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AIBU to not want my twin sister and her DS to visit again after a torrid two days?

(6 Posts)
HaventAStitchToWear Tue 18-Aug-15 03:29:28

My sister and her DS came to stay last week for a couple of days which I had been dreading because her DS is a bit of a handful and I'm 33wks pregnant. I have a DS (5) and DD (3 last week) and my DH works long days with an hour plus commute.

The whole time my sister and her DS were here he got away with murder because she lets him. Her DS (six weeks younger than my DD) is a stocky boy and would push and hit my DC and sis did nothing. In the end I did all the telling off. But then she would coddle him and say "it's just that you're heavy handed, not everyone plays like you" or her DS would snatch and whine and be generally unpleasant and she'd look at me feebly and say "he doesn't understand" or "he's just tired". My DD is just 6 weeks older and understands perfectly when she's told not to do something or not to bash a child or they will be consequences.

He has done things like punched my DS, picked up a toy and hit him across the head with it, pushed my DD off a step ladder then lied about it (I know she shouldn't have been on it) smile, broken or taken toys that were put away (even though there's a garden and living room full of toys he can play with), and general snatching, shouting, not listening and answering back to me to name a few.

AIBU to not want them to visit again until attitudes towards bad behaviour are addressed?

TheHouseOnTheLane Tue 18-Aug-15 03:39:31

YANBU to be annoyed that she makes no attempt to discipline him. Can he talk? I often find toddlers with poor language skills resort to this type of behaviour out of frustration.

AGirlCalledJohnny Tue 18-Aug-15 03:40:21

Does sound exhausting wear and I wouldn't want them back until I'd seen for myself he was capable of treating his cousins better, but I'm not sure what you mean by "addressed"? Hopefully not that you're going to be the one to point out that her PFB is a PITA, because trust me, you're on a hiding to nothing there grin

On the upside, I've seen the most obnoxious 3 year olds, who did nothing but wreak havoc whilst being indulged by their parents, turn into quite lovely and sweet kids eventually so don't give up hope!

Minionkeeper Tue 18-Aug-15 07:22:47

It is possible that he doesn't understand - especially if being told off for hurting people is new to him.
I know that my daughter's communication skills and understanding were about a year ahead of my son's at the same age. He was also a bit of a thug but he did get better as he got older.

sanfairyanne Tue 18-Aug-15 08:22:38

some 3 year olds can just be a nightmare. meeting up on a daytrip might be better til he is a bit older

farmerslife Tue 18-Aug-15 08:26:50

Are you me ??? I am in exactly the same situation I have just had a weeks holiday in this situation, I am at a loss as how to deal with it. All ideas welcome.

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