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DH won't ask for owings

(11 Posts)
lenleeds Thu 22-Oct-15 09:43:53

We moved house recently and wanted to sell our furniture from old house. My BIL offered to buy them at a reduced price, and seeing as he was family we accepted this offer. I know that he doesn't have a whole lot of money.

So he's taken the furniture to his and his girlfriends house, and so far has not paid us. He's since broken up with girlfriend, doesn't know if he's staying in the house and has not mentioned paying us for the furniture.

My husband will not ask him about it as he says he's going through a bad time etc etc. I would normally be happy to wait, but our finances are stretched to breaking point and we have a little girl, and to be honest her needs in my view trump everyone elses.

He keeps promising to speak to him but never does - AIBU to think he should just do it. He seems to think I'm being mercenary and unkind.

Only1scoop Thu 22-Oct-15 09:48:20

Is it quite a bit of money? Could he pay in installments?

What was the agreement made by your dh and his bro?

lenleeds Thu 22-Oct-15 09:49:58

It's £600, it was meant to be paid back over two months

QuintShhhhhh Thu 22-Oct-15 09:50:12

Can you ask him to either pay or bring it back so you can sell it again?

mickeysminnie Thu 22-Oct-15 09:52:15

Can you ask him to either pay or bring it back so you can sell it again?


lenleeds Thu 22-Oct-15 09:54:59

I want to, but my husband will not say anything at all at the moment however much I ask him too. I worry that if I say anything it could cause lots of tension with that side of the family, and it's really important to me that we have a good relationship for my daughter's sake. It has to come from him really.

QuintShhhhhh Thu 22-Oct-15 10:07:14

The tension has already been caused by him taking your furniture and not paying.

If you are threading on eggshells with his family, maybe you need to reconsider whether your daughter NEED so much contact with them.

What made you feel you HAD to sell to him?

lenleeds Thu 22-Oct-15 10:19:15

It just seemed like a nice thing to do - and at the time I thought it would save us the bother of selling them privately. I like his family, they are nice people - it's just such a different dynamic to my own.

If for example, my sister wanted to buy something from us, she wouldn't do so unless she could afford to pay us there and then. I'm the same. I hate owing people things.

I'm fed up really, my husband hates confrontation, I feel I can't say anything, and my daughter needs things like a footmuff for her pram etc, which we're having to delay buying for her because we don't have this money.

Charlesroi Thu 22-Oct-15 10:26:26

Could you get your husband to agree to ask for - say - £30 a week? At least get him paying something so it doesn't get forgotten about.
I used to have an OH who was generous on my behalf and it was very annoying (and expensive).

NewNameNotTheSame Thu 22-Oct-15 10:32:33

Nope, sorry. I'd bring it up myself if my spineless husband wouldn't. If my husband was happy for his own daughter to go without just so he doesn't look unkind I would be furious.

He needs to either start paying or return so you can sell them.

Defenderwife Thu 22-Oct-15 10:46:29

I agree with obers. You need the money or the furniture back. The longer it is ignored the worse it will become. Good luck.

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