night. I think it's a sort of gallantry kind of thing. And he does it gladly. He'd never expect my mum or me to do the same, but he asks my brother to and my bro does because he is returning past favours.

I'm not saying it's right, I'd prefer to have grown up in a less sexist household. But I do think this has historically been a more "blokey" favour and a mainly male audience would be more inclined to think of this as a more run of the mill thing for the friend to ask, and for your DH to do.

ScarletRuby2 Wed 28-Oct-15 13:16:42

I would (and have done) picked friends up at the airport in the early hours of the morning. In fact I'm taking the afternoon off work tomorrow to pick my friends parents up from the airport. But that's the kind of relationship we have. I don't know if that's the same for you.

However I do think YABU because you are looking for excuses why your DH shouldn't do it. Your financials and children have absolutely nothing to do with this, and I agree there is clearly something else going on here.

NorbertDentressangle Wed 28-Oct-15 13:23:34

I don't get your concern OP . Does your DH turn into a pumpkin at midnight?

Surely it's no later than if he was to go out for a few drinks or a meal (but this will be without the hangover/fuzzy head the next day).

It's not going to affect you or your children. He's doing a favour for a friend who would presumably do a favour for your DH in return if he ever needed it.

Namechangenell Wed 28-Oct-15 13:24:21

I think in the days when flying was far more glamorous and people flew less often, it was a big thing to collect someone from the airport. These days, it's like jumping on a bus for many people and so there's hardly the same kudos attached. If I fly, I get a cab at the other end. Or hire a car. Or jump on a train. I don't expect someone else to go out of their way to give me a lift, in exactly the same way I wouldn't if I needed to go on a long motorway journey. Why make someone else responsible for getting me from A-B? Just because a big metal tube in the sky is involved, it doesn't change anything!

OP - YABU now as your DH agreed. However, I think his friend was cheeky to ask when it hardly sounds like he's landing in Luanda at 3am.

SoDiana Wed 28-Oct-15 13:25:14

I'm wondering how your meagre earnings afford them two expensive houses lol.
You are oozing envy.

Ilikedmyoldusernamebetter Wed 28-Oct-15 13:38:20

Badgers

*In fact, she once got me out of bed to go and let her dog out for a wee and give him some food, because she was stuck at the hospital with her DH who had had a major operation.

Both her and her DH have done favours for us loads of times in the past too, moved house for me, bought me essential household items (without being asked) when I left my ex etc. it's what you do.*

Those things are what friends do.

Picking somebody up at midnight on a week night from an airport when they are not staying with you and they could get a taxi for not too much money is what mugs do.

I do lots of favours for people, but being a capable adult's taxi service in the middle of the night solely because they cba or are too tight to get a taxi (when they are not starting nor ending their journey at my house, and there is no reason such as needing to accommodate wheelchairs or children needing car seats to make picking up any taxi off the rank a bad idea) is not one of them.

ragged Wed 28-Oct-15 13:48:10

We live 4 hours (minimum) drive from the big London airports & I know people who have done the drive for visiting relatives & friends. Public transport links are pretty good to get here, btw.

I think my dad is a bit sad that I won't drive 8 hrs round trip to fetch him if he arrives to Heathrow. That would have been with my many children under 10 in the car.

Collaborate Wed 28-Oct-15 13:49:45

I wouldn't have offered to give them lift in the first place. I would prefer to pay for someone to get a taxi than have to get up in the night to travel there and back myself. Their journey - their responsibility to sort it out. I'd do it for family visiting us, but they're not visiting you.

My parents had a thing about offering lifts to the airport at all hours, and expecting to be offered lifts in return. We just started getting taxis.

roaringfire Wed 28-Oct-15 13:51:35

This is why they have more money than you. They ask for favours which save them money. Just make sure you ask for a similar money saving favour.

LovelyFriend Wed 28-Oct-15 13:59:19

So you don't think your DH should honor his commitment to his very good friend because the plane is an hour late, you don't feel comfortable being alone in your house with your children after midnight in case they are unsettled, and you pay a mortgage on your tiny house while your friend doesn't pay a mortgage on his two mansions?

Wow what a minefield to be walking around with this maelstrom of feelings.

Next time suggest your "very good friend" jumps in a cab.

This time however your DH would be unreasonable to break his promise on the grounds you have laid out in this thread which kind of amount to "my wife doesn't think you are deserving of the help I am happy to offer you".

But you are of course free to keep on being pissed off about the situation.

