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AIBU?

To think that having a 2yo is the most unenjoyable thing ever?

113 replies

BasinHaircut · 17/10/2015 18:38

Am I doing it wrong?

He is selectively deaf.

What he does 'hear' he just says no to, even though he apparently doesn't understand the word no when I use it

He says everything 5 million times

He is loud

He is destructive

He is non-stop

He has started waking again at night

I hate it.

He is also hilarious and I love him so much it hurts, but 95% of the time he is awake I wish he wasn't here.

I am awful aren't I, and certainly not cut out to be a mother?

OP posts:
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Paddingtonthebear · 17/10/2015 18:42

3 year olds aren't much better

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SantanaLopez · 17/10/2015 18:42

Nah, you're totally normal. I enjoy mothering my toddler so much more when she's been at nursery a couple of days a week.

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penguinplease · 17/10/2015 18:43

I think you sound perfectly normal.
Try to enjoy the good bits, the bad bits will pass and be replaced by more but different bad bits depending on age.

Ultimately though time flies and before you know it they don't need you so much and these days you find hard will alter themselves in your memories as being the best time ever.

Have some wine x

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Oysterbabe · 17/10/2015 18:43

Oh I read the title as enjoyable Sad
I was hoping for a bit of reassurance for when mine gets there

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Squashybanana · 17/10/2015 18:43

Yabu only because 2 year olds are delicious. They have squashy podgy knees and round tummies. They find wonder in a snail in the garden or a spider spinning a web or a conker. They use you as a secure base to wander away from but keep returning to show you stuff because everything in the world is just so flipping amazing.

3 year olds, on the other hand..... [Wink]

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Paddingtonthebear · 17/10/2015 18:44

But that's flippant.

It all sounds normal re his behaviour but if you don't want him there 95% of the time then that's not normal. It is hard. Do you get any support? Perhaps you could chat to your GP?

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Leavingsosoon · 17/10/2015 18:45

They don't stay toddlers. I think it is normal, I don't really get much from parenting toddlers to be honest.

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ThomasRichard · 17/10/2015 18:47

No, you're not awful but either you've had a particularly bad day or you need a break.

  1. You and your DP if you have one need to call in the Health Visitor and crack down on the night waking. Mine was very helpful and getting a good night's sleep is bliss.

  2. Are you a SAHM? Can you afford to put him in nursery for a couple of mornings/afternoons a week, or do you qualify for free 2yo hours? If not, is there a local leisure centre with a crèche you could put him in for a couple of hours while you go for a swim/class/collapse in the café?

  3. Does he get enough exercise? I have a 2yo and my day off with her involves walking her brother to school, an hour of mininastics, an outing to the park or zoo and then swimming while her brother has his swimming lesson in the evening. I used to work p/t when DS was little and the routine was similar. If they stay in, we all go bonkers.

    Flowers
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PegsPigs · 17/10/2015 18:47

I have one and I hear you. I thought the new born stage was hard but the twos have been rubbish. She shrieks at nothing, going from 0-60 angry so quickly. Tiresome.

But she's also hilarious and wonderful and I need to try to remember that.

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rageagainsttheBIL · 17/10/2015 18:48

I have a two year old and it is knackering and annoying as hell but also brilliant, every single day. He's so funny and cute and wants to cuddle us at night and we are currently his world, which I know won't last...

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delilabell · 17/10/2015 18:49

Totally get what you mean. much prefer my ds now he's three. At 2 he was still a baby but wanted to be a little boy which caused a lot of "issues" . Now he's safely into little boy zone things are far better!

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Gottagetmoving · 17/10/2015 18:49

Depends what you expect when you have a child. Why would anyone think it is going to be all fun and lovely?
I loved having toddlers....and it was so much better than when they turned into teenagers. I would swap a teenager for a toddler in a heartbeat!

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cece · 17/10/2015 18:50

Every age has its trials and joys.

