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To think an apology and some support would be nice.

(14 Posts)
whatisforteamum Sat 22-Aug-15 20:34:57

when i left work last night i got spoken to disrespectably by my line manager when i asked to leave at 1045 as i was on until quiet. A colleague told him he was rude.
Came home had bath and tea ready for job trial today after 2 yrs of long shifts,I asked my dh asked if i was sleeping in the bed as i usually sleep downstairs and dd was away so her bed was free.he has fri sat sun off so i asked if he could sleep in hers and i get the double for the 2nd time this yrto be rested for the fact im job trialing on top of my sheduled hrs.Shouting something and door slamming off he huffed. i did sleep well despite his temper tantrum.The trial went well and it is a chance to cook new fresh food in a slower paced lovely place.A real opportunity for some one more mature to switch cooking styles.
I told him on his return from golf to no response just carried on eating.He said he was tired.When i asked him to apologise for waking ds and door slamming he did the "sorry " eyeroll.AIBU to expect an apology or well done for the job after 11 yrs at the same place.?

Cloppysow Sat 22-Aug-15 20:41:33

Yanbu. He's being a spoilt brat.

Why do you sleep downstairs?

whatisforteamum Sat 22-Aug-15 20:56:32

He snores badly and hasnt done anything about it..he knows how hard work has been since we transferred 2 yrs ago this is huge for me as moral is dreadful at my current place and it was only the thought that df is dying that made me carry on.Now i really dont want to.

bloodyteenagers Sat 22-Aug-15 20:59:32

So why do you sleep on the sofa. It should be him. He's the one that snores and can be helped. Doesn't want to so he can sleep on the sofa.

thecatsarecrazy Sat 22-Aug-15 21:03:15

Does his snoring wake you? My dh snores too so I always go to bed first. He falls asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow.

whatisforteamum Sat 22-Aug-15 21:11:51

He also gets up at 430 and i get home 12 ish..considering single beds and yes i do have ear plugs.

whatisforteamum Sat 22-Aug-15 21:12:53

i would never door slam and if i ever did i would say sorry for being so moody.

QOD Sat 22-Aug-15 21:13:32

From him or work?

whatisforteamum Sat 22-Aug-15 21:48:01

Both im fed up of being the brunt of angry pple.I text my line manager to say sorry i had somewhere to be today and he did say sorry he snapped..the same guy who said my dd was prob a workshy slut as she hadnt found a job at 17 !! He also said my parents are old and will die anyway (they both have incurable cancer) and said everyone is an fing skiver after the gp signed me off for 2 weeks and i went back after 1 and someone else to time off .

OneMillionScovilles Sat 22-Aug-15 23:38:17

I'm a bit lost OP - sorry! I think it's as follows:

- you usually sleep apart from your DH, on a single bed/sofa?
- you've had a challenging week, doing job trial hours on top of your usual shifts
- you asked your DH for a bed-swap vs normal arrangements so you could be well-rested for the above
- stomping and yelling ensued?

If I'm following correctly, YANBU - he should be a damn sight more flexible and supportive.

BackforGood Sun 23-Aug-15 00:07:32

I too am completely confused by the opening post (and later ones havenot really helped).

On one point, an apology that has to be asked for, isn't worth the apology.
I don't understand the rest of what's going on though.

TheCatsFlaps Sun 23-Aug-15 00:16:46

So glad I'm not the only one BackforGood. I'm fucking over this.

whatisforteamum Sun 23-Aug-15 10:59:01

yes onemillion spot on.I would like some support from dh knowing how shit my worklife has been..a bed to sleep in and an occasional bit of consideration.Sorry if the post was confusing my head is all over the place juggling the teens and sulking childish 55 yr old one.

MidniteScribbler Sun 23-Aug-15 23:32:33

If you aren't getting to sleep in a real bed every night, then you need to take steps to change that. Personally I'd be kicking his arse out and sleeping on the double bed every night. No having to worry about door slamming either.

Genuinely, why are you with him? He has no consideration for you, he's just a fucking selfish prick. Letting your wife sleep on a sofa every night because you are a snorer is very selfish, he could see a doctor, take turns, move to a house where you each have your own bedroom, and at the very least, acknowledge that he is a total arsehole to not do any of the above.

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