PrimalLass Wed 28-Oct-15 14:15:58

I would think your DH's friend is being a tosser tbh. He should just man up and get a taxi for goodness sake.

SurlyCue Wed 28-Oct-15 14:24:35

Just thinking about this. I have a very large family and some have moved across to england to live. It is quite common for someone to send a group text or FB post around asking of anyone is able to do an airport run for them. Some of my friends do this too. Half 10 at night wouldnt be possible for me as i am a lone parent and DC in bed but others can and do do it. Ive never heard any grumbling about it based on mortages and income. Or any grumbling in fact. If we can, we just do it. The airport is 45-60 minutes away depending on time of day.

kali110 Wed 28-Oct-15 14:42:34

Sounds like your dh is simply being a decent friend/human being.
My friend is not well off, however she still offes to drive me to docs, hospital and the shops. Never wants money from me.
It's what friends do for each other.
Your dp offered, as friends do.
It's not his friends fault that the plane is delayed.
Sounds more like resentment.

Johnny5isAlive Wed 28-Oct-15 15:06:12

Are you sure friend still wants collecting? Have you seen the msg? Who's to say the friend didn't say "flight will be 1 he late so don't worry, I'll get a taxi" and your DH was the one who insisted?

cleaty Wed 28-Oct-15 15:10:57

YABU. This is what friends do. I have given and picked up friends from the airport and vice versa. I don't care how much they earn.

coconutpie Wed 28-Oct-15 15:20:26

YANBU. Collecting someone from an airport at 10.30pm at night is quite a big inconvenience as it is, but collecting at midnight is just ridiculous - the friend should be telling your DH that he'll sort a taxi as it is too late for your DH to be driving to the airport.

ScarletRuby2 Wed 28-Oct-15 16:06:39

Thanks Badgers I'll remember that my friends and I are being mugs when we do favours like this for each other. confused

SilverShadows Wed 28-Oct-15 16:14:34

We have had several lifts the the airport from friends (90 min round trip) and have also given several lifts over the years. To me, this is normal and duty free is bought as a thank you instead of having to pay airport parking/taxis.

I'd be pretty pissed off if I got off the plane to a text at midnight, having just been on a delayed flight, to be told my pre arranged lift wasn't coming.

Delays happen. it just means you owe/are owed a bigger favour for the next time

AwfulBeryl Wed 28-Oct-15 16:15:02

This is the sort of favour I have done for friends and family and have also asked for.
It doesn't bother me, I quite like helping out people that I care about, it doesn't matter if they help me in return, I don't see it as a debt.
It is nice to know that you've got people who have got your back if you need it.

PuppyMonkey Wed 28-Oct-15 16:27:12

This is the sort of thing DP does, he's always volunteering to do favours for others - but then, he moans about it to me about how difficult it's going to be for him etc. hmm

Taking the neighbour's rubbish to a tip.
Volunteering to drive a hired van and help my sister move house.
Putting a new shed up for his mum.

All things he's volunteered to do this year which he has moaned about non-stop.confused

I've told him he's banned from doing any other favours for the next six months.

Jux Wed 28-Oct-15 16:37:01

DH does this for anyone who flieS in to our local airport. I think you're being very unreasonable. People do that sort of thing for each other.

JoySzasz Wed 28-Oct-15 16:51:37

So op what do you think now?

Lollipopgirl8 Wed 28-Oct-15 16:54:24

Gosh
Typical pettiness from a female... I say this because of the reference to earnings/house values

Most men couldn't care less about this and your dh probably still quite happy to give the lift... Afterall you don't know when you might need the favour returned

Anastasie Wed 28-Oct-15 17:01:33

What a bloody stupid post.

DamnBamboo Wed 28-Oct-15 17:03:43

Has the OP even been back?

MoriartyIsMyAngel Wed 28-Oct-15 18:33:22

Your DH offered, right? The friend didn't ask?

To be honest, he could turn up at 10:30pm then find it had been delayed by a couple of hours anyway! These things happen.

GreyBird84 Wed 28-Oct-15 19:35:52

OP i have many 'friends' who let em down. They seem to be Abel to justify it by saying my life is so rosey it's not a big deal when they cancel spa days the night before, don't book the table they said they would for my birthday.

I have organised 3 big friends birthday celebrations & no one other than my husband & family have done so for me.

It's hurts, it really fucking hurts. So don't think that material possessions & what you view as an easy life means it's ok to let a friend down because it's not.

AlwaysHope1 Wed 28-Oct-15 19:53:30

How spiteful of op to be bitter about how much the friend earns. You had better hope you never need a favour in your life.

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