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To be annoyed by lost clothes

(13 Posts)
lisa2104 Tue 27-Oct-15 15:36:01

My sil is nanny and one of her charges is my dd, three mornings a week. She changed her trousers one day and although I've said not to wash her stuff to prevent confusion (she looks after 7 kids, one around the same age) she did and left them at the house in a box where she keeps dd's stuff (unlabelled) ready for me to pick up on Monday. Meanwhile another parent changed his dd and got some clothes from that area. Trousers now missing. Ordinarily I'd be irritated but suck it up but the trousers were jeggings from Boots (good quality), cost £10, brand new and worn that day for the first time. I bought them to go with a blouse I'd bought and never even saw her in them. Anyway she has asked about them and the other family will have a check through their washing. I asked today and she said this woman had been working nine hours the previous day and trousers are not her priority. That's understandable but when I said to give it a few days I got a text back saying she understands I'm not being difficult but maybe I should dress her in old clothes in future to prevent anxiety over losing clothes and she doesn't get this off the other families, they have loads of money and leave her to buy their clothes anyway. She said that when people haven't seen their kids all day looking for clothes are not a priority. That is understandable but I feel like I'm being made to feel I'm being heartless. She offered to pay begrudgingly but I'm worried that will cause tension in the family. I'm just wondering aibu to think I don't want my child walking about in old worn clothes and I should have to foot the bill for clothes I haven't lost?

Sirzy Tue 27-Oct-15 15:38:46

Never send your child to a childcare setting in clothes you care about. Things will go missing, get covered in evidence of fun days or get damaged.

A young child really doesn't care if they are in old warn clothes!

rainydaygrey Tue 27-Oct-15 15:40:18

She's being ridiculous.

I work a lot more than 9 hours most days, and I would still prioritise looking for someone else's clothes if I'd taken them home for whatever reason.

1 pair of nice trousers got lost at the childminder's, they were very apologetic and did not try to suggest that my priorities were out of order for mentioning it. Yes things get lost, but there's no need for her to be patronising about it.

LadyLonely1 Tue 27-Oct-15 15:40:54

Honestly just let it go. Lesson learnt for you is just send her in clothes that you expect to get lost/messed up. Why cause an issue over a pair of pants.

rainydaygrey Tue 27-Oct-15 15:41:37

Oh but YABU to not want your DD wearing old worn clothes. That's what she SHOULD be wearing at day care!

WorraLiberty Tue 27-Oct-15 15:42:36

I'm with your SIL on this.

Why do you need to send her to a childcare setting in clothes you care about?

And why weren't her clothes labelled with her name?

Fieryfighter Tue 27-Oct-15 15:44:43

Hopefully the jeggings will turn up but is definitely be sending your DD in clothes you care less about in future.

In my house thee kids know to wear 'dad' clothes if they're going to their dad's overnight as if decent stuff goes rubbish stuff comes back! Bit different I know but having some 'old' clothes for certain things does cause less stress in the end.

Gileswithachainsaw Tue 27-Oct-15 15:46:37

Yanbu to be annoyed someone won't look for clothes that aren't theirs. that's rude and basically theft.

yabvvvvu to send your chikd in new expensive clothing to a day care setting. honestly supermarket joggers and t shirts and all the stained old stuff that still fits is what you send them in.

imagine if you had 7 kids to look after and had to keep track.of next/boden/JL clothes.

go to primark and buy a shit load of leggins and joggers and t shirts that are cheap and cheerful and won't matter if they get lost or stained etc.

GoblinLittleOwl Tue 27-Oct-15 16:37:03

Were they named?

NotMeNotYouNotAnyone Tue 27-Oct-15 16:47:25

Yabvvu to send her in unlabelled clothes
And yabu to send her in nice clothes

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant Tue 27-Oct-15 16:54:25

Posh clothes are for home.
Old or pre-loved clothes are for nursery/getting painty/muddy...

If dd comes home from nursery in nursery clothes ( accident, paint etc), her clothes are put into her bag. The nursery ones get washed when I next load the washer and returned in a few days.

Learn from it. Don't send her in new clothes. Kids like to get messy sometimes, without worrying about their clothes!

Hope they show up in the next few days?

gabsdot45 Tue 27-Oct-15 17:26:33

I'm on your side. YANBU. My DD left a cardigan at a neighbours house during the summer. It was definitely left there because that's the only place she was. I went back to the house. The mother said she'd look for it. I asked again same thing, anyway. It's never been seen since. And this is not the only time things like this have happened. And don't get me started on clothes left at school which are never seen again. BTW All my kids clothes are labelled.
It's not that hard to find clothes that don't belong to your children.

Osolea Tue 27-Oct-15 17:45:25

YANBU to be annoyed, but when you know that there is plenty of potential for confusion, you should be labelling your dds clothes.

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