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Home alone anxiety.

(11 Posts)
Blueboys Thu 22-Oct-15 21:12:59

Hi all. Just typed this all out and it crashed so here goes again but will try and keep it short. Since having my two children (2&3) I have become anxiouse about things. I'm overwhelmed that these two little people's lives are in my hands and its scarey, I'm sure we all feel this way at times. This evening a young lady came to the door obviously selling stuff as we saw her heading up our drive. Husband leapt up to answer as if he was going to take glee in saying 'no thanks' I told him to just do that or leave the door. It was dinner time and a bit busy/chaotic. He was out there for about 5 mins and she was showing her cleaning products off. (I am feeling better already just typing this and realising that I am most probably just being really stupid). He went off leaving the door wide open downstairs (I now know to get her some change). She said Im not begging, no one around here wants to help me, you all have your drive ways with lots of cars but no one will help me. My son has then gone to the door and my husband said t him 'get in!' She was walking off and thought he was talking to get then gave my husband a bit of lip, cue him barking 'get off of my property, if I want anything I will go the the shops!!' I'm then in tears petrified that she'll come back and get us, go back and tell her partner and do something to us, the house, I don't know! I'm massively pissed of with my husband as alough I was in the front room with the door closed so missed most of their original chat, I feel may have led her on a bit, I don't know. I'm sure he could have just immediately said thanks but no thanks. This isn't an is my DH an arse thread but back to my anxiety. He's away from early in the morning for the weekend and I'm now scared of staying here alone with the children incase they come back. I said to him imagine if that were me and I went home and told you a man started shouting at me. At times I just don't think he thinks about us and puts us at risk. I started crying telling him I'm worried they'll come back saying I think you antagonised her, you're not going to be here if they do, lots of tears from me. AIBU being scared staying at home now while he's away, wouldn't be so bad just me but it's having my babies here. Am I just being a stupid anxious worrier sad. I'm sorry I'm not sure what I am hoping for posting or what I am really asking/saying or if any of this even makes sense. I hate him going away as it is and don't sleep well. Pre children, I loved it!!! Tempted to go to a local hotel bit that brings other anxieties up. Ahh such an arse why didn't I get to the door and just say thank you but no thank you, bye bye.

DoveCazzoEIlMioCaffe Thu 22-Oct-15 21:21:06

I feel like your anxiety is probably ruining your life - to an extent anyway and it might be an idea to talk to someone about that. Doctor maybe? Of course we all get a bit like that when we have little ones but this, I think, is a bit OTT.
If it was one of those people selling dusters and shit and supposedly for charity then it's a scam anyway - perhaps a call to the non-emergency Police line to register your concerns?

DrasticAction Thu 22-Oct-15 21:28:50

Op round my way the police are very hot on what they call Nottingham Knockers, they are bascially sussing out the house to rob stuff.

without a doubt call 101!! do it now!

we always have a spate of bulgaries when they have been round.

our police immediately go out looking for them, our local FB page always tells us when they are around and in which road.

as for anxiety ruining your life? I think thats a bit OTT. You had a stranger come to the door, your dh didn't handle it well your little one ran off...your probably v tired and pushed to the limits by your young dc...I wouldn't have been happy either!

He didnt handle it well and your rightly worried about come back.

What you have to do now, is simply call 101, report the Knocker grin then calm down, re the weekend.

i get anxious around young dc because they are un controllable and un predictable little wild savages ( bless them). Dont worry op.. your dh did something silly..

DrasticAction Thu 22-Oct-15 21:29:50

sorry to add the little savages add a silly thoughtless dh....

Mintyy Thu 22-Oct-15 21:32:24

Is there a sockie thing going on on this thread?

DoveCazzoEIlMioCaffe Thu 22-Oct-15 21:33:46

What makes you think that Mintyy?

Mintyy Thu 22-Oct-15 21:40:33

Because of very long reply backing up/stoking up op's anxiety within a matter of minutes.

Blueboys Thu 22-Oct-15 21:51:02

Excuse my ignorance but what does sockie mean?

Thank you for the reply, anger management for dh and docs for me maybe. I'm 99% of the time OK and wouldn't say my anxiety is ruining my life, maybe just evening/weekend on this occasion. Thanks Drastic will go and check my local Fb site, they all love a bit of curtain twitching.

Senpai Fri 23-Oct-15 05:50:25

So basically...

A person came to the door.
Your husband listened politely while she gave her spiel.
He went and got some change, instead of buying a product.
She reacted badly because she felt patronized, and he returned the aggression.

Sounds like a typical "sale". I'm sure door-to-door people are used to rude people, they'd have to be in their line of work. DH was a door-to-door salesman for a legit company as a teen, and he got all sorts of strange people.

The woman is just going to go home and vent to her husband about shitty people just like my DH vents about shitty customers to me.

No one is going to come to your door because frankly, it's not worth the trouble (and it would be very easy to trace the crime back to them). If someone was a jerk to me, I'd probably mark the house off my list of places to sell.

Worst case scenario they come back, don't answer the door and call the police.

In the mean time, you might want to think about seeing a GP for therapy/meds. Or have a glass of wine if this is just a once in a while thing. It can't be fun being on the edge of your seat all the time like this though.

Brioche201 Fri 23-Oct-15 06:32:55

She win at come back to ' get you' I promise!

Blueboys Fri 23-Oct-15 07:16:25

Thanks guys. Feel better, slept on it and venting here and reading this out helped me realise I'm being ott. Looked on our local fb group and it seems every now and then a van load get dropped off in the area to do this. I did think she is probably used to stroppy customers and with her view of our villagers it doesn't sound like he was the first. Husbands gone off now apologised and said he would do anything for us and I was a good wife and didn't moan back that he wouldn't. Just feel a massive idiot as sent my mum a text asking if we could stay with her a night or two as husband pissed off a door sales person and I was scared to be alone, she will probably the ignore that message anyway. Will just stay on a relaxed look out and make the most of two nights of watching what I want on TV and do a bit of research on dealing with anxieties. Thank you.

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