Mutters and eyes teenagers....

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FreeButtonBee · 17/10/2015 18:50

Try having two of the buggers Grin Wine

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Seeyounearertime · 17/10/2015 18:52

Lol I love your post OP. Totally understand it.
Some days I feel like all I do is say,
"Don't lock that, don't pick that up, get out of the drawer, leave the door stop alone, no you're not covering your hair in paint, don't eat the playdoh, get the TV remote out of you you box, no we're still not covering you in paint, no we're not going out right now because its raining, because its raining, because it's raining, stop saying why, because its annoying, because its annoying, because its annoying..... BED TIME"

I wouldn't change it for the world though ;)

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Strokethefurrywall · 17/10/2015 18:55

2 year olds are 40% cute, 60% tiny little murderous, demanding and tortuous dictators.
I was pregnant with DS2 when DS1 was 2 and I found the entire process arduous and exhausting.
Basically from 2-3 1/2 I found really hard. DS1 has just turned 4 and aside from being mega whiny he is actually a lot of fun to hang out with.
DS2 is 18 months and Im gearing myself up!!

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goawayalready · 17/10/2015 18:58

yup mine is speech delayed but he understands how to say no and mean it!

he throws food when he is at home literally platefuls he doesnt do that elsewhere (he goes to nursery and to nannys)

wont use cutlery (he did when he was one)

he flips out if i wont allow him to walk into a busy road or if i insist he goes in his pushchair because he is clearly knackered (or im knackered)

im totally unreasonable for expecting him to walk or pushchair i should clearly be carrying him and pushing the pushchair

he wishes to wear pajamas all day long

hates the bath but will use the swimming pool

refuses to wear a nappy or use the potty or the toilet

wont speak in front of the speech and language people

wakes at one am and demands top gear

cuddles me mercilessly when i collect him from nursery

refuses to fall asleep unless he is within touching distance of me

learnt a new sentence MOMMY YEAH OK!!

comes out with corkers like when asked what is wrong (he was crying) he screamed ITS MY FACE before sobbing uncontrollably

so im split really between Grin and Shock and Sad plus a dash of Confused

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Qwertybynature · 17/10/2015 19:00

How long has been waking in the night and how long are you up for? It's hard to remain patient and happy when you are knackered. You don't sound like a bad mum OP, you just sound like you need some decent sleep.

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Kraggle · 17/10/2015 19:00

I also have a terrible 2 year old. She is soooo much worse when she's tired. When you catch her just right she is fabulous and fantastic to be with.

I can't wait for her to get to bed at night time just to get some me time back but I love her so so much that when I look in on her before I go to bed it makes it all worthwhile.

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ShelaghTurner · 17/10/2015 19:00

Yeah...two is pretty hellish. But I'm loving my 3yo. She's cute, squishy, clever, funny, like talking to a little old lady in a child's body sometimes, makes the most wonderful faces, loves cuddles, looks angelic in her sleep, gets so excited about mundane things, loves life, loves learning new things....sigh...

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Bungleboggs · 17/10/2015 19:01

I'll swop you for two 3 year olds!!!Grin

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Badders123 · 17/10/2015 19:02

Hahahahahahahaa.
Swop you for a 12 year old?
:)
It'll pass op.
Then they will go into another hideous stage :)

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Qwertybynature · 17/10/2015 19:03

*Only asking as my 2 yr old is a crap sleeper and can be up for two hours in the night. It's a killer and I find my tolerance for toddler battles is non-existent when I've had no sleep.

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expatinscotland · 17/10/2015 19:03

Am soooo glad this stage is over.

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HelenaJustina · 17/10/2015 19:03

My 2.5yr old is scrummy and most of the time a hilarious delight... BUT the child before her was a hell-born babe at this age so think it is the comparison which is showing this one in such a good light!

My 8 yr old on the other hand is challenging in the extreme, behaving more like a toddler than the toddler!

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