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To have a cuddle in bed with nearly 13yo ds?

(127 Posts)
ScottishGlen Sun 18-Oct-15 21:15:17

My dc have always enjoyed snuggling in bed with dh and I - usually on a weekend morning before everyone gets up. We didn't co-sleep except when the dc were ill.

My ds is nearly 13. He will sometimes join me in bed for 5-10 minutes when he gets up, before going downstairs to make his breakfast. He lays next to me with an arm round my middle - sometimes snoozing and sometimes having a chat. I cherish these times as they are very peaceful and cosy. Sometimes he will tell me about what he is looking forward to at school and if there is anything worrying him this is likely to be the time he tells me.

I thought nothing of this until reading an article in the newspaper about a lady who was on Loose Women. She said she co-slept with her children until they were nearly 10 and received a lot of criticism for doing this.

It made me wonder about ds. What do you think?

edwinbear Sun 18-Oct-15 21:16:50

I hope ds and dd are still doing this when they are 13. I can't imagine a more delicious way to start the weekend.

HPsauciness Sun 18-Oct-15 21:18:10

Completely normal, I think? At least my children (10 and 12) get into bed with me and snuggle up.

They don't co-sleep at that age, but bed is a place to hang out, play on tablets, have a cuddle and a chat.

JoeMommuh Sun 18-Oct-15 21:18:15

Sounds divine... Hope my sons will cuddle me at 13. They're only preschool age now. You're very lucky sounds like a lovely relationship.

Welshmaenad Sun 18-Oct-15 21:18:32

It's a sad world when you can't cwtch your kids without being judged and criticised.

It sounds lovely OP and should continue as long as you're both happy.

gamerchick Sun 18-Oct-15 21:18:41

Make the most of it, because in a few years it's hard to pin them down for a hug never mind a cuddle.

FattyNinjaOwl Sun 18-Oct-15 21:20:02

I would still climb in bed with my mum up until I was 16 and pregnant!
My DB co slept every night until he was 8. Then he would still climb in from time to time after that.

CharleyDavidson Sun 18-Oct-15 21:20:03

My 14 yo DD will come in for a 5 min cuddle and chat if she is up before me, or if I'm coming to bed before she's fallen asleep. It doesn't happen often, but it's lovely. I try to tell my children from time to time that they will never be too big for a cuddle with their Mum.

Oysterbabe Sun 18-Oct-15 21:20:05

Co sleeping at 10 is weird. Cuddling your kids in bed not weird.

McButtonwillow Sun 18-Oct-15 21:20:06

Lovely op, you carry on cherishing those moments. Sounds like a completely normal loving relationship to me.

AppleBanana Sun 18-Oct-15 21:21:40

I think it sounds sweet. Presumably you're both wearing PJs? Can't imagine why anyone would think it inappropriate to have a cuddle with your son.

I will certainly want to have a snuggle in bed with DD when she's 13, assuming she's not 'too cool' for that by then!

You've probably only got a few more months left before he stops wanting to, so cherish it.

CremeEggThief Sun 18-Oct-15 21:24:01

YANBU.
My 13 year old DS comes in for the odd cuddle.

DorotheaHomeAlone Sun 18-Oct-15 21:25:03

Enjoy it while you can. Sounds really lovely and not remotely inappropriate. Sadly he'll probably grow out of if soon.

IslandGirlie Sun 18-Oct-15 21:25:22

I hope my DCs do this at that age, it's lovely he feels comfortable with the connection smile

5madthings Sun 18-Oct-15 21:25:33

Yanbu op, my boys are 16, 13, 10 and 7. Yhe 16 yr old wouldn't do this now, he is not very cuddly but the others would. Ds4(7) will still hop in our bed occasionally and if ds3(10) was poorly and needed to either dh would sleep in with him or he would come in with us. Not odd at all.

Dd age four has just started sleeping in her own bed most nights, she gets in with us at about 6am most mornings.

All the madthings Co slept when little, they grew out of it and are quite happy in their own rooms but hopping in bed for a cuddle is lovely, enjoy it.

MrsMolesworth Sun 18-Oct-15 21:26:06

It's fine. it's lovely. Don't worry. Why set your standards by opinionated guests on LW? Trust your own judgement.

DS (13) still comes into my bed for a cuddle all the time. It's a great place to chat. They open up when they are all snuggled on the bed with you.

AgentProvocateur Sun 18-Oct-15 21:26:50

My 19-year-old DS came into my bed this morning to tell me all about the party he was at last night. He's not done that for a while. He did give me TMI grin

kippersmum Sun 18-Oct-15 21:28:09

How lovely smile Cherish every snuggle & cuddle you get, what a wonderful start to the weekend!

All too soon you will be embarassing him simply by breathing etc etc, normal teen stuff.

Ignore everyone & continue doing it for as long as possible smile hope you have fun

HackerFucker22 Sun 18-Oct-15 21:29:53

Stop watching Loose Women!!!

ThroughThickAndThin01 Sun 18-Oct-15 21:30:27

Yes my 19 year old DS does that too, Agent.

ScottishGlen Sun 18-Oct-15 21:30:50

Thank you all so much for your kind comments and yes, Apple - we are both wearing night attire!!

I also have DD10 who enjoys a cuddle too, but felt less concerned because she is younger and female. The article I was reading definitely highlighted the "weirdness" of cosleeping with a boy and some of the comments were quite unpleasant.

I shall go back to trusting my motherly instinct and enjoy those cuddles and chats while they last

AgentProvocateur Sun 18-Oct-15 21:32:21

ThroughThickAndThin, he even brought us up a cup of tea!

southeastastra Sun 18-Oct-15 21:33:30

it's great! my ds(14) picked me up the other day grin he's so much bigger than me! everyone thinks he's about 18 he's so big but he's a little kid still

ScottishGlen Sun 18-Oct-15 21:34:01

HackerFucker - I didn't watch Loose Women - just read an article in the newspaper. Want to make that completely clear!!!!!

PaulAnkaTheDog Sun 18-Oct-15 21:36:20

When I was 19 ds father committed suicide. To this day I am thankful that I could climb into my parent's bed in the morning with my one year old and have someone near me.

As long as it makes your ds happy then there's nothing wrong with it.

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