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To be shocked by this?

(30 Posts)
CrohnicallyAspie Mon 28-Sep-15 14:22:26

It's rather trivial I'm afraid.

DD's wellies went missing from nursery a while ago, we don't know when as they hadn't been used for ages over the summer. The staff have been keeping an eye out for them, they had DD's name in so they checked lost property and the spare clothes cupboard etc.

They turned up on another child's feet, staff said there'd been a mix up and the wrong child had taken them but they spotted them, saw DD's name inside and and gave them back to DD. When I took them off her, the other child's name was written over my DD's!

I understand that sometimes mix ups do occur, but to write your own child's name OVER my child's, that's not a mix up, that's theft.

So we crossed child 2's name out and wrote DD's name again in permanent marker, inside and outside. Lesson learned.

Now if they could just return the 2 mittens DD has lost... (or even one would do, at least then she'd have a matching pair instead of wearing the remaining odd 2 together!)

Helpmeoutofthemaze Mon 28-Sep-15 14:25:57

Yes it's blatant theft, people do this I'm afraid!

As for mittens/gloves, sew her name on the outside so it's obvious if someone else starts wearing them.

For Wellies, if they are the completely smooth material, buy some personalised sticky labels (decent size, microwave and dishwasher proof) and again, stick them on the outside of the Wellies.

And be thankful you learnt this lesson before her stuff went walkabouts in primary school!

hiddenhome2 Mon 28-Sep-15 14:26:33

I would be asking to see the parent of the child whos name was written over your dad's name. What they've done is theft. What else are they stealing?

WicksEnd Mon 28-Sep-15 14:33:00

Only possible explanation I can think of is their DD has the same wellies and they thought you'd knicked hers and written your dds name in them?

CrohnicallyAspie Mon 28-Sep-15 14:33:57

hidden good point. I don't know the mum though, we pick up and drop off at different times. I am assuming the nursery will have a word, after all they've got to explain why child 2 no longer has the wellies she came in today. And there is CCTV all over the nursery so if anything major went missing it could be traced.

help think I will be emblazoning her name across everything in future! I work with children so I'm familiar with things going missing but it's the first time I've come across something so blatant!

BitchPeas Mon 28-Sep-15 14:34:34

I would complain to the nursery and point out the blatant theft and ask what action they will take against the other parent. They should at least talk to them!
It's awful, it happened with DSs £40 winter coat the first time he took it to nursery, he had only had it a couple of days, I had written his name on all the labels, it turned up 18 months later, well worn with all the labels cut out angry some people are just so shamelessly scummy.

TaperJeanGirl Mon 28-Sep-15 14:40:17

This happened to my sons jacket, the first time he wore it it went missing, turned up in the cloakroom 2 weeks later with another kids name written under his, they didn't every to write over his nameshockI let the school know what had happened and a non specific letter was sent out reminding parents what the procedure is if their child " accidentally" comes home in the wrong jacket! I obv label all my kids stuff, but as well as writing it in I also write their initials somewhere hidden, like inside a pocket so that they can't just cut the labels out/scrub over names, and in this particular denim jackets case I sewed patches all over it, outlaw style, no more stealing! grin

ChattingAway Mon 28-Sep-15 14:40:49

Sometimes our old nursery would keep wellies that a child had outgrown (with parent's permission) and either use them as spares, or hand down to another child who had also given theirs in. It's POSSIBLE this is what they thought had happened? That it was an outgrown, handed in pair? Unless your nursery never does that.

Seeline Mon 28-Sep-15 14:41:11

Similar happened with DD when he started school. About 2 weeks into reception she lost her logo'd school sweatshirt. Searched the classroom, lost property etc. the teacher was very nice and promised to keep an eye on the sweatshirts in class. After one PE lesson, she found DDs sweatshirt on another child. She knew it was DDs because it had a name tape with her full name on sewn onto the neck. The parents had crossed out the name on the name tape and written their DDs underneath!!

campervan67 Mon 28-Sep-15 14:42:13

Ok so once I was at a toddler group when DD1 was little, we were the last to leave and her coat was the last one there... Except when we got home I realised it was exactly the same coat but with someone else's name written in it shock Had no idea who the other person was, it wasn't a group I went to very often. So what else could I do? I crossed the name out and wrote DD's, figuring the other parent would probably do the same. Is it possible this is what's happened?

squoosh Mon 28-Sep-15 14:46:12


People who do this have the very brassiest of brass necks.

I'd be itching to challenge them.

Felyne Mon 28-Sep-15 14:47:15

It pisses me off. I know all of my child's clothes and can tell without even checking the name if they're wearing something that is not theirs, and it has happened occasionally at nursery pickup that my 2yo has an odd hat or coat on (and I tell the staff, take it off then and there and oh surprise no name in it at all...)
My DD had a beautiful straw hat with a red flower stolen by an older girl at nursery and despite me telling the teachers, and my DD asking the girl about it we never got it back. Then other girl soon after went to big school so we won't see her again. My DD's name was written in black permanent marker inside the rim of the hat, very clearly hers.
Katie's Mum if you're reading this, you suck.

Floggingmolly Mon 28-Sep-15 14:48:22

Except there wasn't an identical pair left behind, campervan confused

CrohnicallyAspie Mon 28-Sep-15 14:52:50

campervan I'd have phoned the toddler group organiser (even if it's just to explain what happened and say keep my coat) or made a special trip to return it if at all possible.

