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AIBU?

to wonder why teachers are so sure school is better than home Ed for all children?

213 replies

IceBeing · 01/09/2015 22:34

An acquaintance is thinking of removing her 5 yo from school as he has started self-harming due to anxiety about going.

The school seem to be all over themselves to tell the parent that there is no way home ed would be preferable to carrying on in school.

What makes schools so very certain on this point and what would it take for a school to admit a child might be better off being taught at home for a spell or even entirely?

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OwlinaTree · 01/09/2015 22:38

I can't answer for all schools, but the few children we have had removed and homeschooled have been considered mildly 'at risk'. We have been concerned for their safety, more than for their education.

Not saying this is the case with your friend of course, and many children are very successfully home schooled I'm sure.

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IceBeing · 01/09/2015 22:40

That is interesting...you mean there have been safeguarding issues?

No - I shouldn't accuse all schools...although we got much the same response when we went round schools here and hinted we might home ed....

We basically got total horror and dire warning that when (not if) we changed our minds it would be impossible to get a school place....because...kids never move house and need school places randomly in the middle of the year!

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SuburbanRhonda · 01/09/2015 22:41

What makes schools so very certain on this point

"Schools" are not so very certain on this point. Your friend's child's school is. And they may have good reasons, which neither nor friend nor your friend are privy to. Or they may not.

How this is relevant to the other thousands of schools in the country I couldn't possibly guess Hmm

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SuburbanRhonda · 01/09/2015 22:43

There is a real crisis in primary school places so schools are wise to inform parents about the risks of in-year applications.

Not sure why you would be going round schools hinting about home schooling?

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JenniferYellowHat1980 · 01/09/2015 22:44

As a parent and a (secondary) teacher, I know I couldn't give the broad based education and the social variety that my DCs thrive on, even though home ed was what I initially wanted.

I'm sad for you friends and their DS. Did they consider a different school?

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Rainuntilseptember15 · 01/09/2015 22:45

Why would you go round schools and talk about home ed? That's like touring gyms and saying you plan to buy a treadmill for the house instead.

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IceBeing · 01/09/2015 22:45

because we were trying work out whether or not school was the best option? Why wouldn't you go around and ask eg. how schools deal with particular issues etc.

Maybe it is just schools in the NE that are like this...

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Osolea · 01/09/2015 22:45

I agree schools aren't certain about this, and the particular school you're talking about might not even be certain about it for all children.

The only way you're going to find out the answer is if your acquaintance asks the school and then tells you.

But I have known a parent to overly worry about their child's anxiety and keep them off school because of it. The child was only anxious because the mothers own anxiety was rubbing off on the child so much, and much of the time she was happy, but the mother couldn't accept that. It was about her needs, not the child's.

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coffeeisnectar · 01/09/2015 22:45

Thousands of kids are home schooled very well. Then again I've seen a post on another forum from a woman who isn't concerned that her 10 year can't read, does no lessons as such but does learn from watching documentaries on tv apparently.

I do think there needs to be assessments in place so kids like that don't fall through the gap. My friend home schools her son and he's doing brilliantly.

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IceBeing · 01/09/2015 22:46

I think it would be reasonable to go to a gym and ask them what that added over simply buying a treadmill? No?

Fact finding before making decisions seems the way to go to me...

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IceBeing · 01/09/2015 22:48

os I can see that - but I don't think self harming is easily imagined.

coffee I actually agree with you in terms of more oversight needed...the fact you can simply never sign up your child for school and there will never be any checks smacks of children being their parents property....which I cannot get on board with whatsoever.

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poocatcherchampion · 01/09/2015 22:49

Presumably most teachers have some conviction that their approach of teaching is beneficial to children and young people?

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IceBeing · 01/09/2015 22:51

I am sure they do! but why the conviction that parents don't have the same quality of approach?

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NeedsAsockamnesty · 01/09/2015 22:51

I can't answer for all schools, but the few children we have had removed and homeschooled have been considered mildly 'at risk'. We have been concerned for their safety, more than for their education

Was that the case prior to removal or just after?

If just after then it's a bigoted attitude that needs challenging.

A higher % of HE kids are brought to the attention of children's services (than schooled children) but a lower % end up with any form of intervention at all. Home education in itself is not a welfare concern and should not be treated as such

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IceBeing · 01/09/2015 22:53

Don't get me wrong - I couldn't perform at anywhere near the level of a trained teacher when trying to teach a wildly mixed ability class of 30+.

But I don't have to do that as a home ed parent...I have to teach a class of 1, which is somewhat easier proposition.

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Scarydinosaurs · 01/09/2015 22:53

As a teacher I certainly wouldn't say to a parent that home ed is the wrong choice unless I believed that to be true. In a case recently, I actively encouraged it because it was 100% right for that pupil, and I'm not some blinkered idiot that thinks "my way, right way- one size, fits all".

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SuburbanRhonda · 01/09/2015 22:54

I think people are puzzled as to why you would go round a school (presumably as a "prospective parent") and talk about home schooling with the staff there.

Discuss it with other home educators, or family or friends, but with people who educate children in a school? Seems a bit goady.

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NeedsAsockamnesty · 01/09/2015 22:56

There is a real crisis in primary school places so schools are wise to inform parents about the risks of in-year applications

It can often be easier to get a school place after HE when utilising assistance from the EHE dept. they are often quite keen to assist with finding a place.

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IceBeing · 01/09/2015 22:57

We didn't go in wearing a 'screw you we are home ed-ing badge' we just asked questions along the lines of what are the benefits of school education over home...and got back essentially nothing but hysteria and hype.

We really wanted to know how hard it is thought to be to reintegrate at 7ish (junior school here). We favour a Scandi approach to learning which basically says no formal education till 7.

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Fairenuff · 01/09/2015 22:57

I think it would be a safe guarding issue. If the child is self harming it is sensible that he is monitored and supported, rather than withdrawn and possibly isolated.

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coffeeisnectar · 01/09/2015 22:58

I think a few children might benefit from home ed but it needs to be done whole heartedly, parent meeting up with local home ed group, making sure children is still socialising etc. It's not just about learning to read and do maths. And I think if a child has only been in school a short time then they should be given the chance to try a bit longer.

Dd 2 took 6 months to settle at pre school, was so attached to me but we persevered and now she's nearly 10, starting middle school this week and is excited about it.

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OwlinaTree · 01/09/2015 22:58

needsasock prior to removal. Suggestion of involving services seemed to prompt it.

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amarmai · 01/09/2015 22:59

well their jobs would be affected if larger numbers of children were HE.

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Emochild · 01/09/2015 23:00

I've been told by a head teacher that you can't home ed without regular inspections from the LA and you have to demonstrate that your child is having 20hrs of teaching per week -for secondary age this needs to be done by a tutor for core subjects

This nonsense is why SOME schools are very anti home ed

For some children home ed can be very effective -parents need to make the choice that is right for their child, although at 5 that may mean that you are opting out of the school system until they are in year 3 due to infant class sizes and the area you live in

For some families, that us the ideal anyway so no problem

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NewLife4Me · 01/09/2015 23:00

Teachers are taught to believe in the system to a certain degree. They have to do as they are told and believe in this way as it's the only way if you subscribe to the system.

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