Anyway, I don't think that's what's happened here, as where are the other wellies? They should have turned up in the search for DD's, that has happened before where I work and then you know where to look for the lost item.

chattingaway I'm hoping that's what happened, if that's the case then I guess there will be a very apologetic message waiting for me tomorrow.

AugustRose Mon 28-Sep-15 14:55:52

Sadly it's not unusual.

When DD1 was in nursery we lost 5 tops over the school year. The nursery claimed it was the little girl whose peg was next to DD, she was always getting her sleeves wet so would change the top but was getting tops out of DD's bag instead of her own. We did eventually get 2 of them back but when I asked the nursery about them again they said 'oh well that mum has 5 children, she probably doesn't know whose tops are whose as she'll have so much washing' shock.

As a PP said I know if one of my DC comes home with clothing that isn't theirs and I have 4 DC.

fastdaytears Mon 28-Sep-15 14:58:49

Well the nursery will have to say something won't they! Update us please!

So cheeky.

smellylittleorange Mon 28-Sep-15 15:09:15

Another explanation could be that someone in the family assumed they were second hand /hand me downs but felt they needed labelling myDH would do this

SantasLittleMonkeyButler Mon 28-Sep-15 15:10:16

I've had this too. DS2 is now 14 but when he was around 8 or 9 I bought him two new school logo fleeces (the zip up jacket type). The first time he wore one of them it went missing. DS2 told me that XX had "pinched it off me & told the teacher it was his". It had DS2's name sewn in but apparently the teacher just took XX's word for it and didn't even check.

I spoke to XX's mum along the lines of "there seems to have been a mix-up with the boys fleeces today. Could you please check to see whether you have DS2's?" Days later she stomped over & told me she didn't have it and her DS "doesn't even own a fleece so there can't have been a mix-up". I spend the rest of the term seeing her DS in a fleece and wondering about it's origin.

This was September. The following July a very dirty & extremely well worn fleece turns up in the end of term lost property pile. With DS2's name still sewn in. I claim it & then XX's mother has the cheek to walk over to me in the playground and tell me that I've taken her DS's fleece from lost property! shock She knows it's his because she recognises a mark on it! I then show her DS2's name sewn in (I always sew them in a slightly unusual place to avoid people removing them!) - she obviously had had this fleece for the entire school year without noticing the name.

No word of apology, no nothing. She just said "well it's tatty now anyway" and stomped off. I may have tracked down the teacher in question & shown her the DS2 had been telling the truth after all blush.

Septembersunrays Mon 28-Sep-15 15:23:54

I would complain to the nursery and point out the blatant theft and ask what action they will take against the other parent

^ def raise it and ask nursery what the other family has said dont let them get away with it. hopefully misunderstanding but imp not to totally let it slide un challenged

mathanxiety Mon 28-Sep-15 15:27:06

Get used to it sad. Grown adults steal things.

The lesson is not to send your child to school with anything expensive if you can help it at all, to sew name tags into unusual spots (way into a sleeve or inside a hem, etc) and if you know for sure that X child is wearing your own child's item, go to the school and insist on a check there in front of you.

You should also send a letter to the school admin every time an item of your child's is clearly stolen (not just carelessly lost by your child). Don't make a big fuss at home about it, try to avoid giving your child the impression that you are feeling helpless and angry about theft, but make sure the school knows there is a problem.

If the nursery says nothing, or appears to be doing nothing, press them persistently.

MissMarpleCat Mon 28-Sep-15 15:33:01

I used to work in a nursery and theft was a common problem sad

OurBlanche Mon 28-Sep-15 15:38:32

Ah I remember those years.

My mother was brilliant at the 'sew in a slightly wonky name label at the collar then also add an embroidered set of initials in the hem and cuffs.'

Having done this to my new school duffel coat (warm, and expensive, my much loved Paddington coat) which went missing on day 2 she marched across the playground and snatched the coat off another kid's back.

Said kid's mum started screeching that my mother was mad, she would sue her for slander, etc, and pointed to the name label in the collar... and my mother called her a liar and a thief whilst displaying my initials in the hem and both cuffs.

I have never been so glad that dad's iffy work record meant we moved every year or so smile

Ah, the memories grin

Effiewhaursmabaffies Mon 28-Sep-15 15:42:13

I has someone steal DD2's boots from the swimming pool. Had to carry her home as well. Some people are just scummy.

Badders123 Mon 28-Sep-15 15:47:12

It's shit but it happens.
All you can do is label everything, and not send in anything expensive (to be fair most schools do try and state this)
So my ds1 (12) has the cheapest payg Nokia there is.
Cheapest calculator.
Cheap pens etc.

Witchend Mon 28-Sep-15 15:50:01

For wellies it could be an honest mistake.

Round us wellies get passed round pretty regularly and it's not uncommon for a pair to have 3 or 4 names inside.
I used to get passed them usually beginning of summer and store them until Winter when I'd get them out, and not really pay much attention to what type they are.
I've had once or twice where I've forgotten to name them immediately and I've named them after a wearing.

Then we add dh who never has a clue which clothes are whose. Heck he's claimed ds' (age 8) socks last weekend as his own and held firmly to that belief until I made him try to get one on his foot.

He's come home a few times with the wrong stuff with the dc which I've had to return.

If a member of staff had said "oh she brought wellies with her this morning" he'd have believed them, brought them back and put them into the wellie pile in the garage. And when I went to get wellies there they would have been.

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